He wants to help me financially and I dont know what to do (boyfriends, how to)
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
I met my amazing boyfriend 3 and a half months ago, and we have a really great thing going on. I feel very differently about him than I have about anyone I have dated in the past, and he feels the same. I'm 27, but am a student still, finishing up a second degree. He works, doesn't make a ton of money, but has a good amount of money saved (~31k) and a lot of money invested. I've been living off a scholarship the last few months which had me tightly budgeted, but it was doable. Due to some bureaucratic issues I won't be receiving my next scholarship check until 8 weeks later than I expected. I'm broke. At the same time, I have a $4000 outstanding tuition bill that my scholarship does not cover that I have to find a way to pay. My boyfriend knows that I've been super stressed out trying to figure out what to do, and he keeps offering to help me financially, but I'm having a LOT of trouble accepting his help. I know that he's only offering because he cares, but I cant help but to feel guilty taking anything from him. On top of that he keeps paying for everything whenever we go out or do anything, and even though I tell him how grateful I am constantly I still feel guilty that I'm not contributing more.
Today I decided to put together one of those crowdfunding websites to see if I could raise any money toward my tuition, and I've managed to raise nearly $1,000 in a few hours- needless to say I have great friends. Problem is I don't know what to say to my boyfriend. I don't want him to feel bad that he offered to help me out dozens of times and I turned him down only to turn to friends/the general public. I just don't want money to somehow come between us, and I worry that it would if I took any from him.
I would suggest he lends you the money, so you are able to better concentrate on your study and later you pay it back.
You both sign a written contract and sign it in the presence of witnesses. You may pay the money back when you are more financially stable. I would not take it as a gift!
Do you think your boyfriend is a dumb person? My guess is no. So trust him. If a guy knows how to invest, he is somewhat smart and know what he is doing. If you are not a worthy person, I don't believe he would choose to stay with you or help you out financially.
I have been helped by two of my ex boyfriends. The first time he helped me to start a business. The second time, my ex helped me raising money to start another business. Both time I have proven them that they made the right decision. I paid them back and the relationships got stronger because of the experiences.
If you know you can pay him back on time, go for it. You can even offer a little bit of interest. The bottom line is that you need to keep your words.
Are you saying the money will come through for you, but it will be too late to pay this $4000 bill? Take him up on his offer, but tell him you only need $3000, and you'll pay it back when it comes in. Be upfront about how you felt bad about taking such a big amount from him, so you did some fundraising with your friends, so you only need $3000. (He'll probably see this as a good sign, that you're not just out to take advantage of him for his $$, and you're resourceful.) Then pay him back when the money comes in. If any extra comes in from the crowdfunding (you should close that account), put it into savings, for the next emergency.
Well. Nice dragging that up. This is a different guy. One that I didn't make all of the mistakes that I made with that one with. We met a few weeks after I ended things with that guy. Who by the way stalked me and I have an order of protection against.
If the money is coming, then I would feel okay about accepting a loan knowing I could pay him back in a few weeks time. You could even write up something stating this is only a loan and you are paying it back on whatever date. To be honest, I would feel a lot better about accepting a loan from my boyfriend than hitting up my family and friends on one of those websites.
I also think 3 months of being together is too soon to borrow a large sum of money from a significant other.
Call your friend Sallie Mae.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
