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Hello,
Thanks in advance for listening and any advice you can give. I have dated and lived with a wonderful man the last 9 months, have had a couple breakups but we always have gotten back together. He is the first person ever in my life that I have had this much fun with and had such strong feelings for. The drawback is our relationship is great if eveything goes his way (food. living arrangements, movies,etc) He has always been accusing me of still having sex with a previous bf (who's a neighbor), so I am constantly reassuring him that this is not true. I lost my job in February and found another one in another state in March and we tried to do the long distance thing but between my taking this new job and the previous bf he hung up the phone on me a week ago after saying he doesn't want to ever speak to me again. I have tried numerous times to contact him via phone, letters, sending pizza (!), and texting but total silence. What went wrong? Are we broke up? Should I keep hoping? Should I go back and try to discuss this in person (he hates discussing anything serious)? I hurt so bad I want to die! I can't sleep, eat, or concentrate-maybe if I had closure it would help. Any advice or summation what is going on is appreciated!!!!!
Sorry Sweetie. It's over.
You have to move on. You are only making yourself a laughing stock to him and his buddies by doing things to keep it going. Like sending pizza and things is only going to make you look worse.
I'm sorry. I hope you can just remain silent for a while and let these feelings pass. They will but you have to stop calling and reaching out. You did what you could and it's over. The ball is in his court now. If he doesn't serve it back then forget him.
You can write me and I will make you laugh and forget about that loser!
Hello,
Thanks in advance for listening and any advice you can give. I have dated and lived with a wonderful man the last 9 months, have had a couple breakups but we always have gotten back together. He is the first person ever in my life that I have had this much fun with and had such strong feelings for. The drawback is our relationship is great if eveything goes his way (food. living arrangements, movies,etc) He has always been accusing me of still having sex with a previous bf (who's a neighbor), so I am constantly reassuring him that this is not true. I lost my job in February and found another one in another state in March and we tried to do the long distance thing but between my taking this new job and the previous bf he hung up the phone on me a week ago after saying he doesn't want to ever speak to me again. I have tried numerous times to contact him via phone, letters, sending pizza (!), and texting but total silence. What went wrong? Are we broke up? Should I keep hoping? Should I go back and try to discuss this in person (he hates discussing anything serious)? I hurt so bad I want to die! I can't sleep, eat, or concentrate-maybe if I had closure it would help. Any advice or summation what is going on is appreciated!!!!!
He's insecure. Why are you even wasting your time on him? Please move on. I know its easier said than done, but its a MUST that you do because you'll only drive yourself crazy wasting your time on this guy because he's not going to change. You already said you have broken up and gotten back together a couple of times and you've only been living with him for 9 months..RED FLAG.
I think that the icing on the cake for Mike not talking any more is because of what I said to a previous b/f about what Mike does and is which he repeated back to Mike after I left for OK City (thanks to good ole bee!). It is VERY personal info and I shouldn't have told this to Chuck but I did (beer) and now I only have me to blame for what I did. How does one ask for forgiveness after this? I have done the best I can but he refuses to communicate. So this is the whole story of what happened. Mike is not as selfish as I put it to be but just a very sensitive and private person and I violated his privacy. Thanks for listening and any advice and correctiveness is appreciated.
Even without the unfortunate disclosure of personal information you were on 2 different paths. Long distance relationships are VERY hard with a good solid foundation, in your case with the previous problems, it would be like spitting in the wind-follow the advice of the previous posters and move on. The list of why to do so is as long as this topic. It is much better to find someone who can add joy to your life not anxiety
This relationship was doomed before you even met this guy.
He has severe issues. He is extremely insecure where relationships are concerned and, i'm sorry to say, you will NOT change that.
No matter how nice you think he is or how perfect you think he is for you...... You need someone who trusts you. Trust is the foundation of any relationship.
NO trust ...... NO relationship.
It might seem hard at the moment but it would NEVER work.
My advice is...... Thank your lucky stars it ended just after 9 months.
Sounds like a bad wreck of a relationship walk away. I had a discussion with a niece when she broke up with her then bf. His sisters were giving her a bad time. Anyway I told her (engineering student at collage) it is never worthwhile to sacrifice ones dreams to make someone else happy.
If they make them chose between them and your dreams following your dreams. In the long run you will be rewarded for following your dreams.
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