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I'm going to have to disagree. I think there's a reasonable assumption of privacy when you send an email to "Cathy" and not to "Cathy and Steve". I think there's a reasonable assumption of privacy when the initial email explains that this is something I'm keeping very hush-hush, and only my doctor, best friend, and now my sister know.
If she had ever said "By the way, Steve has access to this account" or "Can I tell Steve?" I'd feel a bit differently.
I'm also still quite upset with him -- he chose to read a multiple-email long discussion rather than averting his eyes when he realized it was something quite personal and intimate...and something none of his business. (I think there were at least 10-12 emails in that thread.) That was extremely inappropriate on his part.
By the way... the reason I know he knows is because he thought it was appropriate to ask me about it . . . in front of some of their friends.
It's on her. And it's on him. Ego has nothing to do with it, and I'm astonished that you think jt does. She has demonstrated she is not capable of protecting my privacy or my secrets. This is the path she's chosen. I have chosen a different path.
Oh man. That is horrible. I would hope, that any SO that decides to read a private email like that, has the respect and common sense NOT to discuss it with anyone but me...and that includes the sender. How clueless can the guy be, to not only ask you about it, but to do it in front of people?
We I only have joint accounts so that's not an issue.
Yeah, I wish that would work but...
We have one joint account, her personal account, my personal account ( both are accessible for both ) however, I had to get another personal account in a different bank w/out her being able to access. Sad huh?
Only got the other account because I kept noticing money missing out of my personal account. She would say, "We'll, I needed gas!" ( never asked, just helped her self)
On the other hand, some of my friends have joint email accounts with their husbands, and this is a bit off putting, I think. IF I want to talk about something personal, it could be a negative.
If I want to discuss something personal with a friend, I do it face-to-face. I don't ever discuss private matters via e-mail. I assume e-mail correspondence is public and use it accordingly.
If I want to discuss something personal with a friend, I do it face-to-face. I don't ever discuss private matters via e-mail. I assume e-mail correspondence is public and use it accordingly.
In some ways, that's even worse. What if the person blabs to their spouse? Then the ol' game of Telephone comes into play, where they may report/repeat it inaccurately.
And then of course, if the spouse then goes and blabs to whoever in the social circle, the "friend" you confided in can deny ever even knowing in the first place, so you can't prove the leak. It happens.
If something is so sensitive that you feel anxious it may become public fodder, the solution is to keep quiet about it. No e-mail, no phone calls, no face-to-face, no communication whatsoever. In the corporate world, e-mail is one of the least secure methods of communication. All sorts of people have access to it, and not understanding this has come back to bite many incredibly naive employees who thought their e-mail was safe from prying eyes. As a rule, it's most prudent not to put anything that you want to remain private in an e-mail, and that's true in both an individual's personal and professional life.
If something is that sensitive and you feel anxious that it may become public fodder, the solution is to keep quiet about it. No e-mail, no phone calls, no face-to-face, no communication whatsoever. In the corporate world, e-mail is one of the least secure methods of communication. All sorts of people have access to it, and not understanding this has come back to bite many incredibly naive employees who thought their e-mail was safe from prying eyes. As a rule, it's most prudent not to put anything that you want to remain private in an e-mail, and that's true in both an individual's personal and professional life.
How nice it must be, to have no troubles and never to need a friend to talk to. May I ask what kind of robotic utopia you live in? And who your programmer was?
Of course I talk to my friends about private matters, but I do it face-to-face. I stand by my point that if you do not feel comfortable sharing something with someone in person because it is that sensitive, the solution is not to put it in e-mail, because e-mail is not a secure mode of communication, and it never has been. I'm not trying to be argumentative here; I'm trying to help you understand the vulnerabilities of e-mail.
I do talk to my friends about private matters, but I do it face-to-face. I stand by my point that if you do not feel comfortable sharing something with another person in person because it is that sensitive, the solution is not to put it in e-mail, because e-mail is not a secure mode of communication, and it never has been.
That is not what you said. You said no calls, no face-to-face, no communication whatsoever. That is the point I am criticizing.
That is not what you said. You said no calls, no face-to-face, no communication whatsoever. That is the point I am criticizing.
Read it again: I said that if something is so sensitive that you feel anxious it may become public fodder, the solution is to keep quiet about it. No e-mail, no phone calls, no face-to-face, no communication whatsoever.
Here's the theory. You should not have anything to hide.
I believe in respecting people's privacy. You know who you are dealing with if you pay attention to people. A dishonest and cheating person shows the behavior. People always show you who they are and their character.
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