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I think you're right. Even during my younger "shy days", I was often asked by women to dance, to sit down with me, to have a drink, etc. And I am eternally grateful to those who did because it helped me realize that my lack of confidence was based on nonfactual things I believed about myself.
Still, much later in life, it was indeed my current wife who came up to the table I was sitting at, flattered me, and asked me to dance, 20 or so years ago.
Exhibit A: Woman With Confidence.
I raise my glass to your wife, sir, she is indeed a rare catch.
Speak up for what you want instead of playing 'coy'. Believe it or not there are actually confident women who do this. Either that, or stock up on kitty litter.
You also posted...
If she approaches... there's something " wrong" with her.
Walking past a guy and twirling your hair or standing in his line of sight just to be seen is not an 'approach'.
The poster you're responding to doesn't have any problem attracting men.
All we're doing is explaining how it is that we do approach men, and do put in effort.
If you don't recognize it that's fine.
I don't think any of us is trying to figure out how to get a man's attention just letting you know what works for us....
I think you're right. Even during my younger "shy days", I was often asked by women to dance, to sit down with me, to have a drink, etc. And I am eternally grateful to those who did because it helped me realize that my lack of confidence was based on nonfactual things I believed about myself.
Still, much later in life, it was indeed my current wife who came up to the table I was sitting at, flattered me, and asked me to dance, 20 or so years ago.
I applaud your wife sir. At least she opened her mouth and said something and didn't do some passive aggressive "orbiting" act.
Speak up for what you want instead of playing 'coy'. Believe it or not there are actually confident women who do this. Either that, or stock up on kitty litter.
You also posted...
If she approaches... there's something " wrong" with her.
Walking past a guy and twirling your hair or standing in his line of sight just to be seen is not an 'approach'.
Did I say it was? I said that if she "does" approach some guys will say that there's something wrong with her and others will complain when women don't do the approaching.
Look at your attitude... if she's coy... she's flawed. She arrogant.
I am guessing you don't like it if a woman flirts with you either or don't know when she is.
How many chihuahuas ( man cats) do you own?
No, I make women comfortable enough to come up and say something. I didn't always, but lately it's been happening more and more. I interact with those women, and those women only.
I've yet to meet a woman randomly in the street who intrigued me enough that I approached her, uninvited.
No, I make women comfortable enough to come up and say something. I didn't always, but lately it's been happening more and more. I interact with those women, and those women only.
I've yet to meet a woman randomly in the street who intrigued me enough that I approached her, uninvited.
Really? And just how do you make a women who doesn't know you from Adam feel comfortable enough to approach you? Smile, twirl your hair? , put your head down?
They apparently have no problem asking what book I'm reading, for example, sparking conversation. They definitely don't mind requesting that I reach something high up on a supermarket shelf for them. I take this to assume I'm 'approachable', on some level.
Women with insecurities, in my opinion, do the non-verbal 'orbiting' and 'flirting' stuff for fear of rejection. I'm not so hot that anyone is fearing or caring about rejection from me. I apparently just appear nice enough (which does mystify me a bit) that they don't mind speaking up. Again, I'm talking about women who exhibit confidence, not women who need the ego boost of having a guy they noticed approach them first.
Location: Huntersville/Charlotte, NC and Washington, DC
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Sydney123
Lol.. darned if you do, darned if you don't! Some men complain that women never approach and some men complain when they do. If she approaches... there's something " wrong" with her.
If she subtle, ( so she's not looked at as being aggressive ) she thinks she's all that and she's
arrogant. What's a girl to do! LMAO
Maybe just realize everyone ain't gonna feel you, so you may as well just obvious and let fall where it does. It's what guys have to do apparently.
They apparently have no problem asking what book I'm reading, for example, sparking conversation. They definitely don't mind requesting that I reach something high up on a supermarket shelf for them. I take this to assume I'm 'approachable', on some level.
Women with insecurities, in my opinion, do the non-verbal 'orbiting' and 'flirting' stuff for fear of rejection. I'm not so hot that anyone is fearing or caring about rejection from me. I apparently just appear nice enough (which does mystify me a bit) that they don't mind speaking up. Again, I'm talking about women who exhibit confidence, not women who need the ego boost of having a guy they noticed approach them first.
Again I ask... what is it that you do that makes a complete stranger feel comfortable enough to approach you?
I've asked guys to get things off of high shelves too, but what does that have to do with anything. I ask because I can't reach it... not as a ploy to meet him. Apples and oranges. Aren't you worried that these women are just being coy... "Oh I am short, it would be really nice if a big tall guy like you could get it down for me!"
Lol
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fall where it does. It's what guys have to do apparently.
