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Of course, but I wasn't talking about physical intimacy or focusing on it, like you claimed. Never mind referring to aerobic acts or treating people like rag dolls. I have no idea where you got that from the term "prospective partner".
Well if you need to know their private sexual feelings towards this or that gender with regards to sexual intimacy, then you say "prospective partner" doesn't mean such, it confuses me. Sorry it might be partly my fault
This thread is asking if it is ok to break up with someone because they experience same sex attraction.
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Quote:
Originally Posted by NancyDrew1
Well if you need to know their private sexual feelings towards this or that gender with regards to sexual intimacy, then you say "prospective partner" doesn't mean such, it confuses me. Sorry it might be partly my fault
This thread is asking if it is ok to break up with someone because they experience same sex attraction.
I never mentioned needing to know at all.
But on most online dating sites I've seen, people put their sexual orientations on it, or address it in their profiles. That's all I said.
Some people feel tricked when something they feel is a big deal is held from them.
When who feels it is a big deal?
Are you saying whether your girlfriend or boyfriend experiences same sex attraction is a "big deal" for you???
You are not experiencing it so I say lay off. It's not your business.
If you cannot care for someone for who they are, then you need help yourself. You need to work on yourself instead of feeling this false sense of entitlement over another person's intenstly private sexual feelings. It's really dis-concerting and a red flag that you have such a warped sense of boundaries for another person. Someone you care about, supposedly? (<--hypotethical)
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Okay. Then how about his.... you don't have to reveal that you are bisexual, but ask the person that you are interested in if they would want to date a person who is bisexual, if they say they would not be interested, you will have your answer without revealing yourself.
I think it is a weird question but certainly the better way to go about it if what their body feels is so intensely personal to you. Personally I think you should focus on your own bodily feelings and not seek to find what you perceive to be negative, about another person.(<--hypothetical) JMHO
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Why waste your time with someone who does not want to be with you as a bisexual person? Why not get with someone who has no problem with it and that you don't have to hide it. It's a win/win for both.
By the time someone doesn't want to be with you because they themselves have very poor sexual boundaries, to put it mildly, then you've dodged a bullet anyhow. Because it WILL manifest itself in other ways. Not just a warped sense of entitlement to intrude upon anothers sexual boundaries/feelings.
Last edited by NancyDrew1; 12-08-2016 at 09:28 AM..
.Are you saying whether your girlfriend or boyfriend experiences same sex attraction is a "big deal" for you???
..
It's a big deal to many people.
Quote:
Originally Posted by NancyDrew1
.You are not experiencing it so I say lay off. It's not your business.
I disagree. It is the person's business if a bisexual person becomes romantically involved. If it's no big deal, then tell them.
Quote:
Originally Posted by NancyDrew1
.If you cannot care for someone for who they are, then you need help yourself.
If you want someone to care for you for who you are, then tell them that who you are.....that you are bisexual, so they can care for who you are.
[quote=NancyDrew1;46441511.You need to work on yourself instead of feeling this false sense of entitlement over another person's intenstly private sexual feelings. It's really dis-concerting and a red flag that you have such a warped sense of boundaries for another person. ..[/QUOTE]
It's entitlement to not let someone know that you are bisexual. You are feeling a sense of false entitlement and taking away their choice if they want to be with you or not. Don't you want them to know the true you?
I disagree. It is the person's business if a bisexual person becomes romantically involved. If it's no big deal, then tell them.
If you want someone to care for you for who you are, then tell them that who you are.....that you are bisexual, so they can care for who you are.
It is a FEELING, it isn't who you are. I once had a boyfriend who until age 20, had weird feelings towards a certain age girl. He isn't a child molester, he just chose to stay away from a particular look that was pounded into him in childhood.
If I have a sexual fantasy about an orge, it isn't WHO I am. It isn't something in real life I feel, it never crosses over and I have NEVER felt the need to do it in real life. Ever. It's a feeling, that's all.
It is temporal
Feelings do not define a person. This is the type of mentality an unstable person who has no boundaries would feel. This is why they are tossed to and fro like waves in life unable to commit and hold a real relationship.
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It's entitlement to not let someone know that you are bisexual.
People's feelings and what they grapple with is not your self entitlement. It's theirs. As you yourself are a safe person to them, and TRULY care about them, it won't matter. UNLESS it is something that they themselves feel could cross over in real life, and that happens, but it is obviously very rare. Otherwise I would've raped a guy by now. Rape in my mind is NOT rape in real life, and I have never wanted to attack anyone, ever in real life. Play acting in the bedroom, yeah maybe I'm just kidding I wouldn't do it
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Don't you want them to know the true you?
You are defining a person by a feeling. That is not "getting to know the real person" it is a selfish, screwed up mentality from someone with poor sexual boundaries. The types that act upon those feelings. Feelings are fleeting, they can come and go. Anyone who doesn't understand this is at risk for dwelling upon it and acting upon them. Then it escalates into going so far as they think they are defined by it
They is not the type of stable person I would want to be married to.
I don't think anyone has proposed that a person should not be able to decide who they can date or not date.
There is a poster (whom I've been responding to) who feels that it's not a person's business if a potential romantic partner is bisexual.
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I'm just kidding I wouldn't do it
