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WOW!!!
While Larry #2 is really hot and all, I would have to choose Larry #1 because I like guys with dark hair!!! LOL!!!
To the OP~ I have never had a guy friend that I was extremely close to that wasn't gay! Most heterosexual men aren't looking for friends, their looking for flings!
Trust but verify. This can all go pear shaped in a split second, such as a night out on the town where drunken lust sets in. Next thing you know you're being told "it just happened" and "we were drunk" and other lame excuses. Trust me, this happens ALL the time with women that have male friends. Maybe your wife is the exception, but I guarantee you if she's attractive and he's got his stuff together that at one point or another one of them tried to put the moves on the other. The may have even hooked up at one point and will take that secret to their graves denying it all the way there.
Anyway, there are red flags, but one on it's own isn't much to worry about. I'd still keep an eye on how much she talks about this guy, but as you described it things seem calm enough. A good rule of thumb though is any time a woman has another man on her brain more than her SO something bad either just happened or is about to.
This is the best, most straight-forward advice given to you in this thread.
Pay attention to it; he's got it painted very accurately. If you want to avoid even the sensation of "I told you so" or "how could I have been so stupid" down the line, THIS is your chance -- by paying attention to what you were just told here. Right here. Up above. This thing I've quoted in my post.
I would not have an issue, but that's based on my own background and the fact that I have female friends. It's natural for one to be "jealous" when the attention of your partner is shared with another person.
Perhaps she's seeking a different quality in her friend, this may or may not be cause for concern. It's really a personal factor -- how comfortable are you in your relationship? How long have you been married? etc...
This is a recipe for disaster. I can guarantee you almost 100% that if the shoe was on the other foot then there'd be an uproar on her part.
She WILL cheat on you someday. Can't you see the signs already?
The responses so far are very interesting at best and somewhat depressing. The general feeling is that if one is married up to fifty percent of the population is off limits to us for friendship because they are a different sex.
It seems like everyone is convinced that Larry, my wife's best friend, is really only interested in bedding her down and he is really just looking for the right opportunity. Can't a man and woman just enjoy each other in pleasant conversation or have fun with recreational activities without the fear the other is going to make a sexual move on the other? What a sad state of affairs!
The responses so far are very interesting at best and somewhat depressing. The general feeling is that if one is married up to fifty percent of the population is off limits to us for friendship because they are a different sex.
It seems like everyone is convinced that Larry, my wife's best friend, is really only interested in bedding her down and he is really just looking for the right opportunity. Can't a man and woman just enjoy each other in pleasant conversation or have fun with recreational activities without the fear the other is going to make a sexual move on the other? What a sad state of affairs!
BUDDY: If you want to believe that it is normal for a wife to give more attention to some other guy than her own husband,then continue to live in denial. If she really cared about you, she would be giving you her attention, not Larry. Also, most "healthy" couples are best friends naturally.If things were OK, you would be her best friend, not Larry.
I'm usually very open minded about things, but I'd be wary if I were you. I can't imagine myself having such great chemistry with a guy I met not so long ago and not end up having doubts about my current relationship. I can't imagine my man having such a great new female friend and not thinking about her in other ways than platonic ones. I guess both scenarios are possible, but IMO they're both highly unlikely.
Maybe your relationship is in great shape right now, but a moment or a few days of crisis would suffice to contemplate that maybe your oh-so-great-friend would understand you better... And it all goes downhill from there. When we're fragile, these things can happen and if there's a nearby chance, they probably will happen.
I am a guy and my best friend is a girl. I have no romantic feelings toward her at all. It might not be probable, but it is possible for a man and a woman to be completely platonic.
BUDDY: If you want to believe that it is normal for a wife to give more attention to some other guy than her own husband,then continue to live in denial. If she really cared about you, she would be giving you her attention, not Larry. Also, most "healthy" couples are best friends naturally.If things were OK, you would be her best friend, not Larry.
If you read my original post I state that I am my wife's best friend but her friend Larry is the her best friend she is not married to.
I still do not see the problem. My wife still spends much more time with me than Larry and is much closer to me than Larry. But when they do see each other or talk by phone, about twice a week, they just enjoy each others company immensely. They have great conversational chemistry. They just love talking to each other and laugh and have the greatest time. Why would I want to insist that my wife drop her best friend due to some unfounded fear that Larry wants to have sex with my wife and all the friendship is really about sex?
Many women have best friends who are female that they have a special bond and enjoy each others company so much. Why can't that "best friend" be someone of the opposite sex?
My best friend is a man. So what ? It IS possible to have a deep friendship with a person of the opposite sex. I have no sexual attraction to him and he has none to me.
Unless you are feeling insecure already about your marriage or your wife has given you reasons to doubt her fidelity what is the problem ?
I have never really ever been able to truly bond with most women and I find I get on much better with men.
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This is crazy
