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Only when they are feeling very desperate do they do this. It's a war of attrition that men will always have the upper hand in. We can choose deny women our attention even if they pull out all the stops and quit wearing clothes in public. The fish has to want to bite the hook.
I admit I can be picky as well hence why I rarely approach women unless I know her real well. If a woman isn't making eye contact with me I assume she doesn't want to be approached.
She may be referring to "orbiting"; standing around in the close vicinity of a guy, hoping he notices and makes a move. But women approach directly, too; they just may not make it super-clear it's an approach. They may try to initiate a conversation, which gesture the guy may only see as friendliness. OTOH, if the women is seriously interested in the guy, she'll be more obvious. If her first pass doesn't work, she'll come back, and will try again in a more obvious way.
Yeah orbiting isn't going to make me find a woman attractive. It'll make me wonder what's wrong with her and why she is doing that. Either open your mouth and say something or go do something else. That's a prime example of a woman being creepy.
lol FINALLY one admits that guys are picky, and that men do have the upper hand, by being picky about whom they choose to approach. It only took, what--4 years of debate on this forum to get to the point that a man admitted this? Why is it so hard for guys to agree with this?
I'm not sure we're agreeing on the same point, but whatever.
The default position of women is to polish and display, then process the applications that roll in. Not go bang on doors and drum up business. If anything is going to happen the man has to get off his a*s and do something, which is kind of how the world works in general. If you're waiting for her to get off her a*s to go mow the lawn, change the starter in a truck, or initiate a relationship you're going to be waiting a long time. "That's a man's job" is what she would say. And so it is.
Good to see I'm not the only one who finds women 'orbiting' annoying. And yes,we as men can tell when they're doing it. It's almost arrogant; 'I'm going to make sure he sees me. All he has to do is see me, and he'll say something to me, I'm that hot'.
I don't mind a woman coming up with something to say, no matter how mundane, to get your attention--asking for the time (which one did with me recently, not realizing I'd seen her tuck her cellphone away in her purse), asking where a certain street is. If it's obvious she wants attention but at least had the guts to actually SPEAK, then fine, I can go with that. But this idea of standing around waiting to be noticed and not saying a word until I do doesn't work with me at all. No big loss, we both leave with what we came with, nothing.
As I've posted before, I've had female acquaintances and co-workers flat out tell me that they sometimes flirt simply for attention and nothing more. Being that I'm not psychic I'm not interested in deciphering some random woman's vague 'clues' when she already knows full well whether or not she's interested and simply wants to see what hoops I'll jump through to gain her favor.
Good to see I'm not the only one who finds women 'orbiting' annoying. And yes,we as men can tell when they're doing it. It's almost arrogant; 'I'm going to make sure he sees me. All he has to do is see me, and he'll say something to me, I'm that hot'.
I don't mind a woman coming up with something to say, no matter how mundane, to get your attention--asking for the time (which one did with me recently, not realizing I'd seen her tuck her cellphone away in her purse), asking where a certain street is. If it's obvious she wants attention but at least had the guts to actually SPEAK, then fine, I can go with that. But this idea of standing around waiting to be noticed and not saying a word until I do doesn't work with me at all. No big loss, we both leave with what we came with, nothing.
As I've posted before, I've had female acquaintances and co-workers flat out tell me that they sometimes flirt simply for attention and nothing more. Being that I'm not psychic I'm not interested in deciphering some random woman's vague 'clues' when she already knows full well whether or not she's interested and simply wants to see what hoops I'll jump through to gain her favor.
None.
Shoot, I thought I was the only guy who found it creepy, awkward, and weird. No it isn't going to make me ask her out quite the opposite.
I dated women for years before I started dating guys and eventually married one. In all those years, never once did a woman approach me and started talking to me. I was always the one that made the first move.
I'm not the only one who has made this observation.
But since we love in a politically correct society now, fantasy trumps observation.
Lol.. darned if you do, darned if you don't! Some men complain that women never approach and some men complain when they do. If she approaches... there's something " wrong" with her.
If she subtle, ( so she's not looked at as being aggressive ) she thinks she's all that and she's
arrogant. What's a girl to do! LMAO
Lol.. darned if you do, darned if you don't! Men complain that women never approach and men complain when they do. If she approaches... there's something " wrong" with her.
If she subtle, ( so she's not looked at as being aggressive ) she thinks she's all that and she's
arrogant. What's a girl to do! LMAO
Speak up for what you want instead of playing 'coy'. Believe it or not there are actually confident women who do this. Either that, or stock up on kitty litter.
You also posted...
If she approaches... there's something " wrong" with her.
Walking past a guy and twirling your hair or standing in his line of sight just to be seen is not an 'approach'.
I really get the feeling that most of you, who say otherwise are just trying to find reasons to justify your own insecurities, bitterness, and refusal to do anything to help yourselves. Biology is a poor excuse. It doesn't matter if she's half way decent, unattractive, or sexy as hell, a man can choose whether or not to approach. They are the ones who give us the attention, you all try to shame us for. (Which is very manipulative, btw.) Men I've encountered who claim that their man parts make them do it were very entitled and lacked personal responsibility. Those men ALLOW their sex drives to control them.
I think you're right. Even during my younger "shy days", I was often asked by women to dance, to sit down with me, to have a drink, etc. And I am eternally grateful to those who did because it helped me realize that my lack of confidence was based on nonfactual things I believed about myself.
Still, much later in life, it was indeed my current wife who came up to the table I was sitting at, flattered me, and asked me to dance, 20 or so years ago.
Last week, a woman asked me if I was Nick. Since I'm not Nick, I said no. Does this count as an approach?
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