Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
You seem to be placing all the blame on women here. It's unrealistic to expect a woman to be enthusiastic and desiring of sex all the time. Maybe she has a good reason not to be interested. Find out what it is before you assume she's frigid.
Maybe she shouldn't get married then? Men generally like sex, lots of sex. I am simply explaining that if a women is not enthusiastic about sex her man will look for it elsehwere be it porn or other women.
Don't get married to guys that do not turn you on. It will backfire.
cause women who get a lot of male attention are more valued by men. guys want to wine and dine them and take them out on dates. they get a lot of positive reinforcement from others because of how they look, thus making them happier. since i dont get that, there's no way I can ever be happy with myself
i actually agree with you wholly on the point that women who are more attractive get positive reinforcement from men in general and others get put down. There was a woman on here posted a thread about how she could not get dates and didn't know what was wrong. She put a picture up and was pretty attractive (as to the standards of what most men like; white and blond) and not one of those people from my recollection ever came in the thread and claimed she was 'whining,' it was all 'well it must be the men because you're pretty, 'what a shame. they are the ones missing out!' etc. I took note of that, just sayin'. It is what it is, nyanna.
that's the difference between me and you, you really let it consume you that men aren't doing these things and claim it's affecting your entire life. Doesn't have to be like that. You won't look like the 'ideal' so just accept it already. I just accept the face, skin tone and body I have b/c I don't have any other choice. Oh well.
You try to 'keep' a positive attitude to avoid the stress then? Okay, that is fine. I don't 'keep' any kind of attitude one way or the other, I mean I don't make an effort to be positive for the sake of everyone else. You said you think everyone DOES have value to everyone else. Okay that is a so called positive statement right, keeping in line with what you try and do everyday? I don't feel I should have to agree with that statement just to display that I am 'positive,' if I don't really agree with it, so I don't play into those things in an effort avoid 'stirring the pot' or getting the dreaded label of 'negative.' I already know you understand this line of thinking and most others do not, haha. If somebody have black/white thinking and they feel they have to change that to fit in better with others, so be it. I am not one of those people though.
I do beleive you say those things because you believe them to be true, just as I do the same.
And that is just fine. As far as being positive? I do it for myself. It makes for a much better life when one is keeping a positive viewpoint in life. I don't think anyone has to agree with anything. Just as you stated how you feel, so did I.
Doll Eyes, you don't have to change your way of thinking for a soul in this world. You be the you that you are.
In this thread, I have admired many of your view points.
cause women who get a lot of male attention are more valued by men. guys want to wine and dine them and take them out on dates. they get a lot of positive reinforcement from others because of how they look, thus making them happier. since i dont get that, there's no way I can ever be happy with myself
You have completely handed your power over to some anonymous man/men.
There, anonymous man/men, make me happy, nothing else ever will.
I am such a failure and a shallow human being the only self worth I have is through YOUR eyes...even though I do not know you, like you, or value you.
My entire reason for being and existing rests on some random jerk assessing my breast size.
I have no other redeeming qualities or reason for existing or sucking in oxegyn, other than being pleasing to a person who I don't even know.
I have no self esteem or self love, other than what I percieve through some random jerk off's comment.
I am unfit to call myself "woman". I am so shallow and substanceless I am merely a shadow waiting for some unknown male to breathe meaning into my pathetic existence.
Maybe she shouldn't get married then? Men generally like sex, lots of sex. I am simply explaining that if a women is not enthusiastic about sex her man will look for it elsehwere be it porn or other women.
Don't get married to guys that do not turn you on. It will backfire.
Well, I don't agree with this. Marriage doesn't mean you have sex all the time. You know, many women like sex too, and lots of it.
If a man marries a woman and suddenly she doesn't like sex then maybe there is a problem and they should talk openly about it. I don't see why he would automatically turn to another woman.
