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I've never understood my attraction to awkward guys, and I'm not sure if I've ever found any patterns. The only pattern I've found is that as an INFJ, I'm almost always attracted to men who are INTPs. That's basically the personality type of an absent minded professor. The types of guys who are awkward because socializing is like a foreign idea to them, but they can be completely immersed in a hobby and can go on lengthy, monologue style tangents on one aspect of their hobby.
Something about a guy who has a hard time socializing is fascinating and attractive to me, but I have no idea why that is. It's not just an emotional attraction, but a physical one as well. If I see a guy stuttering or making strange movements because he's unsure of himself, I want to make out with him at that very moment. I think it may have to do with a need for power or control, I feel like that type of person could also be unsure in the bedroom, and so I can teach, or just take control. I'm often surprised when it turns out that they're a total dynamo in the bedroom, but I like that too. So...Yeah, I don't know.
I've never understood my attraction to awkward guys, and I'm not sure if I've ever found any patterns. The only pattern I've found is that as an INFJ, I'm almost always attracted to men who are INTPs. That's basically the personality type of an absent minded professor. The types of guys who are awkward because socializing is like a foreign idea to them, but they can be completely immersed in a hobby and can go on lengthy, monologue style tangents on one aspect of their hobby.
Something about a guy who has a hard time socializing is fascinating and attractive to me, but I have no idea why that is. It's not just an emotional attraction, but a physical one as well. If I see a guy stuttering or making strange movements because he's unsure of himself, I want to make out with him at that very moment. I think it may have to do with a need for power or control, I feel like that type of person could also be unsure in the bedroom, and so I can teach, or just take control. I'm often surprised when it turns out that they're a total dynamo in the bedroom, but I like that too. So...Yeah, I don't know.
You are a dream girl to so many guys out there. Lots of shy awkward men like a dominating, take charge type woman, mostly because that's the only woman they will ever get with. The rest of the women are standing around waiting to get swept off their feet.
Take it from a guy who was 30 before his first relationship I'm still shy but I'm way more outgoing and friendly now. I make it point to casually talk to random people and I force myself to do something out of my comfort zone every chance I get. It sucks being born wired a little different from the rest of society, shyness just isn't an attractive trait. I'll always be shy but I've finally found out how to hide it.
I wish I would've started working out and agreeing to hangout with people in my teens, I'm definitely 10-15 years behind my peers, socially. Maybe it's good though, who knows how things would've turned out.
I think the problem with girls who are attracted to shy guys is they are both too inept to make it work without some random heroic act on one of their parts or just something random in general.
I started becoming interested in shy guys say around middle school when I got tired of the loud obnoxious ones going out of their way to humiliate me. It just happened that way I guess, but I'll add that it's never worked out for me.
In my experience, women that are MORE interested in shy guys are the ones that prefer to "wear the pants", so to speak. They like to be in control and see those kinds of men as having more "doormat" potential. Whether they're right or not is a different topic altogether, but that's what I've seen.
Most young women look at guys who are shy as boring. Those guys tend to not have much friends and aren't very social. They want guys who are fun,exiting, and can entertain them.
Most young women look at guys who are shy as boring. Those guys tend to not have much friends and aren't very social. They want guys who are fun,exiting, and can entertain them.
I'd consider myself shy, or more introverted at the very least. I have some social anxiety. But I open up in a short amount of time; it's not like I'm a clam at all times. I have plenty of friends who enjoy my company. I can entertain a woman, and have done so often in the past and present.
The girls that seemed to pursue me more diligently were more aggressive by nature. I think maybe they looked at it as a challenge.
You can be shy or reserved, and still lead a fun, exciting, or interesting life. There are different levels of shyness though. I've met people at social outings who you could tell were forcing themselves to be there. They just did not seem comfortable at all. People like that may have a more difficult time, but they represent extreme cases.
When I was a teenager/college student, I was always intrigued by the shy/quiet/awkward guys who stood on the sidelines, and would often go for those guys, because they were more interesting to me than the more outgoing guys who put it all out there. Part of it is that I always found the "life of the party" guys to be attentionwhores and annoying in that regard. A big part of it was being intrigued at being the one who got to take apart the puzzle piece by piece. Another part was that I probably at some level felt smug at the idea of finding the diamond in the rough that got overlooked, and at being the girl with enough insight to recognize it.
The problem I ran into with this approach is that sometimes you do get that diamond in the rough, and other times, you get guys with significant social problems, even mental health issues, etc. that weigh heavily on a relationship, ultimately. Sometimes shy, awkward guys are just introverted, but are still capable of having healthy relationships. Sometime, shy, awkward guys have a manageable level of social anxiety that can be worked with, sometimes, they have it to a crippling level. Sometimes shy, awkward guys are people who have major deficits in relating healthily to others.
"Reserved" is a different animal than "crippled by social anxiety." Learning how to tell the difference was something I got better with with age, but as I got older, I increasingly became drawn to more outgoing, interactive, affable guys. There's also a question of resources, and allocation of time and effort. Do I really want to spend ages peeling away the layers of intriguing, inscrutable guy who seems to prefer to keep those layers tightly wrapped, only to find, after all the time and effort allotted, that there's nothing much there? Nah. I still don't go for center-of-attention guy, but somebody who's forthright, outgoing, earnest, and friendly, versus brooding on the edges of things and expecting to have somebody else put in all the effort to draw him out? Any day. I married forthright, outgoing, earnest, and friendly.
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I'm still shy but I'm way more outgoing and friendly now. I make it point to casually talk to random people and I force myself to do something out of my comfort zone every chance I get. It sucks being born wired a little different from the rest of society, shyness just isn't an attractive trait. I'll always be shy but I've finally found out how to hide it. 
