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Literally there are male and female soldiers that return from war with missing limbs. They are surrounded by initial infrastructure of support and aid from the VA. After time passes they are left to deal with their long-term wounds primarily by themselves. How they choose to psychologically deal with pain and disabilities is up to them but I would suggest a positive attitude and outlook goes a long way to keep family and friends around them.
He just started a new job and is up every morning at like 4/430, turning the tv on, the volume up, wants to have sex and breakfast made before he has to leave. It's annoying. He knows mornings are the hardest for me, I've told him enough times. I can't even eat that early. Never have been able to. I've never been a morning eater. It would always make me puke.
He intentionally acts stupid though. "Why are you so tired? Stop being so lazy."
And it's like MF I just spent 8 hours sleeping and feel like I just spent 8 hours awake...what do you mean why am I tired? I'm tired because I'm in pain and have metal in my back and I can't sleep unless drugged.
.
You need this like you need a hole in the head.
How long have you known this guy? Whose place are you two living in--yours or his? Was this kind of flack going on before you moved in together?
OP, one of the main points of having an SO is for mutual support. If you're not getting that, and not getting respect, you need to move on and find someone who can offer that. (Or no one, in the short term, until your health improves, maybe.) That could be challenging, though, because of the nature of your illness, which sounds fairly disabling and severe. I wouldn't rush to move in with anyone, either, for a variety of reasons. Take plenty of time to get to know someone first, before taking that major step. Because once they're in your space, it could be hard to get them out. And if you get into a rental situation where, say, you're both paying rent together that neither could afford on your own, then it's a big deal if you have to move when the bf leaves; there can be issues of breaking the lease, etc. Life gets complicated.
In sum, he's not going to change. You need to boot him out. So sorry you're having these health struggles. Major health issues suck. What's the prognosis, btw? Is there light at the end of the tunnel for you?
To be fair have you tried a little self reflection? There are a great many people out there that have gone through serious trauma and soldier on. The woe is me attitude can get a bit old and becomes contagious. Maybe he would be better served to move on.
Just sayin that life isn't all about your personal battles.
It's not a woe is me attitude.
I have damage to my spinal cord, numbness in my back that sometimes gets worse with activity, so it's not like I should be out there running around the park doing laps. I should stick to yoga, stretching and strenghthening.
Not lifting weights or running. I pinch something when I move funny and that happens easily.
I don't want to make my issues worse. Imagine if I did one of the activities and it paralyzed me?
My bottom half just dead and useless. Why would I be a dumbass and risk that? 😂😂😂 FMS
Quote:
Originally Posted by jrt1979
She's not doing anything to help her situation but complaining. My brother in-law still hits the gym and watches his diet, and he's missing an entire leg that got blown off in Iraq and has less than 70% breathing capacity from a throat injury. Sorry, but I can relate more with the BF. There's nothing more awful to watch than seeing someone give up, which is what this young woman has done.
If she needs attention, she should buy a selfi-stick and go to town on Facebook, but if she wants sound advice, I gave it to her.......Sounds like you could use some tough love too honestly
Well your BIL isn't risking paralyzingly himself hitting the gym. I could mess my back up even more. I've seen recent X-rays of my vertebrae and it's sharp and jagged. Please Dr.Quinn you don't know everything.
I haven't give up. I simply know my limitations.
Why would I go running if I know it'll indude a headache? Abdominal cramping?
Why? That'd be stupid on another level.
He simply wants and thinks I can do what I did before.
I can't. I've accepted that doing certain things may paralyze me and make my life worse.
Literally there are male and female soldiers that return from war with missing limbs. They are surrounded by initial infrastructure of support and aid from the VA. After time passes they are left to deal with their long-term wounds primarily by themselves. How they choose to psychologically deal with pain and disabilities is up to them but I would suggest a positive attitude and outlook goes a long way to keep family and friends around them.
Criticize me all you want but it is life.
I have a positive outlook.
However I don't like being woken up at 4 in the G-D morning after I've taken muscle relaxers that knock me out 6 hours earlier.
I don't like to be called lazy because I don't want to go running when I know it'll make my back cramp and my numbness worse. I rather pull out my yoga mat and do lunges or go swim laps at a pool.
It's not a woe is me attitude.
I have damage to my spinal cord, numbness in my back that sometimes gets worse with activity, so it's not like I should be out there running around the park doing laps. I should stick to yoga, stretching and strenghthening.
Not lifting weights or running. I pinch something when I move funny and that happens easily.
I don't want to make my issues worse. Imagine if I did one of the activities and it paralyzed me?
My bottom half just dead and useless. Why would I be a dumbass and risk that? 😂😂😂 FMS
Well your BIL isn't risking paralyzingly himself hitting the gym. I could mess my back up even more. I've seen recent X-rays of my vertebrae and it's sharp and jagged. Please Dr.Quinn you don't know everything.
I haven't give up. I simply know my limitations.
Why would I go running if I know it'll indude a headache? Abdominal cramping?
Why? That'd be stupid on another level.
He simply wants and thinks I can do what I did before.
I can't. I've accepted that doing certain things may paralyze me and make my life worse.
These same people telling you to toughen up wouldn't be able to last a month in your shoes.
It sounds like he's a bit insensitive to your needs, and you're sorta lazy. You kids probably aren't a very good match, so you might want to think about calling it quits.
I don't think I could be with someone that complained about health issues that didn't exercise or watch their diet, so I totally get him, but he should know you're not going to change by now, so why is he still there? SMH
Yeah.
Bitchezz with broken backs and cranial trauma be so lazy.
OP, what exactly happened with the car accident? Was it a drunk driver? Did someone run a red light?
What happened?
I ran a red light looking down too long trying to get the last cigarette out of the pack.
10 years with a license, no accidents and them bam I almost die in the first one I ever had.
How long have you known this guy? Whose place are you two living in--yours or his? Was this kind of flack going on before you moved in together?
OP, one of the main points of having an SO is for mutual support. If you're not getting that, and not getting respect, you need to move on and find someone who can offer that. (Or no one, in the short term, until your health improves, maybe.) That could be challenging, though, because of the nature of your illness, which sounds fairly disabling and severe. I wouldn't rush to move in with anyone, either, for a variety of reasons. Take plenty of time to get to know someone first, before taking that major step. Because once they're in your space, it could be hard to get them out. And if you get into a rental situation where, say, you're both paying rent together that neither could afford on your own, then it's a big deal if you have to move when the bf leaves; there can be issues of breaking the lease, etc. Life gets complicated.
In sum, he's not going to change. You need to boot him out. So sorry you're having these health struggles. Major health issues suck. What's the prognosis, btw? Is there light at the end of the tunnel for you?
Yes there is a light at the end of the tunnel and it starts by me doing things hat are good for me andndont harm me. Like taking care of myself in the ways that best work do me.
Swimming vs running for cardio.
Yoga, light exercises vs weight lifting equipment at the gym.
Sleeping on a schedule that works for me 7am vs 4am. Even if I worked I'd choose a job I had to be at by 9/930, getting up at 7 gives me plenty of time.
I ran a red light looking down too long trying to get the last cigarette out of the pack.
10 years with a license, no accidents and them bam I almost die in the first one I ever had.
You poor thing. I really do feel for you. What happened to you is terrible.
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