Also.....why would someone invest a life in someone who didn't turn them on?
i actually agree with you wholly on the point that women who are more attractive get positive reinforcement from men in general and others get put down. There was a woman on here posted a thread about how she could not get dates and didn't know what was wrong. She put a picture up and was pretty attractive (as to the standards of what most men like; white and blond) and not one of those people from my recollection ever came in the thread and claimed she was 'whining,' it was all 'well it must be the men because you're pretty, 'what a shame. they are the ones missing out!' etc. I took note of that, just sayin'. It is what it is, nyanna.
that's the difference between me and you, you really let it consume you that men aren't doing these things and claim it's affecting your entire life. Doesn't have to be like that. You won't look like the 'ideal' so just accept it already. I just accept the face, skin tone and body I have b/c I don't have any other choice. Oh well.
if I am sometimes being put down for not having large breasts, a big butt, or light complexion, how can I not let it consume me? its very hard to do. people think its so easy but its not. I cant just forget about it & be happy when sometimes I am reminded that I don't quite measure up to women who have larger assets than i do.
You have completely handed your power over to some anonymous man/men.
There, anonymous man/men, make me happy, nothing else ever will.
I am such a failure and a shallow human being the only self worth I have is through YOUR eyes...even though I do not know you, like you, or value you.
My entire reason for being and existing rests on some random jerk assessing my breast size.
I have no other redeeming qualities or reason for existing or sucking in oxegyn, other than being pleasing to a person who I don't even know.
I have no self esteem or self love, other than what I percieve through some random jerk off's comment.
I am unfit to call myself "woman". I am so shallow and substanceless I am merely a shadow waiting for some unknown male to breathe meaning into my pathetic existence.
well please tell me what can I do to compensate for my lack of breasts and booty?? what can I do to have any value to anybody especially a man??
if I am sometimes being put down for not having large breasts, a big butt, or light complexion, how can I not let it consume me? its very hard to do. people think its so easy but its not. I cant just forget about it & be happy when sometimes I am reminded that I don't quite measure up to women who have larger assets than i do.
I have small breasts a small butt and am too pink.
Do you see me for one single second thinking I am inferior to ANYONE?????????
No you do not.
I love how you post about your s/o watching porn and the issues you have with it, when you don't even have a s/o.
Nor are you likely to , because NO ONE can tolerate your poo covered view of life.
You have completely handed your power over to some anonymous man/men.
There, anonymous man/men, make me happy, nothing else ever will.
I am such a failure and a shallow human being the only self worth I have is through YOUR eyes...even though I do not know you, like you, or value you.
My entire reason for being and existing rests on some random jerk assessing my breast size.
I have no other redeeming qualities or reason for existing or sucking in oxegyn, other than being pleasing to a person who I don't even know.
I have no self esteem or self love, other than what I percieve through some random jerk off's comment.
I am unfit to call myself "woman". I am so shallow and substanceless I am merely a shadow waiting for some unknown male to breathe meaning into my pathetic existence.
This. (I couldn't rep again, I've repped enough people in this thread alone)
You are giving everyone else power to how YOU feel about YOURSELF. Does that make any freaking sense at all?? Didn't think so. Is it easy to get over insecurity and low self esteem? No. But for your own sanity, you should start learning to do so and take baby steps if you have to. You need to worry more about having value to YOURSELF. To hell with having value to anyone else. Do they pay your bills? Are they doing anything for you? No. Then who gives a flying rats ass what your value is to them right now.
Hell even if you have to do this every day, do it:
if I am sometimes being put down for not having large breasts, a big butt, or light complexion, how can I not let it consume me? its very hard to do. people think its so easy but its not. I cant just forget about it & be happy when sometimes I am reminded that I don't quite measure up to women who have larger assets than i do.
Well, Nyanna, I just read this and I have a better understanding now. I was made to feel that way for many years. Like I just wasn't good enough. The difference is that it was in an emotionally abusive marriage.
I recall you mentioning even your father telling you weren't good enough in one way or another. I do understand what you are going through but I don't quite understand exactly why you are going through it.
For some reason in your life I suppose you were made to feel like you were not good enough and it has continued on into other areas in your life.
It can be hard to overcome, but it can be done. When you are told enough times that you are no good you begin to believe it and you are right, it can consume you. I am sorry for judging you. I still think that therapy could help you tremendously. There are also a few good books that you could read, and I wish I could remember what they are, but I will think about it.
You just have to come to terms that you are who you are. You need to learn to see yourself in a more positive light and carry yourself in a more positive manner. You need to lift your head up and just be proud of who you are.
Robyn
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
It is what it is, nyanna. 
LOL.
