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I already mentioned this in a previous thread. No. I would not expect it to remain a secret from the spouse. It has nothing to do with "not being allowed to have any secrets from their husband or wife under the expectations of marriage". It's just that good marriages, don't have such secrets.
That's not right though, is it. I have deep secrets between me & my mates that I will not under any circumstances share it with my wife [future wife that is] or even girlfriend.
On topic, if my friend/colleague/relative came to me asking for advice in regards to a very sensitive topic, I will keep that between me & said person. My wife has absolutely nothing to do with it, and does not need to know. It does not affect her in any way. Similarly, I don't need, nor do I want, to know about the secrets between her & her friends, as long as it has absolutely nothing to do with me or anyone close to me.
I am of the school of thought that my secrets are my wife's secrets. Unless it is going to be an attempt at a surprise party :P
However, this is easy to do since I have 100% trust in her. So, I guess the answer to the OP is that you could not share something in confidence with me. But, it would be in "The Vault" - but one more person would know
I already mentioned this in a previous thread. No. I would not expect it to remain a secret from the spouse. It has nothing to do with "not being allowed to have any secrets from their husband or wife under the expectations of marriage". It's just that good marriages, don't have such secrets.
I already mentioned this in a previous thread. No. I would not expect it to remain a secret from the spouse. It has nothing to do with "not being allowed to have any secrets from their husband or wife under the expectations of marriage". It's just that good marriages, don't have such secrets.
I disagree. If a spouse is told something in confidence by a friend why should that spouse be expected to "share" it? Not about keeping secrets because I'm assuming the confidence has nothing to do with the marriage.
Even after almost 30 years there are things I learned in the military that my spouse has no clue about. She doesn't have the proper security clearance.
That's not right though, is it. I have deep secrets between me & my mates that I will not under any circumstances share it with my wife [future wife that is] or even girlfriend.
On topic, if my friend/colleague/relative came to me asking for advice in regards to a very sensitive topic, I will keep that between me & said person. My wife has absolutely nothing to do with it, and does not need to know. It does not affect her in any way. Similarly, I don't need, nor do I want, to know about the secrets between her & her friends, as long as it has absolutely nothing to do with me or anyone close to me.
It may not be right for you, but it is right for me. I discussed this very thing with my team at work today, they are all married, and they all felt the same way that I do. I would never ever assume anything differently of anyone else. If I could not deal with the spouse knowing the information, then I'd never confide in the first place.
I disagree. If a spouse is told something in confidence by a friend why should that spouse be expected to "share" it? Not about keeping secrets because I'm assuming the confidence has nothing to do with the marriage.
Even after almost 30 years there are things I learned in the military that my spouse has no clue about. She doesn't have the proper security clearance.
I am not saying that you must repeat every thing you hear. I am saying, that in normal conversation between a husband and a wife, things CAN get mentioned, and no one should expect that to never happen. It does. All the time. And I don't think anyone was referring to government secrets here.
I am not saying that you must repeat every thing you hear. I am saying, that in normal conversation between a husband and a wife, things CAN get mentioned, and no one should expect that to never happen. It does. All the time. And I don't think anyone was referring to government secrets here.
Exactly.
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It's just that good marriages, don't have such secrets.
I am not saying that you must repeat every thing you hear. 
I am saying, that in normal conversation between a husband and a wife, things CAN get mentioned, and no one should expect that to never happen. It does. All the time. And I don't think anyone was referring to government secrets here. 
Exactly.
