He wants to help me financially and I dont know what to do

[Katnan]

I find it appalling that you do not have enough money for school, and instead of taking a year off to work to save for this known shortfall, or get a side job, you think others should fund your way.

I'd hate to see the strings that come with the money he's offering, or in two months when the honeymoon period has worn off and you discover you don't really like him, yet gladly took his money.

[randomparent]

I think it's a mistake to take money for school from a love interest. It complicates the relationship, and I think you'll feel better about yourself of you work this out on your own.

[Suncc49]

Originally Posted by oh-eve

So you don't work, already have a degree, just go to school and let others pay for your life? Yes, you are absolutely right, it doesn't sound fair.

Get a job like everybody else. I work full time, go to school fulltime and still have enough time for hobbies. If I can do it, you can do it easily.

This ^

[cpg35223]

Originally Posted by brooklyn1234

I met my amazing boyfriend 3 and a half months ago, and we have a really great thing going on. I feel very differently about him than I have about anyone I have dated in the past, and he feels the same. I'm 27, but am a student still, finishing up a second degree. He works, doesn't make a ton of money, but has a good amount of money saved (~31k) and a lot of money invested. I've been living off a scholarship the last few months which had me tightly budgeted, but it was doable. Due to some bureaucratic issues I won't be receiving my next scholarship check until 8 weeks later than I expected. I'm broke. At the same time, I have a $4000 outstanding tuition bill that my scholarship does not cover that I have to find a way to pay. My boyfriend knows that I've been super stressed out trying to figure out what to do, and he keeps offering to help me financially, but I'm having a LOT of trouble accepting his help. I know that he's only offering because he cares, but I cant help but to feel guilty taking anything from him. On top of that he keeps paying for everything whenever we go out or do anything, and even though I tell him how grateful I am constantly I still feel guilty that I'm not contributing more.

Today I decided to put together one of those crowdfunding websites to see if I could raise any money toward my tuition, and I've managed to raise nearly $1,000 in a few hours- needless to say I have great friends. Problem is I don't know what to say to my boyfriend. I don't want him to feel bad that he offered to help me out dozens of times and I turned him down only to turn to friends/the general public. I just don't want money to somehow come between us, and I worry that it would if I took any from him.

What would you do in a situation like this?

I'd avoid owing the BF money at all costs. Borrow from your folks if at all possible. Because money and romantic relationships just don't mix. Money is power, and a person who lends you money has power over you. That keeps you from having autonomy if events in the relationship demand it.

[RedZin]

You haven't been in this relationship long enough to be borrowing money from this man.

If you two had been dating for a year and/or this shortfall was totally unexpected, borrowing from him would be appropriate.

You are an independent student. Is this another bachelor's degree or a grad school degree? Why are you not taking out PLUS loans? They will cover tuition.

Odd.

[JanND]

Borrow a student loan. Do not borrow from your boyfriend.....it will change your relationship into a business situation. Let him pay for dates, but do not borrow money.

[Bernie6408]

Originally Posted by ashleynj

Get a job part time if you are short on cash. If you have time for a boyfriend, you have time for a part time job.

For real!