so there's this guy.. (wives, girlfriends, how to, marriages)

[Mikala43]

Originally Posted by Ace_TX

even looking here on c-d you'll see women posting about some married guy and how they want them... you all should be ashamed of yourselves...

No, she should be ashamed of HERSELF. The rest of us have nothing to do with it.

[CSD610]

Originally Posted by Meadow3

OK, I'm leaving out a lot. My husband and I are complete opposites.

The way this guy is, his views,the wayhe dresses, his sense of humor plus he's gorgeous. We just clicked.
Yes Auraliea, youre right, as a married woman, I'm wrong for developing this a crush on this guy.

snugglegirl05 thanks for sharing your story. And of course, before I was to even start or think about a relationship with someone else, I would have to divorce my husband.

While some say I emotionally cheated on my husband already, I dont think i would physically cheat.

There are people out there who do a lot worse in a marriage that is a lot better than mine.

Too late, you have already crossed that line so what sort of justification is next?
Also, if you and your husband were that opposite why did you get married in the first place?

I am going to stress that it does not matter what the non boyfriend boyfriend has done or why he has done it; you need to do one of two things, you need to work on your marriage and put as much effort into it as you have the non boyfriend I'm so smitten we wear the same ripped jeans have piercings and everything boyfriend

OR

You need to legally end your current marriage and at least give our husband a chance to find someone who really does love him, respect him and won't cheat on him emotionally or otherwise.

[westcoast_CA]

OP its like this. The guy came to understand that if a woman who is married while wanting to develop a relationship with him , nothing in the world would do to stop her from doing the same if he got together with that woman.

And that woman is you, so he has chosen to play safe. And so would I .

[rrah]

FYI--OP emotional cheating is cheating. That emotion that could have been used to repair your marriage was taken away and focused on another relationship. You can justify it all you want, but you have and are cheating as long as you are married and remain in contact with this man.

[troymclure]

Obviously, you should leave your husband and run off with this guy.

Only good things can happen.

[Meadow3]

I understand that emotional cheating is cheating regardless. My marriage has been in shambles long before this. My husband has done his fair share of talking to his exes, or talking to other women, hanging out with female co -workers. All the while I either denied it or accepted it .

As far as I know, hehas never actually physically cheated but wanting to knw how exes were doing and actually calling one up , I'd say that was emotionally cheating too.

I'm not saying this to justify anything or to shift blame or to look for sympathy. I didn't know that talking to this guy for the past year would develop into this crush, I mean, i have genuine feelings for this guy. I never chased him or threw myself at him. We would just have these deep conversations about everything under the sun -and moon and in the process, feelings developed.

Maybe I live under a shell, but I dont really have these deep.conversations thru text or Skype that would go on thru the night. With everyone of my friends. He, he was different.

I'm not ashamed of myself to have these feelings for him. Maybe if I was married to a really nice guy i would feel guilty or ashamed. I don't feel ashamed or guilty or any negative feeling one should feel for letting myself like this guy.

It happens. Its human nature. I have a huge disconnect with my husband and this guy filled a void. I feel bad that my crush may think he was dispensable..and therefore ignoring me or whatever he is doing with these unread messages. in the past 4 months i sent him 3 messages. im not chasing after him. I never told him i like him nor did he tell me. in this case our actions spoke for themselves.

But this has been an eye opener that theres a tremendous void in my life.

thank you to all who replied.

[zentropa]

So, to reiterate, you've never actually met him.

[Mikala43]

A better title would have been "there was this guy...."

Because for whatever reason, he's not talking to you anymore.

[Meadow3]

No zentropa we never met. Like almost a month before he was going to be nearby,he was like kinda hinting at hanging out. I told him that it would be awesome. And that was that. Then the whole mysterious blocking and unfriending happened right before his trip. I never questioned why i was blocked and unfriended.. I just was like ..hmm ok. It seemed strange

The day he was still nearby but at the airport or something waiting to leave was the day he sends me a friend request and explains how the website made some error. I was like that's pretty weird. And I didn't bring up seeing him even though he was at the airport waiting for his flight later on that day.

Mikala43, I know right? "Was" Thats the better word for this situation. I have no idea why he won't talk to me other than the reasons i mentioned. I mean, not even a "happy thanksgiving to you too" ? ..but he stays my friend on social media.No idea. I admit, om confused.

I don't want to ask y hes not talking to me either or why he has read the messages I have sent ,then marks the.m unread. very strange coming from him but at the same time I respect his space because it looks like that's what he wants. the answer my friends told me to that was that, "if i see them read, and no response, i might think he doesnt want to talk to me anymore, but hes pushing u away because he likes u, and will get back to me when he feels ready" who knows.

[Djuna]

Some people are just too dense to truly get it.