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It is impressive, this is stupid to say. And I hope her new friend works out.
All this rape scare is f'd up. Are you saying she's going to get beat up and done with a gun to her head? I think she's smart enough to gauge if the guy she is making out with could do this and otherwise not party with high school drop outs in a dive bar in po dunk USA.
If she is partying with the losers maybe she should go find some nerd parties to go to.
I think you are missing how sensitive the word rape really is. Most of us aren't saying from a standpoint of he's going to tear her clothes off, force her down, and rape her like the general term. Rape can be claimed as easy as she was onboard to mess around with a guy. One thing leads to another and they are having sex, and she clears her thoughts and wants the guy to stop, but he doesn't. You are now in the grey area of rape. It's not always about brutality and overpowering someone. Sometimes it can just be a situation that started out with clear intentions and then someone changed their mind during the act.
I think you are missing how sensitive the word rape really is. Most of us aren't saying from a standpoint of he's going to tear her clothes off, force her down, and rape her like the general term. Rape can be claimed as easy as she was onboard to mess around with a guy. One thing leads to another and they are having sex, and she clears her thoughts and wants the guy to stop, but he doesn't. You are now in the grey area of rape. It's not always about brutality and overpowering someone. Sometimes it can just be a situation that started out with clear intentions and then someone changed their mind during the act.
So effectively accidentally having sex is rape? Under this definition it's possible the guy didn't even know.
How does one get raped without over powering happening? I can only imagine, claiming rape without overpowering is an insult to those who had a gun to their head.
I've seen people here say as a guy always push for it. That would clearly eventually create one of these accidental rape scenarios.
So all the guys who are nice and don't just assert it are losers and those who do are guaranteed eventual rapists and we then guilt the men for a rape culture? And I have to be treated like an a**hole when I'm not?
Last edited by OvernightDelivery; 11-04-2014 at 09:30 AM..
So effectively accidentally having sex is rape? Under this definition it's possible the guy didn't even know.
Date rape is very common. Do you know what it is? It's when the guy you are with decides he wants to have sex with you without your consent. You could be drunk and nearly passed out, or simply in a physical position where you can't resist because he is stronger. Young women often do not fight back after saying no and resisting, they close their eyes and hope it's over soon. In their minds they blame themselves and do not report the assault.
Date rape statistics are not gathered from the authorities. They are gathered from young women who have endured it, and who have likely ever told anyone else. And the men who do it usually do not recognize what they did as rape or assault.
I was one of those who fought back and did not get raped. And yes, I had unwisely invited a man I barely knew into my living room to make out. The next day he came by with flowers and apology for trying to "take things too far." He blamed the language barrier (he was French). But really when you are screaming NO and hitting a guy and he doesn't stop, that is no misunderstanding.
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Quote:
Originally Posted by OvernightDelivery
How does one get raped without over powering happening? I can only imagine, claiming rape without overpowering is an insult to those who had a gun to their head.
They say no and you keep going.
They cannot give consent.
You don't have much of an imagination and your statement is pretty ignorant and insulting to the many victims of sexual assault out there. MOST sexual assault and rape don't involve a gun or overpowering physical force.
You don't have much of an imagination and your statement is pretty ignorant and insulting to the many victims of sexual assault out there. MOST sexual assault and rape don't involve a gun or overpowering physical force.
Absolutely. That's why you have to be careful with sex in college. Most men and women in college just want to have fun. They go to a party, have some drinks, make out and foolishly take them home. As a male, if both of us have been drinking, and I'm invited to your place or my place, sex is going to be the first thing on my mind. For her it may not be sex, but some making out, but she's not totally oppossed to sex either. One thing leads to another and maybe she's having sex with a guy who's too big or too aggressive for her taste. She says to please stop, but he keeps going. It doesn't mean that he's going forcefully like we see in movies, but he thinks she's enjoying it or misunderstands her.
Obviously these don't get reported, because she was likely onboard for sex. There was just something about the sexual act with that person that she didn't enjoy and then she gathered her thoughts and wanted it to stop. This happens way more than people think.
You don't have much of an imagination and your statement is pretty ignorant and insulting to the many victims of sexual assault out there. MOST sexual assault and rape don't involve a gun or overpowering physical force.
I don't rape or know any rapists. If you say no and it keeps going on that's overpowering. Otherwise no no, kick back, etc, means it's possible the guy didn't even know.
Ultimately we don't know what kind of crowd she is hanging out with so this blanket all you're going to be forcibly raped is insulting. Both to men in general and her intelligence imo.
Ultimately we don't know what kind of crowd she is hanging out with so this blanket all you're going to be forcibly raped is insulting. Both to men in general and her intelligence imo.
Once you have sex for the first time you will understand the mechanics of it all and how lines can be crossed when the urge is primal. Some men let themselves get out of hand and ignore everything else around them. This is why sex with strangers has to involve undeniable consent and a measure of self control. Relationship sex, not so much.
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