Judging single parents based on their marital status

[Msmommy22]

I am feeling some type of way. Do you feel as though all young people with kids have multiple baby daddies? I am 22 I have 3 kids and they are all by the same guy. Is it my fault he wanted to have a family at one time then decided he wanted to go out and club, no..

[filihok]

Originally Posted by Msmommy22

I am feeling some type of way. Do you feel as though all young people with kids have multiple baby daddies? I am 22 I have 3 kids and they are all by the same guy. Is it my fault he wanted to have a family at one time then decided he wanted to go out and club, no..

It's your fault for not reading his mind or being omniscient.

Three kids by 22 though...

[Msmommy22]

Originally Posted by filihok

It's your fault for not reading his mind or being omniscient.

Three kids by 22 though...

Yea I know I kick myself in the butt everyday, trust me..he is older than me so not such a shocker for him..They are here now so all I can do is make the best of it

[Pikake]

I judge those who judge others.

[Idon'tdateyou]

Great points about widowed people and I have heard those stories. Sure there is no other living parent but that parent was there and depending on the age and situation might be a big issue. I knew someone who dated a widower with a teen daughter and it was very rough because the teen years can be horrible.

[Yellow Jacket]

Originally Posted by Msmommy22

Yea I know I kick myself in the butt everyday, trust me..he is older than me so not such a shocker for him..They are here now so all I can do is make the best of it

*facepalm* Don't fret I've seen worse. A lot worse.

[dr74]

Originally Posted by Idon'tdateyou

I know there have been many threads about dating single parents but am curious if their marital status has an effect on whether you change your mind. This topic came up on another site about how many younger people have multiple kids with different partners and whether one would date them.

I have a strong anti parent stance I mention often but what I rarely mention is I would date a dad who was either a widower or a dad by choice (as in his adopted as a single dad). Yes these men would have baggage (and the widower might have too much baggage depending on his late wife)but to me it would be acceptable because the ex wasn't in the picture (and in the case of the dad by choice there never was a woman in the picture). I wouldn't date divorced dads but do not judge them because things happen. However I do judge the men who have multiple baby mamas and these are guys I wouldn't even want to talk to as I would think so lowly of them. I would be thinking that they are obviously not the marrying type and no way would I want to be the new baby mama.

Hmmm…Interesting..I mean this, I did not state this as sarcasm…

So the widower would be someone you are more likely to date since there would be no drama? But you acknowledge that you realize that there would be some baggage?

Often times these are the hardest relationships to deal with since you are competing with a ghost…The relationship did not end the traditional way, it ended abruptly due to death…

I do respect your views on not dating men that are not only divorced…but married a couple of times…and having multiple children with different women..this is a red flag for me and I myself am a single mother…

I have stated several times on this forum and I will state it again…
I have been divorced since 2005..I am coming up on 8 years of being divorced…
In this time? Only (2) men have met my son…
I have taken care of myself ( Birth Control) so I do not become a statistic…I do not want more children if I am not in relationship with someone for a LONG time and know that It is leading somewhere ( Been there and done that)
So no..These single dads that have 3-4 kids that have different moms? Does not flow well with me…at all…

[Elained10]

Originally Posted by ja1myn

I would date a girl who had a kid who was widowed, but I wouldn't date a chick who was divorced with a kid. Too complicated for me. Don't want any of that baby daddy drama.

As I've said 5 million time not every single parent has drama from there ex! Some don't have any at all

[Idon'tdateyou]

I'll be honest and state it would depend on the widower. I would worry about competiting so to speak with the deceased wife so it be something I would look at closer in depth. Never been in that situation though so not sure what I would do. I still stronger prefer childless men though.