Spelling and grammar while Online Dating (reasons, aggressive, wear, money)

[Cyborgt800]

Originally Posted by Dr. Clean

worse... you won't get laid

I don't care...we'll spend much more time conversing than having sex. Plus, I want to make sure we're a good match above trying to impress anyone else with her looks!

Besides...getting laid is easy...finding the right partner, not so much!

If you're just worried about getting laid then you have much worse problems than worrying about their intelligence.

[Dr. Clean]

Originally Posted by Cyborgt800

I don't care...we'll spend much more time conversing than having sex. Plus, I want to make sure we're a good match above trying to impress anyone else with her looks!

Besides...getting laid is easy...finding the right partner, not so much!

If you're just worried about getting laid then you have much worse problems than worrying about their intelligence.

if you just want companionship, adopt a pet

[Cyborgt800]

Originally Posted by Cyborgt800
I don't care...we'll spend much more time conversing than having sex. Plus, I want to make sure we're a good match above trying to impress anyone else with her looks!

Besides...getting laid is easy...finding the right partner, not so much!

If you're just worried about getting laid then you have much worse problems than worrying about their intelligence.

Originally Posted by Dr. Clean

if you just want companionship, adopt a pet

WOW! Now, THAT'S a very mature and intelligent suggestion....now turn off the computer and finish your homework before mommy catches you on the net!

[stepka]

Originally Posted by stepka
No I did not need help--if I hadn't had a clue, how would I have spotted them in the first place? I studied for the test 3 years ago. Besides, I was not the one who laid into some random stranger on the internet for grammar mistakes as I'm pretty accepting of these things unless I see someone doing it first, as you did. This thread is about the importance of writing correctly! Truth is, this is a forum and I don't expect people to make themselves crazy over making sure every last word is spelled correctly and all apostrophes are in place because this is a place for the free exchange of ideas and I wouldn't like to think that someone who has something magnificent to say will be intimidated by lack of confidence in his/her English skills. Nice point! The whole gist of this thread is how one perceives another by their writings. Simple things like incorrect BASIC spelling, grammar and punctuation are much more irritating to most as opposed to the more complex rules of English. While a PHD in English Literature might be turned off by MY possessive apostrophe being missing, the majority of regular folk would not. They would however be turned off by someone's lack of correct contraction use. Further down the list would be less educated people just being turned off by text speech...while completely uneducated people might not be bothered by any kind of mistake. The second greatest poet in the English language, Yeats, was a horrible speller and what if someone had shamed him out of writing? If someone corrected him and it SHAMED him from further writing then he should be more ashamed of being a childishly weak person! One must master their trade!

Originally Posted by Cyborgt800

You see...it's all in degrees! While I might reject someone for not being able to spell, another might have rejected me for my missing possessive apostrophes. I'm okay with that!
What bothers me, more than someone who is ignorant, is someone intent on staying that way!

This thread is about what we all think about spelling and writing mistakes in those we're considering dating OL--not in each other. Just that--I'm no mind reader but I don't think JJ meant for us to go at each other's spelling and grammar mistakes and if you're that sensitive then perhaps you should find a place where people are perfect. Besides, my only point with you was that if you're going to give someone trouble about their mistakes, you'd better make sure your own writing is perfect. You have the internet at your fingertips after all so there's no excuse. If you can't make yours perfect, then don't give anyone else trouble. There is no ranking of writing mistakes and I'd say Yeats did master his trade.

[2mares]

Originally Posted by The Dissenter

Too busy trying to regulate hair, and passing zero tolerance policies for shaping pastry into guns.

True.

Originally Posted by Ruth4Truth

I can answer this. In the public high schools where I've taught, the English teachers have openly stated that teaching English grammar isn't their job; it's the job of the foreign language teachers. The schools don't believe in teaching grammar anymore. I don't know why. And I wonder if parents are aware of this, and if so, why aren't they doing anything about it.

Probably nothing. I'm not sure what the policy is in my school district. I would think teaching grammer would be very much a part of their job. When I was in school we were corrected and punished if need be for using incorrect grammer or country slang in class.

Originally Posted by Pikantari

I have to agree with them. It is to be taught much younger than in high school. By the time a student is in high school, these things needed to be cemented in their minds. Elementary school. Home.

It should be taught before highschool and reinforced throughout school. If parents dont know or use proper grammer how can they teach their children better. Isnt the point of public school to educate children because the majority of parents cant.

