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I don't care about her job/career since how she earns a living does not define who she truly is.
Actually, sometimes it does. I'm a writer. I'm a reader. I'm a researcher and learner. This is how I make my living. I can never remember *not* being and doing these things.
Certainly one's career choice can be a huge part of the person and his/her actual persnality, nature, etc. Many, many people choose a career based on that career being important in a personal way, or being a deep interest, a life's goal, or something else that is very personal. For example, music has always been extremely important to my husband. He has worked in the music industry his entire adult life. It is definitely a huge part of him in a quite literal way.
People may become doctors, be in the military, become architects, teachers, artists, a thousand different things and their careers can be that personal, and yes, will partly define them, so to speak.
Yes, JerZ. There is a big difference between people who pursue what life offers and those who helplessly let life be inflicted upon them.
Agreed. I've been at a crossroads more than once in my career, "what do I really want to accomplish? What makes it all seem worthwhile?" And twice now, right back to school after I found out what it would take. No I'm not independently wealthy, I don't go for the money-making field, I've taken out loans, I work my way up, but this is my life. Am I going to look back and wish I hadn't cared about my own happiness? Men come and go. I haven't hung on to one yet that doesn't make me happy.
When I was 40 and single, I always looked for a woman that was the best at whatever it was she did for a living. That means she is committed to whatever it is she is involved with. Before anything got serious, she also had to be relatively debt free. Nothing quite so nice as to have a bar-b-q at a ladies house and then have a bill collector show up. The first clue about her handling money is rented appliances and furniture. That's okay when you're 20 but not 40. I was relatively lucky. Found a woman who was a teacher. She taught elementary kids the computer. She's now is the purchasing agent for the 5th largest school district riding herd over 50,000 units and growing. Life ain't perfect, it never will be, but it's close enough to be happy.
I would only be concerned with if/how she enhances my life. All else is secondary.
I don't care about her job/career since how she earns a living does not define who she truly is. And true education (not to be confused with book leaning) is mostly experiential and can't really be taught in school.
It may or it may not.
There are numerous ways and instances where career choice and character and personality are inextricably tied.
Not a deal breaker for me!
A woman who takes care of herself.
Easy to get along with.
Has a work ethic.
Pays her own bills.
Obviously not intimidated by judgement.
Resolved to doing what must be done to help herself, without loss of dignity.
40ish and shrewd enough to appreciate a job that most people wouldn't do.
And the rarest of qualities is that she's probably humble.
Too bad women like this don't actually exist!
Side Note: Burger flippers in McDonalds make over 30k a year in some states $15 bucks an hour now.
I can see past the yellow arches and sense the grind. I would appreciate her lot in life (no one has a change for me button)but I would wonder
what a mind like that would do in a different forum.
I think it's noteworthy that the OP specifies "a woman your age."
While people are vilifying women who have reached middle age with no solid professional background and education to match, in terms of pairing off with a partner who has both, this same critique doesn't seem to be consistently applied when men of this age and credentials pair off with much younger women. It's not especially uncommon for financially stable, gainfully employed men well into middle age to acquire "trophy wife"/hot young girlfriend types without any education or professional background or aspirations (other than snagging a financially set guy), and nobody sees a problem with that, comparatively speaking. Nobody ever asks, "What could they possibly have in common??" It doesn't seem to matter so much, somehow.
I guess the takeaway is that if you're young enough, and pretty enough as a female, it's not so bad to have no career or education. But pass a sell-by date, and you'd best have lined up both.
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Exactly. That’s considered the norm in our society. The only thing they have in common is he wants a hot body to bang and she is able to enjoy a lifestyle that would be beyond her means.
When it comes to finding a woman your age, how important is it that she has a good job/career? By that I mean, say you were single and met a woman that was pretty, in good shape, fun to be around, nice etc. however say she had never gotten a college education and was working at some very menial job, say burger flipper at McDonald's or the like. Would you be okay with it, or would it be a deal breaker?
A woman flipping burgers at 40 as a permanent job does this because she has no other choices. Which means she hasn't given much thought to independence during the peak years of her life. Which means she was either dependent on someone all this time or had zero ambition or interest in improving her life. Which means I am to be the person to elevate her financially. So I would probably pass. But if she had a meaningful job that she loved, I'd be OK with her not making a whole lot of money - as long as she is passionate about it.
A woman flipping burgers at 40 as a permanent job does this because she has no other choices. Which means she hasn't given much thought to independence during the peak years of her life. Which means she was either dependent on someone all this time or had zero ambition or interest in improving her life. Which means I am to be the person to elevate her financially. So I would probably pass. But if she had a meaningful job that she loved, I'd be OK with her not making a whole lot of money - as long as she is passionate about it.
Bingo.
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