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You guys are all terrific! I really read all the posts and think them through.
For everyone talking about the "marriage" thing...I was actually just playing with that thought...it'll be one month on the 29th...way too early, IMO, to think marriage.
I am treating the relationship as well as him with respect appropriately. We spent the whole holiday weekend together and had a great time watching movies in bed, going to the beach......
I know he's young, I understand the age difference, and at the same time, I just want to take things slowly...I told him he makes me very happy over the weekend and his eyes just lit up....he came to see me at work last Friday afternoon...and you know how you look at someone, and they look at you & you just see the sun, moon & stars looking back at you...that's what turns me on.
Again, he did tell me this is more than just a sexual thing for him...that does scare me a bit...however, I have no qualms discussing anything with him, at this point in my life, with one xhusband of 12 years, two children, an xboyfriend of 8 years, plus a load of other experiences, nothing can really shock me.
I worry about falling for him, but, then again, that can happen with anyone in any age group and not work out...I'm not worried about the menapause changing my looks things...I'm French and Algonquin besides being Jewish...very fiesty combination.....you all probably need a picture on this one right?
Whatever will be will be....now, my xboyfriend, is now getting kicked to the curb by the ugly girl as he wanted a one/one sexual commitment and she won't give it to him...(as I'm rotflmao...karma is a b*tch.....time he got a taste of his own meds)...and now he's trying to go out, still with my girlfriends, who are not comfy with that...why are men so stupid in that way?
"I worry about falling for him, but, then again, that can happen with anyone in any age group and not work out...I'm not worried about the menapause changing my looks things...I'm French and Algonquin besides being Jewish...very fiesty combination.....you all probably need a picture on this one right? "
Lady, you worry about falling for him. Haven't you already fallen for him. If the sun, moon and stars come out when you look at him, I'd say that it's way past the falling stage lol. Believe me it doesn't matter what you look like when you're going through the menopause- it's the way you feel that changes things. Like you I've always looked young for my age and am still getting chatted up by younger men even though I'm now 61. But the changes the menopause makes to how you feel can be at best, amusing, and at worst downright devastating. I didn't think it would affect me but it did. I always had a very healthy sexual appetite, so it was a massive shock to me(and to my then partner of 11years standing) when I suddenly lost total interest in sex. In fact I told him I would rather he found someone who could provide what he needed, and he was devastated that I wanted to let him go, even though I knew he loved me totally. I ended the relationship and am now alone, and I might say, happy to be so. He has not been in another relationship since, and says he can't imagine loving anyone as much as he loves me, and we are now good friends. He's happy too, on his own. Incidentally, he is younger than me too. I guess what I'm saying is, just be prepared for these changes, and make sure he knows what could happen too. We all know that most men just don't understand these things even when you explain them in words of one syllable lol. I can look back now and laugh when I think of the way I turned from being the most rational, funny person ever, to a fishwife(some of the time), because of my hormones. I became totally unreasonable and took everything the wrong way(what I once joked about became personal insults). It is at the same time both awful and funny, but believe me I never in my wildest dreams thought I would be affected that way(and this was with hrt)- hrt in fact did not agree with me at all. I was much better off it. But then everyone is different. I sincerely hope you sail through the change. I thought I would too, but I was so, so wrong. Just hope things work out for you whatever you decide to do. God bless. Mary
I was in a may-december when I was about his age. She was a very good looking woman. Looked much younger than she was. Heck, I'da married her in a heartbeat except she explained she was in lust for me, not loved me. She had a son only a few years younger.
Now on the other hand I've been the december lately and now realize younger people fall "in love" very easily. I was dating a 26 yr old, and she started the affair explaining she just wanted to date, wasn't looking for an exclusive, just wanted to have fun with guys.
Week two her: "I think I'm falling for you"
" " me: "That's great I like you too!"
Week three her: "Youre not seeing anybody else, I'm not either do you want it that way?(realizing the reason we're only seeing each other is since week two we see each other daily)
I worry about falling for him, but, then again, that can happen with anyone in any age group and not work out...I'm not worried about the menapause changing my looks things...I'm French and Algonquin besides being Jewish...very fiesty combination.....you all probably need a picture on this one right?
I'd say don't fight "falling for him" and just enjoy the experience! It's only been 5 weeks. Right now, you both are in the honeymoon/infatuation period of your relationship. Just enjoy the feelings.... and don't go eloping with him! I don't think any relationship needs to be on a strict timeline of development. What you have with him doesn't have to turn into a marriage. And it's way too soon to decide that. On the other hand, don't set any limits to your relationship either. The only important thing is to treat him as an adult and your relationship peer. Always respect and be kind to each other. Make each other laugh and be happy. Then see what you both are feeling after a few years.
My boyfriend and I felt that the 3 year and 5 year marks were good points at which to evaluate our relationship. Because that would cover the honeymoon/infatuation period of all relationships, and if we still felt lovingly toward each other after that, then we figured what we have is the real thing.
I was in a may-december when I was about his age. She was a very good looking woman. Looked much younger than she was. Heck, I'da married her in a heartbeat except she explained she was in lust for me, not loved me. She had a son only a few years younger.
Now on the other hand I've been the december lately and now realize younger people fall "in love" very easily. I was dating a 26 yr old, and she started the affair explaining she just wanted to date, wasn't looking for an exclusive, just wanted to have fun with guys.
Week two her: "I think I'm falling for you"
" " me: "That's great I like you too!"
Week three her: "Youre not seeing anybody else, I'm not either do you want it that way?(realizing the reason we're only seeing each other is since week two we see each other daily)
Week 4 her: I HAVE FALLEN IN LOVE YOU!
Week five: "Marry Me!"
My younger boyfriend told me right away that he loved me. But he is cautious about the marriage stuff. Now that I have men flirting with me at my new job, he is more seriously considering marrying me. lol But he doesn't have anything to worry about. But I told him in retrospect that I should have lied and told my co-workers that I was married instead of only having a boyfriend! I think that many of my co-workers don't understand a longterm relationship without and engagement or marriage, but are used to knowing women that are more traditional and wanting to be married as soon as they can.
You are 46 and somewhat attractive if a 23 year old is on you. It's ego puffing especially if you are ego bruised in any way.
Remember no matter how mature he seems YOU as a older woman are FAR more mature.
Slow down, enjoy. Spice things up! Go for a park by the train tracks when you know ones coming(wink) Show him older women think of more romantic stuff, than young girls. The let him drive while you do stuff.
Location: Visitation between Wal-Mart & Home Depot
8,309 posts, read 38,787,526 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by optiflex
You are 46 and somewhat attractive if a 23 year old is on you. It's ego puffing especially if you are ego bruised in any way.
Remember no matter how mature he seems YOU as a older woman are FAR more mature.
Slow down, enjoy. Spice things up! Go for a park by the train tracks when you know ones coming(wink) Show him older women think of more romantic stuff, than young girls. The let him drive while you do stuff.
Agreed. Keep in mind that almost anything you want to try will be a first for him and he will remember your intimacies for the rest of his life. You have a chance to really shape a young man, enjoy it.
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