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I have a good frined of mine who lives in Connecticut, we lived on the same block until I moved to Florida and we have always kept in touch and both do to this day
But for the past 4 or 5 years he has been questioning his sexuality and it has really been eating away at him
He says he as always been interested in women but he has had gay rumors swirling around him virtually his entire life. He had these rumors in school and now deals with them at his job daily.
When we were 14 he confided in me that he enjoyed cross-dressing for the sexual arousal he got out of it, though he hasn't done it in about 4 years he admits he still has occasional thoughts about it
Around the time he stopped secretly cross-dressing he told me had been experiencing a strange new atraction to men, he wasnt sure if it was physical or not he just knew some sort of attraction was there. He still seems interested in dating and having sex with women though
And then about 3 years ago he got into transsexual pornography and has almost but abandoned looking at naked women to looking at male-to female transsexuals. He still had sexual interest in women though and was still having some sort of attraction to men
He met a transsexual at a club once and had intercourse with her and enjoyed it. He has had sex with women as well but not men
He has had several crushes on men but never acted on them and when he was propositioned by gay men for sex he always rejected it. Even though he has had sex with feminine transsexuals, sex with a masculine male doesnt do anything for him or so he told me.
Honestly he feels like he has to label himself either straight gay or bi. And its really getting to him now. What do you guys think, is my friend gay?
I think he needs to get over labels. That's not being a smartass. Its just silly that he is so open in some ways and yet tries to label himself and pin himself down.
He needs to let himself go and truly explore his sexuality. Right now he's so busy trying to fit into a box, he has confused himself. He thinks no woman will accept him if he like to dress in women's clothes so he stopped doing that. The truth is she won't be easy to find, but she is findable. If he is into transgenderism, he shoild go to a LGBST counselor or center where whatever his sexuality is he will be openly accepted and he can find his true sexuality. He may very well be bi or he may be a straight male who is forcing himself to date the only "women" he feels will accept his cross dressing - another man who dresses as a female. I think it's the latter since he is only turned on by very feminine transgenders.
I wouldn't say he is 100% straight, but then again sexuality is fluid and not a black and white phenomenon.
I think your friend's sexual orientation is just complex, and not something definitively straight, gay, or bisexual. it's perhaps just as he is. Lots of guys who like transsexuals don't self-identify as gay anyhow, and to be fair it is a grey area. it could be they like the feminine form of a male-to-female transsexual, or they like the penis, who knows?
Has he turned down sex with men simply because he doesn't find their "type" attractive? (maybe he would prefer feminine men) Or is he simply not interested in their equipment? I agree as well he seems way more worried about what he will be labeled. Is sleeping with a transexual the same as sleeping with a man? I don't think it would be considered the same. There are actually male transexuals that sleep with women, would they be considered gay or straight? This conversation could go on forever, and I honestly don't think you'd have an answer to the question, "Is my friend gay?"
i also wanted to add that he has a lesbian cousin who is always telling him he should "just go gay" because he'd "be happier that way"
dating for him has always been a very troubled field for him. he has a huge problem with his self esteem and confidnece, emotionally distant alcoholic father, apathetic mother, not a lot of suportive people in his life, hardly any friends too
and the girls who he has gotten dates or had sex with have used him and then broke his heart. he doesnt seem to have a problem appraoching attractive women, he just doesnt have confidence in himself and thinks she wil automatically dislike him and reject him
and usually whenever he did go on a first date with a girl it was also the last
and he also has lost interest in cross dressing as far as i know. he told me he no longer sees the appeal of it
I have a good frined of mine who lives in Connecticut, we lived on the same block until I moved to Florida and we have always kept in touch and both do to this day
But for the past 4 or 5 years he has been questioning his sexuality and it has really been eating away at him
He says he as always been interested in women but he has had gay rumors swirling around him virtually his entire life. He had these rumors in school and now deals with them at his job daily.
When we were 14 he confided in me that he enjoyed cross-dressing for the sexual arousal he got out of it, though he hasn't done it in about 4 years he admits he still has occasional thoughts about it
Around the time he stopped secretly cross-dressing he told me had been experiencing a strange new atraction to men, he wasnt sure if it was physical or not he just knew some sort of attraction was there. He still seems interested in dating and having sex with women though
And then about 3 years ago he got into transsexual pornography and has almost but abandoned looking at naked women to looking at male-to female transsexuals. He still had sexual interest in women though and was still having some sort of attraction to men
He met a transsexual at a club once and had intercourse with her and enjoyed it. He has had sex with women as well but not men
He has had several crushes on men but never acted on them and when he was propositioned by gay men for sex he always rejected it. Even though he has had sex with feminine transsexuals, sex with a masculine male doesnt do anything for him or so he told me.
Honestly he feels like he has to label himself either straight gay or bi. And its really getting to him now. What do you guys think, is my friend gay?
Yes youhe probably is.
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