Are kids really a dealbreaker for that many people? (college, psycho, beautiful)
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Hmmm, this got me wondering how old the average person responding to this thread is.
My guess is almost all of you who are saying "NO" (me included) would change their tune if they found themselves 40+ and single. Options are what they are at that age.
What would your opinion be if the kids were grown and out of the house??
I don't want to have kids AT ALL. I also don't want to deal with someone else's kids. The funny thing is anytime I say this to friends and family they don't believe me. Maybe one day I will come to my senses or something that and have kids, yeah right .
It's not the same, but it's no less true. Sacrifice is sacrifice. To say otherwise is insulting, and I would think a reason some people prefer not to deal with parents. I think too many people make their kids wants their number one priority, to the detriment of society, but I suppose that's for another time and thread.
I agree with love being love. Of course love of a child is different than love of a parent than love of a spouse etc. It doesn't or shouldn't negate the love and it sounds like that's what you mean, floridadreamer.
I too find that insulting.
As for the influence of children on a potential relationship: at my age (63), the only thing that'd probably (not definitely) be a deal breaker for me is if he (the parent) was still supporting the adult child.
Hmmm, this got me wondering how old the average person responding to this thread is.
My guess is almost all of you who are saying "NO" (me included) would change their tune if they found themselves 40+ and single. Options are what they are at that age.
What would your opinion be if the kids were grown and out of the house??
For me that would be the only exception. If the guy is older and has adult age kids that are self sufficient and living on their own, ok. It also depends on how much I like the guy.
My GOD!! Everyone has preferences!! Who cares if one refuses to date someone because he/she have kids.. The world will go on.. Date who you want to date.. It's that simple..
Hmmm, this got me wondering how old the average person responding to this thread is.
My guess is almost all of you who are saying "NO" (me included) would change their tune if they found themselves 40+ and single. Options are what they are at that age.
What would your opinion be if the kids were grown and out of the house??
I am 41 and nope I still wouldn't date a man with kids, even grown kids. While with grown kids he may not still be supporting them (though in this economy he might)there is still the issues like if the kids move back home, get married, etc. Not as much drama but still can be bad.
My issue with dating dads isn't even the kids but the exes and him. The fact is in most cases he will still have dealings with the ex and might even be supporting her. He might be fighting her in regards to custody or child support or something else. He would definitely have to pay for the kids (unless he's a deadbeat then he's scum)which would mean less money for OUR household. I might even have to support his kids or his ex. Not to mention he may not want to remarry or be open to more kids (biological or adopted). Plus in the event I don't have kids I will always resent the fact he had kids with his ex but not me. If he had kids but wasn't married (especially multiple kids)I would wonder why he didn't marry and I would know we were incompatible religion wise. That goes for divorce too and I am unable to marry someone who is divorced without an annulment and am not willing to forfeit a wedding because of this (I'd rather be alone than have a civil wedding).
There are still single men at 40 and even older and yes even never married childless men who want to marry and open to kids. They are harder to find but out there.
They are a deal-breaker for me. And I say that not because I don't like kids--I love kids--but I just think I'd be a terrible "parental figure" in a child's life. I'm great with kids as long as "the time their parent picks them up" is in the foreseeable future. So I'm thinking about the child here when I say it's a deal-breaker. I couldn't have kids in my life as an ongoing thing. I feel like it wouldn't be fair to the child(ren) to have me dating their mom.
So many people saying that someone having a child/children is a deal breaker. In a way this surprises me because most people have at least one child by age 40. The older one gets the harder it will be to find someone that has no kids or grown children. I hardly know anyone that doesn't have at least one child.
So many people saying that someone having a child/children is a deal breaker. In a way this surprises me because most people have at least one child by age 40. The older one gets the harder it will be to find someone that has no kids or grown children. I hardly know anyone that doesn't have at least one child.
So many people saying that someone having a child/children is a deal breaker. In a way this surprises me because most people have at least one child by age 40. The older one gets the harder it will be to find someone that has no kids or grown children. I hardly know anyone that doesn't have at least one child.
Not a big deal. If you're 30+ and have your stuff together, it's relatively easy to find a woman who doesn't have kids. Look for the career women, there are plenty of them who decided to pursue an education/career instead of having children (come across them in real life and on dating sites frequently, plenty of childless women 25-45!!!!). You can also always date younger. Plenty of women are okay with dating men 5-10 yrs older. My roofer just married a woman 10 yrs younger than him. He's 38, she's 28, and has no kids
Some of us men want to start families from scratch and share that experience with our partner and aren't interested in "Ready-Made Families".
It shouldn't bother you women that much. Plenty of you have your own dealbreakers/turn-offs. Just find a guy who is okay with it. A co-worker of mine has kids, but refuses to date men with kids. I don't feel sorry for her one bit lol
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