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At least he offered early Sunday. But if your heart's not in it - don't do it. But personally, as a guy, I would never drop plans with long-time friends for a women I'm not serious with yet.
At least he offered early Sunday. But if your heart's not in it - don't do it. But personally, as a guy, I would never drop plans with long-time friends for a women I'm not serious with yet.
Well, he originally said next weekend and only suggested Sunday after I questioned him, so no thanks. And if you have to hang out with your friend five days out of the week, no thanks.
I don't know of any straight guy that hangs out with a gay guy on a regular basis. In a group setting, sure, but not 1 on 1.
I know, right? I gave him the benefit of the doubt because he only moved here a few years ago, he doesn’t have any family here, and he said it’s been hard making friends. So he gets along really well with this gay guy and that’s cool and all, but it wasn’t enough to hang out with him four days in a row and go away with him for the holiday, but now all of a sudden you have to spend Saturday with him too? Nope.
Focus on what is between you and him rather than questioning the nature of the friendship (or whatever) with the gay dude. You know that he is not cooperating in ways that work for you, with getting together and building a relationship start with you. He does not seem enthused enough to put much effort into spending time with you. And if you question him on things that seem odd or make you uncomfortable, he's coming back with "you're being weird about this" or whatever. Is he trying to set the stage for an interaction where he does whatever he wants at any time with zero consideration of you, and you shut up and put up with it for fear of being accused of overreaction or unreasonableness?
I mean at the extreme end, some guys do this whole crazymaking behavior where they do something that they know very well will upset you, and then act all put out at you for being upset. Some guys even seem to feel safe and smug when they nuke a dating interaction if they can later say "well she was crazy." Sure she was.
I mean, a weird incident of some weirdness on the phone, eh, could have been anything. Whatever.
But when someone is building a pattern of disrespecting your time and letting you down... I mean, at this point I'd be telling him, either, a.) wait until your summer plans with your friend are all played out and you have time to date, before you actually try to date...or b.) maybe you should be dating your friend, since you seem to be...dating him.
But I wouldn't blame you for being done at this point.
Ok, we spoke about the drugs and he says he hasn’t taken any drugs since college but he does talk in his sleep sometimes. Anyway, we’re currently not on great terms, so tell me if I overreacted. We started talking last Thursday. He worked last weekend so I figured we would meet up this weekend. He hung out with his gay friend on Sunday, Monday (spent the night over his house), and they were out of town together on Tuesday and Wednesday to celebrate the holiday together. He’s been communicating with me every day, so he would mention that he was hanging out with his friend and that’s how I knew.
So he texted me today and I asked him what day does he want to get together. He said that this weekend wasn’t really good for him so maybe next weekend. And I was like “Oh really, what’s going on this weekend? You’re not going to have any free time on Friday, Saturday, or Sunday?” And he said that he has to go to an event with his coworkers on Friday evening, Saturday he’s going to a ticketed event with his gay friend, and he’ll be busy preparing for work Sunday evening but maybe we could get together early Sunday. Now, I totally understand that people have friends and social lives and all that, but you can’t make any time for me because you’re hanging out with your gay friend practically every day? I hate that I sound like a jealous girlfriend already, but that’s how I feel about the situation. So I told him that I think people make time for the things they want to make time for and he was like “You’re being weird about this” and I didn’t text anything back after that. I mean, I really don’t think that there’s anything sexual going on with his gay friend, but as much time as they spend together, they might as well be dating. I’m not ok with being put on the backburner for that.
Ok, am I wrong? lol Maybe there was a better way that I could’ve handled the situation without getting snippy and showing him that I was annoyed, but I couldn’t help it so I just said what was on my mind.
And at the risk of being slammed from all corners, it IS a little weird that he simply must carve out days in a row to do random things with his "gay" friend, refusing to see a potential girlfriend as a result. I mean if they had something significant set up, if somebody was getting married or something, obviously one wouldn't cancel that. Whether for a gay friend, a straight friend, a Furry, a ponyplay enthusiast, an...anybody. But the way it was presented here, he just HAD to carve out day after day after day to hang out with this dude, to do random stuff. I'm sorry. That does raise a question mark, at least to me.
Whatever the actual reason(s), 1. yes. He's weird, not good-weird but just weird. 2. yes. He acts oddly toward SLS and rebuffs her. 3. there's nothing here. Was there ever? Even wanting to deal with this guy is a little odd, SLS. You say he was interesting and so on but I'm not seeing it. Where? When? Time to move on, he can do him and you can do you.
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He’s been communicating with me every day, so he would mention that he was hanging out with his friend and that’s how I knew. 
