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Because I'm "ugly yet sweet" I deserve all those hot girls rather than setting my sights on someone who is actually into me. They are obligated to me, for my superficial niceness.
In retrospect, yes.
You go run around and ask out as many women as possible until one likes your looks OR gives you a chance and that's how it is done while limiting your investment and saying bye-bye after the first no.
But the mistake that a lot of guys make is thinking that being kind and supportive to a woman will MAKE HER ATTRACTED.
Personality is bull****. If your looks don't support your personality, society will essentially tell you your personality is not acceptable based on the way you look, and you'll be forced to adapt a meek and invisible position in society. That's the life of a beta....
I don't believe in the pristine image of women. I believe that the world is made up of individuals and not 2 genders that all act and think in the same exact way. There are some horrible women out there. But simply having common genitalia doesn't make people attracted or not attracted to the same thing. If that were so - we would all look the same and have the same personalities because only people who all looked and thought one way would be mating.
I also think that calling men "beta" as an insult is not very nice.
well i found it interesting that you took no issue with my opinion on 'nice guys', but made a deal out of something you interpreted that wasn't there on women. that's all I'm saying, although you kind of addressed it in this post
People don't have to like the alpha/beta label, it accurately describes young dating life; especially the club and bar scenes
I don't believe in the pristine image of women. I believe that the world is made up of individuals and not 2 genders that all act and think in the same exact way. There are some horrible women out there. But simply having common genitalia doesn't make people attracted or not attracted to the same thing. If that were so - we would all look the same and have the same personalities because only people who all looked and thought one way would be mating.
I also think that calling men "beta" as an insult is not very nice.
That is true and something even I need to be reminded of every now and then.
But it has been shocking to me in my life how many 'nice' women have flocked to the feet of good looking jerks. I mean some of these guys were/are serious jerks. I mean if you had asked me when I was 20, I would not have expected those results.
It's easy to let the negative out when somebody posts a thread like this because I've seen a lot of negative. Then, you remind me that not all women are like that. Etc, etc. But even the women who don't chase after the good looking jerks need a certain minimum level of looks.
well i found it interesting that you took no issue with my opinion on 'nice guys', but made a deal out of something you interpreted (that wasn't there) on women. that's all I'm saying, although you kind of addressed it in this post
People don't have to like the alpha/beta label, it accurately describes young dating life; especially the club and bar scenes
So - who are you implying is deciding that attractive guys have good personalities no matter what and ugly guys aren't worth a dime no matter what? It's not women? Who is it?
People don't like the alpha/beta labels because they are pretty much used to either thump your chest or put others down. Most mature, confident people don't feel the need to do either one of those things.
It's a defense mechanism to protect the ego by projecting negative moral values on more successful guys. So unless being judgemental and envious are nice guy qualities, they're phony. I cringe every time a guy complains about being a nice guy who's never given a chance, because he comes across as extremely emasculating and sad.
The proper term for these guys is beta.
Woman talk.....
"Your such a nice Guy" = "I have ZERO desire to have sex with you."
That is true and something even I need to be reminded of every now and then.
But it has been shocking to me in my life how many 'nice' women have flocked to the feet of good looking jerks. I mean some of these guys were/are serious jerks. I mean if you had asked me when I was 20, I would not have expected those results.
It's easy to let the negative out when somebody posts a thread like this because I've seen a lot of negative. Then, you remind me that not all women are like that. Etc, etc. But even the women who don't chase after the good looking jerks need a certain minimum level of looks.
So, how attractive are all these women that you are basing this on?
People who are looking for happiness in a relationship look for the total package. I know guys that are not good looking who are in wonderful relationships. The two shorter guys that I dated are both happily married to attractive women that are taller than them. If you focus on the negative - that's all you'll see.
These guys are extremely nice because they're afraid of getting a negative reaction, so they adapt a people pleasing personality to avoid the rejection. It's niceness borne out of insecurity, not genuine, and girls can sense that.
Quote:
Because I'm "ugly yet sweet" I deserve all those hot girls rather than setting my sights on someone who is actually into me. They are obligated to me, for my superficial niceness.
These are both true. Nice guys are sometimes (but not always) creeps. And sometimes (but not always) insecure.
1. Recognizing it's up to both of you to make it work, and it's about letting choices actually happen.
2. Recognizing that you are at heart, possibly afraid of being told you aren't good enough.
When you vocalize these things in a relationship, you might find you are actually more attractive to the opposite sex than simple appearance or posturing would give you.
So - who are you implying is deciding that attractive guys have good personalities no matter what and ugly guys aren't worth a dime no matter what? It's not women? Who is it?
People don't like the alpha/beta labels because they are pretty much used to either thump your chest or put others down. Most mature, confident people don't feel the need to do either one of those things.
I don't understand your first question
And i'm only remarking on the way things work from what I've seen. Betas have worth in the non-dating world, and I suppose as providers
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