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Well, he is going from one extreme to the other extreme is all I'm worried about. Find some middle ground and work with that is what I suggest....I think we are both saying that and seem to agree on that part. Right?
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Originally Posted by VoyagerMan
He doesn't have to straight say it. Although he did say he went to her house even though he didn't want to.
And glad you decide when the story is over. You told him to stay with her, now your saying he should ditch her?
Not that I'm ignoring you Art.. I'm going to keep both options in mind they each sound pretty good and I'll see how everything turns out. But both of you thanks for your help~
Hey everyone, I decided to post on this forum just to receive some feedback on my situation at the moment. I've been with my girlfriend for about a year now, I'm 17 and so is she we are both sexually active etc. This summer we spent ALOT of time together just relaxing and staying inside of her house sometimes sleeping over as well. I realized I literally felt obliged to spend time with her because I thought she'd get sad if I wanted to stay home but this wasn't the case because my girlfriend is very understanding and is not needy. I realize now that I'm the one who is needy.. I've clinged to her so much during the summer for like 3months straight that even though didn't feel like going to her house I went anyway because I needed her so much... so i could not get the alone time that was needed to keep a relationship healhty..
So now I'm in a dilemma theres a part of me that got so sick of her because i clinged to her and spent so much time with her that I feel i need to break up... but we were perfectly fine besides all of this, but the other side of me wants to stick together because she is an amazing person and shes so compatible with me, and i love her. But now everytime i try and make it work the feeling of wanting to break up with her comes back again because I still haven't succesfully broken away like i feel like i need to do... but I don't want too because i don't want to lose her over this.. Everything was just fine with out relationship besides this, can we make it work somehow? I cannot stand the feeling of needing to break up wit her because it effects me in so many ways... and tears me apart.
So IM wondering is breaking up the right thing to do to relieve us both from the pain. Also now when i go to spend a day with her by the end of the day im completely sick of being at her house and I want to get out of there, and this feeling brings up the feeling of wanting to break away.. meaning break up with her... so eveyrtime i try and spend time with her on a schedule liek i see her one day, than take 2 days off by the end of the day im sick of her and i the feeling of needing to break away comes back. Would becoming independent fix this problem?, I'm not sure how to get rid of the feeling of needing to break away without actually doing it... because i dno't want to lose her over this.. and i'm still as dependent as i've always been
Doesn't sound like you have a job, which at 17 if you were my son, you'd be working weekends and as many hours as you could during the summer. Having a job I think would help. You'd be busy certain days and wouldn't have time to sit around and worry about being dependent on her.
When I was your age, I not only had a BF but friends, we all hung out together on our days off. You need to have other people around, doesn't sound like either of you do. Do you have any friends besides her?
You guys got into a habit during the summer, spent a lot of time together, that's also normal; at some point you're going to get sick of each other or feel like you don't have a life except for spending time with her. Now you need to find something to do besides what you've been doing.
So, your choices are, get a job, start including friends, continue the way you are or break up. You just need to figure out which one(s) to pick.
Yeah, we did get into a pretty bad habit of seeing eachother ALL day. I pretty much spent so much time that I got sick of her by the end of the day and I literally gave up everything I stopped hanging out with freinds which I know isn't good but yeah I pretty much already feel sick of her and don't feel like I have a life outside of her. I'm going to start hanging out with my friends again and do things to keep my mind off her.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Roselvr
Doesn't sound like you have a job, which at 17 if you were my son, you'd be working weekends and as many hours as you could during the summer. Having a job I think would help. You'd be busy certain days and wouldn't have time to sit around and worry about being dependent on her.
When I was your age, I not only had a BF but friends, we all hung out together on our days off. You need to have other people around, doesn't sound like either of you do. Do you have any friends besides her?
You guys got into a habit during the summer, spent a lot of time together, that's also normal; at some point you're going to get sick of each other or feel like you don't have a life except for spending time with her. Now you need to find something to do besides what you've been doing.
So, your choices are, get a job, start including friends, continue the way you are or break up. You just need to figure out which one(s) to pick.
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