Am I putting too much pressure on myself

[coldcaller]

sometimes I feel like she & I are like a mother & father & her bro is our son, or like we're a couple and he's like our new puppy who requires attention and has accidents all over the house.

[coldcaller]

not to bash him or anything, but, just sometimes it feels like this

[coldcaller]

I've felt that he does these things as a way to get attention, even if its negative, because, I mean, it's gotta be weird for him to have the mindset not of, " Oh no, my parents are gonna ground me", but of, " Oh no, if my sister finds out, I'm in deep trouble", because, again, she will punish him.

[old_cold]

You are talking about two different issues.
If you and she are taking on parental roles with the brother, that's one thing and not a bad thing if you don't mind and can handle it.
Giving in to the girlfriend all the time is a whole different issue.

[coldcaller]

I think the taking on of the parent roles situation( which, at most, my " parent role" is just me telling him how how actions made his sister feel and that if he wants to not ever see his sister upset, he'd better stop doing XYZ and telling him that she is not trying to ruin his fun, she just wants him to be safe) is why I give in, because I think she has too much on her plate and my not giving her the " Yes dear, sounds good" response, adds more to her plate.

[coldcaller]

Spoke to her about our future or whatever and it was made clear that he will always be a focus of our relationship