Affair (other man in your house) and legal rights (dating, girlfriends, marry)
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If you are in Texas you probably could have shot the guy and gotten away with it.
Came home, weird noises, pull out my gun and shot before asking questions... and the world keeps turning.
I think you did the right thing...the wisest thing. And you dodged a HUGE bullet. She was beyond disrespectful, as was the guy. But neither was worth dealing with the repercussions you would have had if you had assaulted him.
I wish you the best in finding a new girlfriend with character and who appreciates you.
State laws vary but in general, you would have no legal right to deck him. As someone who has studied martial arts, you should be aware of this.
At one point in time, you would have been well within your rights to thrash this man for cheating with your wife (not gf, perish the scandlous thought) but these are not said time. Your life has to be in danger or you have a reasonable fear that it was in danger and neither qualify here.
It's just as well. No matter how tough you are, someone else is tougher and even Bruce Lee has to fear bullets.
I like the way you put it Mathguy, that's a good perspective to look at it from. However, I don't think I'll be sending the a-hole a case of beer anytime soon
Logically, it was probably for the best since we were talking about marriage in the near future. Since this had been going on for awhile, I can only assume the guy knew that my girlfriend was in a relationship and didn't care that he was wrecking a home. That's what makes me angry at him. Also, to do that in my own house... let's just say disrespectful is a mild way of describing his actions.
Yep. I figured you would have some insight as to how much he knew about the situation.
I still think you dodged a HUGE bullet. Hey, I had 2 college buddies that got married to psycho nymphos....long story but they were in our circle of college friends. Both gals were serial cheaters and full MENTAL...and the marriages eventually ended. The one guy had a kid and got to pay child support to psycho ho.....so long story short....you were given a golden ticket my friend.
He's not the problem - she was the problem so direct your anger at her as she is the one that disrespected you and your relationship. If she didn't care why should anyone else. He didn't cross a line he wasn't invited to cross so keep that in mind.
Anyway, here's my question. ... Would I have legally been able to beat the crap out of the home-wrecker guy? I really wanted to teach him a lesson right there, was angry enough where I was about to, but then decided that he was not worth getting into trouble over. I figured it would probably be illegal.
Why? She's the one that cheated and betrayed you, not him. She's 100% responsible for what happened, pure and simple. He was just along for the ride. Even if he knew she had a bf/husband it doesn't matter as she's the betrayer. If it wasn't him it'd be someone else.
And, legally, she most likely didn't have to leave either.. She could have stayed and there is nothing you can do. If she has established residency, in most states, if they want to fight it, they can contest it and youd have to legally evict them
To make a long story short, I came home early from a business trip and I caught my then girlfriend in bed with another man. Needless to say, I was furious. Apparently the cheating had been going on for a few months. It had been a 3-year relationship and I never saw this coming. I was in complete shock.
I ordered the man out of the house and told my girlfriend that she had 30 minutes to gather all of her belongings and never return (I fully own the house, she had just been periodically staying there time to time). It was very painful doing so, but I knew it was what I had to do. Once you can't trust someone, you have nothing.
Anyway, here's my question. I'm relatively strong 6' 180 and can bench around 305. I'm not the best fighter in the country, but I'm pretty good, I've won a few local and statewide Tae-Kwon-Do tournaments. Would I have legally been able to beat the crap out of the home-wrecker guy? I really wanted to teach him a lesson right there, was angry enough where I was about to, but then decided that he was not worth getting into trouble over. I figured it would probably be illegal. Keep in mind that I am not a violent person and have not been in a fist fight since I was 12 years old.
I started wondering: What my rights would have been in this situation? Would he have been considered a trespasser / intruder given that he was invited into the house, but obviously not welcome by the house owner? Would physically fighting with him have been against the law?
I have not seen either one of them since that day, and plan on never seeing either person again. But sometimes I think back and regret not at least punching the guy.....
Should I have done more? What would you have done if you were me? What would be the right thing to do in this situation?
You did the right thing OP by kicking them out! He didn't threaten your life in anyway and wasn't an intruder. Frankly, the b*****d isn't worth the ammo or the jail time. Your strikes will always splatter a POS, so that isn't the answer either! At least you found out now she was a tramp before you got married and had kids! Good for you buddy!
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