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80% of the time my husband doesn't forget to keep me from grabbing the remote control first.
Darn it.
Wait. MY GOD, IT'S TRUE...it's all true.
..... Shes here all week folks
Quote:
Originally Posted by Prince_Frog
The OP has even said that he hasn't dated in a really long time, so how can he even say "Relationships suck" when he can't even find a woman that will date him?
LOL yeah good point mate
I think I know why ( as I'm sure we all know why )
It sounds like something my 10-year-old would say as a dramatic urban legend.
OP, as intelligent, deep and interesting as you are, you KNOW what your problems are. Please don't be disingenuous continuing to bring up new threads like this one. You know you're on the antisocial side, live financially very close to the vest/semi-off the grid which naturally is going to eliminate a certain percentage of women (well, all people...how about friends, guy friends? Do you have those? You don't mention any), generally don't go out except at night, and refuse to smile in your photos/wear bandannas and carry weapons with a glare on your face in photos. You know you have anxiety and you may have depression. Fix those - stop looking for reasons outside yourself. You already know what needs to be fixed even just for your own happiness, much less bringing a second person into the equation.
Antisocial should not hinder relationships if I treat her well, I may live close to the vest but I take care of my bill's and ask nobody else to, and life has shown me that for the most part other men are the enemy. and there are 2 reasons for my hatred/fear of the sun.
1. I have always had light sensitivity I have nothing in my house brighter than a 40-watt bulb or I am seeing spots.
2. the sun does awful things to my skin. an hour in the sun and I go from a nice will smith/ LL cool J complexion to entering Wesley Snipes territory. and so being out in the daylight is not worth low self esteem and snow-blindness that would ensue. a pair of shades helps a little but I sweet sunscreen off in minutes.
The smiling thing I have tried, I can never seem to be able to smile and get my jawline right.
The sword is part of my, been into martial arts since childhood mostly Thai boxing and Japanese fencing.. plus I thought it looked badass and inspire the protector instinct maybe I was wrong.
During the honeymoon phase of the relationships anxiety and depression usually does not show it's self until the one I'm in said relationship start to cool off from the relationship high.
Do you really think one can be happy having to change everything they are to find someone?
Antisocial should not hinder relationships if I treat her well, I may live close to the vest but I take care of my bill's and ask nobody else to, and life has shown me that for the most part other men are the enemy. and there are 2 reasons for my hatred/fear of the sun.
1. I have always had light sensitivity I have nothing in my house brighter than a 40-watt bulb or I am seeing spots.
2. the sun does awful things to my skin. an hour in the sun and I go from a nice will smith/ LL cool J complexion to entering Wesley Snipes territory. and so being out in the daylight is not worth low self esteem and snow-blindness that would ensue. a pair of shades helps a little but I sweet sunscreen off in minutes.
The smiling thing I have tried, I can never seem to be able to smile and get my jawline right.
The sword is part of my, been into martial arts since childhood mostly Thai boxing and Japanese fencing.. plus I thought it looked badass and inspire the protector instinct maybe I was wrong.
During the honeymoon phase of the relationships anxiety and depression usually does not show it's self until the one I'm in said relationship start to cool off from the relationship high.
Do you really think one can be happy having to change everything they are to find someone?
if she doesn't see you or you don't make the effort and take her out socially then that WILL only hinder any relationship mate
The seconded bolded you are actually correct you shouldn't HAVE to dramatically change who you are as such except only a few tweaks maybe.... But it all depends on how much you actually want to change or not mate?
I haven't been on C-D for very long but I have read your other posts OP. I honestly think you don't want to find anyone, that way you can continue being miserable and complaining here so you can get your much needed sympathy and pity.
It was very difficult for me to find someone as well, but I didn't whine about it constantly online. Only you can figure out why you can't keep a relationship, unfortunately none of us have crystal balls.
I haven't been on C-D for very long but I have read your other posts OP. I honestly think you don't want to find anyone, that way you can continue being miserable and complaining here so you can get your much needed sympathy and pity.
It was very difficult for me to find someone as well, but I didn't whine about it constantly online. Only you can figure out why you can't keep a relationship, unfortunately none of us have crystal balls.
During those times I am in a relationship I am not here complaining because during those rare wonderful times I have nothing to complain about.
During the honeymoon phase of the relationships anxiety and depression usually does not show it's self until the one I'm in said relationship start to cool off from the relationship high.
Do you really think one can be happy having to change everything they are to find someone?
It's not about changing everything you are. It's about healing from whatever cr@p you may have had to endure in the past, so you won't have the anxiety and depression. And btw, anxiety along w/depression can be symptoms of unresolved Post-Traumatic Stress--your system deep down is stuck in fight-or-flight mode, thus creating chronic anxiety. Or it's an indication of something else fairly heavy-duty. Just saying.
If someone were depressed and miserable, and couldn't get out of their funk to enjoy life or get out of their dead-end job, would you say, "Don't let anyone tell you you have to change who you are!" You'd want them to be stuck in that headspace for the rest of their life, doomed? No. Finding your way to a happy, or at least--contented, space isn't "changing who you are". It's giving you the opportunity to be all the youthat you can be: reaching your full potential as a human being in all areas of life.
But--who are we? Just some anonymous voices on the internet. Why listen to us? Oh, right; you didn't come here to listen, you came here to rant and "enlighten" us with your insight on relationships
. You should have enough experience here by now to know that doesn't work; your rant will be challenged. Have a nice day.
Last edited by Ruth4Truth; 08-07-2016 at 03:35 PM..
During those times I am in a relationship I am not here complaining because during those rare wonderful times I have nothing to complain about.
You completely missed my point but it doesn't matter, you're just going to keep making these ridiculous threads. Oh well, maybe you'll finally take someone's advice or not and continue being miserable.
You completely missed my point but it doesn't matter, you're just going to keep making these ridiculous threads. Oh well, maybe you'll finally take someone's advice or not and continue being miserable.
No I don't want to be depressed and miserable, I want to enjoy my life as is only with someone to share it with.
The premise of the 80/20 rule is that you will never get more than 80% of what you want in a partner, the 80/20 rule is why many cheat and why many have a fear of commitment.
Examples:
"she is a great mother to my children,beautiful, keeps herself in shape and runs the household perfectly, but she only want's to have sex twice a week"
or
"he is a great guys, funny. charming, attractive, great lover, is faithful, hut he is broke, lives in a studio apartment and rides the bus to his dish washing job at Denny's"
In a perfect world the 20% you don't like consists of things like "she has bad morning breath because of her low carb diet that keeps her slim and toned" or "he keeps leaving the toilet seat up." you stuff that looks small in the bigger picture.
How are "20%" and "80%" even quantifiable? In your examples, you equate a mismatched sex drive with bad breath. Is "only wants sex 2x a week" measurable as 20% of some nebulous 100% (as if it even existed, which it doesn't), when compared to being a beautiful, devoted mother and wife?
OP, I think you're just deeply discouraged and frustrated.
If I were you, I try to understand why not dating/not being a relationship affects you so much to point of constantly trying to understand why relationships suck and why you feel the need to come up with so many different theories.
Agreed!
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..... Shes here all week folks 
)
