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I don't think anyone is talking about those who are 5-10 minutes late.
We're talking about people who are 30+ minutes late.
Without a phone call that's just rude and inconsiderate.
My husband is a diabetic and needs to know the eating schedule...notice I didn't say he needs to SET the eating schedule. But if someone says dinner at 6....he takes his shot then he has to wait until the rude people get there it's dangerous.
So yes. sometimes people need to be taken to task for being rude. Or "up in arms" as you call it.
Why would he wait to eat? That makes no sense. As a diabetic, he know he has to eat, there is no one I will risk my health for. My sister knew I was always late and she would have a snack or something rather than wait for me.
But 98% of the time I will call if I'm running late.
If I have reservations for dinner (or any other concrete plans with someone) and they show up late without even a phone call, I seriously have to reconsider what I'm doing spending my free time with such a person. Of course there are exceptions, but I'm speaking about those who CONSTANTLY run late. Sorry, but if I can get to where I need to be on time, what's your excuse?
To me, it's the hallmark of a self-centered person. Not the type I'd like to deal with in my spare time.
That's true. Most of my friends have just accepted the fact that I'm a scatterbrain but even with that I'm never more than 10 minutes late and I always call. We have another friend who is not only late and doesn't call but won't answer her cell when you call her. I have a friend who works at Disney so we used to all get in for free; we'd planned to meet at Epcot at 9 am. At 9:15 I called her and she was 10 minutes away. At 9:40 she still hadn't shown up and when I called again, it went to voice mail after a few rings. I called right back and it went straight to voice mail - 3 times. At 10, we went in the park. At 10:30 she calls me to see where we are and I said Splash Mountain...she wanted me to send my friend back out to get her. I told her sure, give us 10 minutes and then turned my cell off. Couldn't believe she expected us to wait for her to show up (90 minutes later) and then stop what we were doing, leave the park,and get on the monorail to go meet her.
If I have reservations for dinner (or any other concrete plans with someone) and they show up late without even a phone call, I seriously have to reconsider what I'm doing spending my free time with such a person. Of course there are exceptions, but I'm speaking about those who CONSTANTLY run late. Sorry, but if I can get to where I need to be on time, what's your excuse?
To me, it's the hallmark of a self-centered person. Not the type I'd like to deal with in my spare time.
Yes, I am to, people who are chronically late, annoys me to no end, I think it's rude and unthinking, and yes, a controlling trait...
I can understand once in a while, but not all the time...my entire family was like that, and my mother allowed them to get away with it, until I moved back home and I voiced my opinion and left them know how rude they were. So, now, they are never late when they come to my home for dinner.
I dated someone once, who was late all the time...oh, he'd call to say he was coming, but was at times, as much as 2 hours late...he did it on purpose...he loved playing mind games...our relationship did not last long.
Yeah, I wasn't under the impression that there's anything wrong with ordering a drink while you wait. I thought that was expected. Are there some here who don't think you should ever do that? Sometimes we'll go early just to relax and have a drink or two beforehand. It's nice, relaxing.
I don't think that's rude at all. I try to be on time and usually am, but if something came up and I was running late, I'd be relieved to see my friends having a drink and an appetizer when I got there. I'd apologize and tell them the appetizer was on me.
That's true. Most of my friends have just accepted the fact that I'm a scatterbrain but even with that I'm never more than 10 minutes late and I always call. We have another friend who is not only late and doesn't call but won't answer her cell when you call her. I have a friend who works at Disney so we used to all get in for free; we'd planned to meet at Epcot at 9 am. At 9:15 I called her and she was 10 minutes away. At 9:40 she still hadn't shown up and when I called again, it went to voice mail after a few rings. I called right back and it went straight to voice mail - 3 times. At 10, we went in the park. At 10:30 she calls me to see where we are and I said Splash Mountain...she wanted me to send my friend back out to get her. I told her sure, give us 10 minutes and then turned my cell off. Couldn't believe she expected us to wait for her to show up (90 minutes later) and then stop what we were doing, leave the park,and get on the monorail to go meet her.
I'm sorry, I forgot to multi-quote. I know someone who is like this and he drives me nuts. He'll say he is 10 minutes away, yet an hour later he still hasn't shown up, and sometimes he doesn't show up at all. He's a friend of a friend--I'd drop him like a hot rock if I had a choice.
Which is ruder? Showing up to meet at a restaurant late (knowing you have a reservation) or showing up on time, not waiting for the late people, and ordering drinks and appetizers?
Thanks.
