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And in the OP's case, it probably wouldn't have been that much of an issue for this instructor to put a pin in his feelings (if reciprocated) and maybe get in touch with the student once she's left the program. Might still be a little squishily unethical, but not fully against the rules (unless it is?)
I think it is a little squishy, but I don't know how far you can push restrictions legally. For me, the power dynamic was there when they met and it will still be there to some extent after the person leaves the program. I guess I could live with that, though.
But this young man not only crossed the line of initiating contact with a person he was entrusted to advise, he did it in a crude and disgusting way. I think that says as much about his suitability to work with young people than merely wanting to date her, as off base as that is.
The thing is, even if it's not a large age difference, it is still the dynamic that is put into place with, say, a young teacher and a student: it is the power position that is the problem. Much can happen that could (not speaking for this case specifically, I don't really know anything about it) be coercion due to that power imbalance. There also a bazillion other reasons such "positions of power" "relationships" can be bad news.
It's the same as a college professor and a college student. The college student is an adult just as this 18-year-old is an adult. But these rules are in place for a reason.
And how about a doctor and patient? A doctor is committing misconduct (and could lose his license) for sexually approaching a patient no matter how old or young. She could be 20 years OLDER than he is and it would still be misconduct. Why? The position of power and trust being manipulated. (Potentially.) And lawyers...the list goes on and on, really.
I think the idea of a hostile act is an interesting one. So is the "showing my shameful stuff" idea - much like the flashers in days gone by. I think it could also be extreme lack of impulse control, which IS dangerous...no matter how you slice it. The implications for that last one just aren't good. Well, the implications for any of these scenarios aren't good.
Guys send those kind of pics all the time. I think its gross. I get on dating sites and I hate giving guys my number bc a lot of them send pics of their private parts.. FOR NO REASOB.
Right. I mean, what do guys think women are going to do?
I'm totally blown away that some idiots do this.
I sure don't get it. Women aren't as visually motivated as men are and as a man I seem to be more motivated by body shape than the "junk". I have always been more interested in the whole package than the little bits. Eyes would be an exception to that rule.
Obviously in a school setting this is way out of bounds, and I have never done it myself, but dont be naive, that women dont want these pictures. In fact, I was on tinder the other day, and a younfg attractive girl said "show me what youve got" as the only thing in her profile. Its kind of like men posting photos of themselves shirtless. Every woman claims that they would never appreciate one, but in reality they love them. But I get it, men are evil perverts and women are pure angels.
In fact, I was on tinder the other day, and a younfg attractive girl said "show me what youve got" as the only thing in her profile. Its kind of like men posting photos of themselves shirtless. Every woman claims that they would never appreciate one, but in reality they love them.
Imagine how clueless you'd have to be to believe that because one woman (or fake account) likes something, everyone does.
Obviously in a school setting this is way out of bounds, and I have never done it myself, but dont be naive, that women dont want these pictures. In fact, I was on tinder the other day, and a younfg attractive girl said "show me what youve got" as the only thing in her profile. Its kind of like men posting photos of themselves shirtless. Every woman claims that they would never appreciate one, but in reality they love them. But I get it, men are evil perverts and women are pure angels.
We're not being naive.
We don't want these pictures, with probably an extreme minority of exceptions.
Cool story, bro. If you keep digging you can for sure find more evidence to support any cause...there's every type out there for sure.
Aside from the obvious idiocy of the teacher thinking anyone wants to see his pee pee, who is that stupid to sext a student? In what universe would it be okay for a teacher to send a picture like that to a student? I too am baffled at just how stupid men can be. There seems to be one common denominator in all of these me-too perps. For some bizarre reason they think women are just dying to see their pee pee. Where does that come from?
I can only say with regard to a teacher that young, and the overall subject of impulse control, that I believe that before you are about 25 or so, give or take, your prefrontal cortex is simply not done growing. A 22 year old has impaired impulse control, potentially just as bad as a teenager. That part of the brain is responsible for rational thought, and especially foreseeing consequences and taking them seriously. Risk management. Smart choices, even if not immediately gratifying.
Also, unrelated, the only men who have ever sent me unsolicited d-pics have been the singers of not-extremely-famous metal bands. One, his band had broken up and he was pursuing a career in fitness training and bodybuilding. He posted a picture on social media intended to show off his thigh muscles, that he had been working on. But he was wearing pink boxer briefs, and every comment was either about his package or the color of his shorts. I made a Red Dwarf reference joke about a second pair of socks, and he messaged me to indignantly insist that there were no socks in his underpants, no indeed, nothing but himself. I said, "I believe you! Just giving you hell dude." And he said he would show me. "No, you really don't need to do that." "I need to do that." "You do not. Please. No." "I'm gonna." *sigh*... Annnd he did. I was like, "well. That's your penis. I'm...uh...happy for you?" What I was supposed to say at that point, I'm not even sure.
The other time, a guy was bored at a dinner with some business acquaintances and we had been texting. It's earlier where I am, and I was still at work. A few minutes go by with no response back and forth. Buzz. A text. My connection wasn't great, so I held up my phone to get the text, which was a picture, to load. And there is a random wang. Wonderful. I had to quickly hide my phone, which I'd been holding UP IN THE AIR in the middle of the cubicle farm. He had gone to the restroom and snapped the pic, because apparently he was just that bored.
I don't know if my suspicion is correct, but I assumed that the singers of metal bands just have some innate need for attention.
The late singer of GWAR, Dave Brockie, actually photoshopped his own face onto a photo of his willy and had a t-shirt made out of it. So we've ALL seen his junk.
EDIT: Also there is a thread on a certain adult social website asking women to critique men's d-pics. I always found that kind of funny.
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