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My first girlfriend (from way back) invited me (and my current girlfriend) to her wedding. We said yes. I later found out that my school's alumni reunion will be taking place on the same day. I am a lot more keen on the reunion than the wedding. The wedding in church is at 4 pm and the party is at 6 pm. I would make it to the alumni event if we went to the party at 6 pm only. Is this socially acceptable?
Nope that's tacky. It says hey I want the free food but I can't be bothered to come and witness the actual event that I'm here celebrating. Choose one or the other, but you can't have both.
Technically it is tacky like others said. The best way I can think of to handle this is to tell your friend you can't make it because another commitment has you tied up until 6pm. Then leave it to him to say, "come to the reception anyway." If he doesn't say that, send a card and a gift with well wishes.
It's tacky, but it's also possible that you'll slip in unnoticed.
Just showing up for the food/booze is generally socially inappropriate.
Quote:
Originally Posted by strawberrykiki
Nope that's tacky. It says hey I want the free food but I can't be bothered to come and witness the actual event that I'm here celebrating. Choose one or the other, but you can't have both.
I agree it's the height of tacky, although I wish I could get away with it. j/k. I don't care for wedding and funerals, but we have to do what we have to do.
The party is to thank the guests who gathered to witness this milestone. The ceremony is the much more important event.
Also, accepting an invitation and then backing out is considered rude. There's a continuum from a casual, last-minute meetup to formal invitations with weeks or months of notice. There's also a continuum of excuses with things like "my appendix burst yesterday" being typically acceptable and "sorry, something better came up" being way down there.
How good is this friend? Do you know both of them well? Will anyone notice you are not there? Tread as you will, but it IS rude.
Location: RI, MA, VT, WI, IL, CA, IN (that one sucked), KY
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Quote:
Originally Posted by BellaLind
Technically it is tacky like others said. The best way I can think of to handle this is to tell your friend you can't make it because another commitment has you tied up until 6pm. Then leave it to him to say, "come to the reception anyway." If he doesn't say that, send a card and a gift with well wishes.
Good plan
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j/k. I don't care for wedding and funerals, but we have to do what we have to do. 