Showing up late when you know there are reservations is by far the rudest thing ever...showing up late for breakfast, lunch or dinner is rude and shows a total lack of respect for who is sitting there waiting for you to show up. This is my pet peeve as I have relatives who are NEVER not EVER on time for anything. If whoever is waiting for you to show up orders drinks and appetizers then suck it up....consequences of being rude for being late.
This past Sunday, I made arrangements to meet someone for breakfast at 9:30 am...I got there, place was beyond crowded so I phoned to see where they were. "Oh, we got a late start this morning so we won't be there for a while yet". Can you say cell phone? Can you say why didn't you call me earlier at home? I told this couple that I wasn't about to go into this restaurant and sit at a table alone and wait for them. So....there I was out in the parking lot playing with my cell phone waiting for them to show up. They arrived a half hour later at 10:00 am, then we had to wait for a table and didn't get seated until 10:15 am, they gobbled down their breakfast and announced they had to leave to go shopping.,.no visiting with me, no second coffee and these two were my SON and his WIFE!!
Showing up late when you know there are reservations is by far the rudest thing ever...showing up late for breakfast, lunch or dinner is rude and shows a total lack of respect for who is sitting there waiting for you to show up. This is my pet peeve as I have relatives who are NEVER not EVER on time for anything. If whoever is waiting for you to show up orders drinks and appetizers then suck it up....consequences of being rude for being late.
This past Sunday, I made arrangements to meet someone for breakfast at 9:30 am...I got there, place was beyond crowded so I phoned to see where they were. "Oh, we got a late start this morning so we won't be there for a while yet". Can you say cell phone? Can you say why didn't you call me earlier at home? I told this couple that I wasn't about to go into this restaurant and sit at a table alone and wait for them. So....there I was out in the parking lot playing with my cell phone waiting for them to show up. They arrived a half hour later at 10:00 am, then we had to wait for a table and didn't get seated until 10:15 am, they gobbled down their breakfast and announced they had to leave to go shopping.,.no visiting with me, no second coffee and these two were my SON and his WIFE!!
I don't think that's rude at all. I try to be on time and usually am, but if something came up and I was running late, I'd be relieved to see my friends having a drink and an appetizer when I got there. I'd apologize and tell them the appetizer was on me.
yes, totally acceptable, you would want them to do so...
Yes, I agree what my son and his wife did this past weekend is beyond rude and not anything new. It has been a frustrating part of my life ever since they got married. My son was not raised to be this rude and has only become so since he has been with her. Don't get me wrong, I love my daughter-in-law but she has massive issues with control this being one of them. My son?? Well, he is whipped big time and it just irks me because I can't and won't say anything. I have made subtle remarks, but it just doesn't sink in. I know it is her. While we are breakfast and the conversation starts, she won't look at me. She talks and looks directly at my son..never has been able to look me in the face when talking. This body language alone says to me, "I am tolerating you". She also does NOT clean herself up well before coming to breakfast. Clothes are wrinkled and stained, no makeup, nasty shoes. It is almost like she intentionally dresses like a slob to irk me. Last time she did this, before I could not stop myself, I said, "Oh, what are you planning for after breakfast, a little dumpster diving". My son bent over his car and laughed and she merely looked bewildered. I WAS SERIOUS.
I don't know what the answer is to their rudeness. It extends to every social function they attend with us and other family members. My son seems to be frustrated but won't say anything..whipped. Hell, when I was at Yale last year for open heart surgery, they were there the day of surgery but didn't come back until the day before I was due to be sent home. My husband had to call him to see where he was and my son's excuse was that he "had a cold"...yeah, right. My husband told him to go buy a mask at CVS and next thing I Knew my son and his dingbat wife were visiting me at the hospital.
I do believe that with my daughter in law as well as with other people who are late all the time it is all about control and not wanting other people to dictate their schedule. It is all about a lack of respect, and it is all about not being a mature adult who is well aware of proper social etiquette.
My son needs to grow some bigger circular lower protrubances..if you get my drift and his wife needs to see a shrink because this breakfast game is growing old........
Being late is incredibly rude unless in case of an emergency. Ordering drinks and appetizers while waiting for latecomers is perfectly acceptable. As a restaurant owner I get really miffed if someone makes a reservation on a busy night and then strolls in over half an hour late, particularly when I have people sitting at the bar to eat because the tables were reserved.
I've noticed that attention to basic etiquette has really slipped in recent years but maybe it's because too many children in this "eat and run" and "fast food" generation aren't being raised with manners? Cheers!
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