I stopped in a local store yesterday and the cashier asked if I wanted to make a donation to the childrens literacy fund. At first I didnt understand what she said so she explained the money went to help local children learn to read. I thoutht WTF are they being taught in school?

[OptimusPrime69]

Phrases like "I seen that movie" etc would kind of bother me in some instances. I think it depends on the context the incorrect grammar is being used....

In a formal setting such as work or first meetings with a person, I won't speak in a grammatically incorrect way. However, if I'm with friends, etc and we're just casually talking, joking, etc. I use all sorts of slang and incorrect grammar because it's appropriate. If that even makes sense?

I've noticed a lot of people say this too: "she be goin cray over dem drannks, naaah mean, brah?"
a lot of "be" instead of "is".... "he be like: awwww helll nah"

[Mooseketeer]

I must admit I do find some expressions or persistently bad spelling quite annoying but to be fair like most people I too am sometimes guilty .

Does it grate ? Yes. Am I always perfect and blameless in this respect however ? No.

There is nothing worse when it comes to language however though than to be corrected for your English by someone who is not quite beyond reproach....

Which is why I rarely bother to correct people unless they themselves have been aggressive in their criticism. I have for example been corrected on this forum by people for my English spelling ( rather than American) and I get a little irritated about it. I can usually spell words both ways but living in the UK now I choose to write UK English.



There is a difference between someone who makes the occasional mistake though and a serial mis-speller or grammatical Barbarian. We all commit verbal gaffs , some people however are committed and recidivist offenders.



Few people could claim to always have a perfect command of the language. Language is a fluid thing, we often become a little lazy and language changes and mutates. Also spoken language is quite different than written language and the two can blend into one when writing is becoming a little obsolete as it has in recent years.

I still write long letters, by hand but I think the advent of the text message, and email have to a certain extent ruined our potential for the art of epistolary prose. Most people seem to only be able to manage a couple of sentences these days, with no punctuation, no capital letters, and words become jumbled in the pursuit if expediency. Many people never read which also means they never learn to compose and structure a proper sentence.

The best way in my opinion to learn how to speak (and write) well is to read because the brain becomes attuned to the words and we instinctively remember certain compositions. The demise of reading in favour of audio-visual stimulation has certainly played a role in this sorry state of affair.

So yes it does bother me and I do bemoan the age of "proper" English ( and French, I am pretty sure most languages suffer from this modern affliction).


I still use cannot, will not, shall not and other seemingly archaic terms like television, telephone, automobile a lot and I know as soon as I have uttered them that I am being old fashioned and outdated in my usage of the English language. I have to force myself and change the way I was taught to speak English.


I am French so I can always play the ignorant foreigner anyway when it comes to spelling and grammar !

My ears do start hurting though when I hear things like : "They was", "We was", "It were" etc... We all all flawed but some people almost seem to pride themselves in mangling their Native tongue.


I wonder how many typos there are in my post now !! Please do not throw rotten tomatoes and do not look too closely at my punctuation ( a big weakness of mine !).

[kayanne]

Originally Posted by The Dissenter

If you want to disqualify a person over what I consider to be a small issue, have at it.

It wouldn't be a small issue to me. To me, it may be indicative of a lack of education and/or intelligence, a lack of caring about presenting one's self well. It very well may indicate that the person is not well read, perhaps not able to have intelligent, in-depth discussions of important issues, and does not surround him/herself by intelligent people. And before you bash me, note that I used words like "may" and "indicate." I am by no means saying there are not exceptions to my preconceived notions. But I personally preferred to date men (and married one) who could speak correctly.

I mean, really, "He don't know nothing about nobody"???? As others have said, an occasional slip is no big deal, but it would be wayyyy too annoying as an ongoing way of speaking.

BTW, my parents speak horribly---double negatives, ain't, and other things just as the OP described. My 3 brothers are marginally better than my parents. But somehow I grew up to be very aware of my grammar and spelling (thankfully!).

[akck]

Originally Posted by Pikantari

I have to agree with them. It is to be taught much younger than in high school. By the time a student is in high school, these things needed to be cemented in their minds. Elementary school. Home.

I agree it's not their job to have taught it, but it's there job to correct improper speech. I'm guessing someone who is learning English, would welcome correction because how else would they learn they're doing it wrong? Unfortunately for them, there's more than one way to say something correctly, which is confusing.

Also, to those who say they don't care about correct grammar. I'll bet it would be wearing on them if someone used incorrect grammar in every sentence they spoke. In some cases, it would almost be as if they were speaking a foreign language.

[Cyborgt800]

^^^^^^So your writing is perfect then, right?