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from The Art of Courtly Love c. 1174 ADby Andreas Cappellanus
1. Marriage is no real excuse for not loving
2. He who is not jealous cannot love
3. No one can be bound by a double love.
4. It is well known that love is always increasing or decreasing.
5. That which a lover takes against his will of his beloved has no relish.
6. Boys do not love until they arrive at the age of maturity.
7. When one lover dies, a widowhood of two years is required of the survivor.
8. No one should be deprived of love without the very best of reasons.
9. No one can love unless he is impelled by the persuasion of love.
10. Love is always a stranger in the home of avarice.
11. It is not proper to love any woman whom one should be ashamed to seek to marry.
12. A true lover does not desire to embrace in love anyone except his beloved.
13. When made public love rarely endures.
14. The easy attainment of love makes it of little value; difficulty of attainment makes it prized.
15. Every lover regularly turns pale in the presence of his beloved.
16. When a lover suddenly catches sight of his beloved his heart palpitates.
17. A new love puts to flight an old one.
18. Good character alone makes any man worthy of love.
19. If love diminishes, it quickly fails and rarely revives.
20. A man in love is always apprehensive.
21. Real jealousy always increases the feeling of love.
22. Jealousy, and therefore love, are increased when one suspects his beloved.
23. He whom the thought of love vexes, eats and sleeps very little.
24. Every act of a lover ends with in the thought of his beloved.
25. A true lover considers nothing good except what he thinks will please his beloved.
26. Love can deny nothing to love.
27. A lover can never have enough of the solaces of his beloved.
28. A slight presumption causes a lover to suspect his beloved.
29. A man who is vexed by too much passion usually does not love.
30. A true lover is constantly and without intermission possessed by the thought of his beloved.
31. Nothing forbids one woman being loved by two men or one man by two women.
**
I rather like these...
That explains my feelings. I was in love this whole time. I don't know if I agree with all of them, though...
I don't agree with all of it but I love history and IMO, this is a pretty cool snapshot of one individual's views on romantic love, during a time period when so-termed "courtly love" was becoming the fashion and was developing into its own ideas, ideals and rules. Indeed, it's all the more interesting to me because courtly love was not necessarily between married people but frequently was between an unmarried knight and his liege's woman (again, with specific rules). Coupled with the fact that marriage was definitely not FOR love, at least among the nobility/landholders (though a type of "love" was expected to develop after the marriage over the course of time), I found this quite sweet.
I really enjoyed this,I'm very antiquated and I agree with all the sentiments,I know the last person I was in love with I became wildly jealously never in any relationship/love interest had I ever felt the slightest jealousy so it was so strange to me and not a sign of insecurity but some sort of prized love.
from The Art of Courtly Love c. 1174 ADby Andreas Cappellanus
this thread is three years old, and I read this book twenty years ago. I'm sure I still have my copy in the study.
What I find is interesting food for thought, is how categorically opposed most these 12th century statements are, to the 2016 "PUA/alpha/hypergamy" advice is from the manosphere/blog mindshare today.
Quote:
Originally Posted by srjth
4. It is well known that love is always increasing or decreasing.
10. Love is always a stranger in the home of avarice.
14. The easy attainment of love makes it of little value; difficulty of attainment makes it prized.
15. Every lover regularly turns pale in the presence of his beloved.
19. If love diminishes, it quickly fails and rarely revives.
the above five most strongly resonnate within my life experience.
from The Art of Courtly Love c. 1174 ADby Andreas Cappellanus
1. Marriage is no real excuse for not loving
2. He who is not jealous cannot love
3. No one can be bound by a double love.
4. It is well known that love is always increasing or decreasing.
5. That which a lover takes against his will of his beloved has no relish.
6. Boys do not love until they arrive at the age of maturity.
7. When one lover dies, a widowhood of two years is required of the survivor.
8. No one should be deprived of love without the very best of reasons.
9. No one can love unless he is impelled by the persuasion of love.
10. Love is always a stranger in the home of avarice.
11. It is not proper to love any woman whom one should be ashamed to seek to marry.
12. A true lover does not desire to embrace in love anyone except his beloved.
13. When made public love rarely endures.
14. The easy attainment of love makes it of little value; difficulty of attainment makes it prized.
15. Every lover regularly turns pale in the presence of his beloved.
16. When a lover suddenly catches sight of his beloved his heart palpitates.
17. A new love puts to flight an old one.
18. Good character alone makes any man worthy of love.
19. If love diminishes, it quickly fails and rarely revives.
20. A man in love is always apprehensive.
21. Real jealousy always increases the feeling of love.
22. Jealousy, and therefore love, are increased when one suspects his beloved.
23. He whom the thought of love vexes, eats and sleeps very little.
24. Every act of a lover ends with in the thought of his beloved.
25. A true lover considers nothing good except what he thinks will please his beloved.
26. Love can deny nothing to love.
27. A lover can never have enough of the solaces of his beloved.
28. A slight presumption causes a lover to suspect his beloved.
29. A man who is vexed by too much passion usually does not love.
30. A true lover is constantly and without intermission possessed by the thought of his beloved.
31. Nothing forbids one woman being loved by two men or one man by two women.
this thread is three years old, and I read this book twenty years ago. I'm sure I still have my copy in the study.
What I find is interesting food for thought, is how categorically opposed most these 12th century statements are, to the 2016 "PUA/alpha/hypergamy" advice is from the manosphere/blog mindshare today.
the above five most strongly resonnate within my life experience.
When I answered this thread, it was coming up as a new thread... I believe it may have been merged later in the day with the older one.
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I believe it may have been merged later in the day with the older one.
