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Old 04-24-2019, 08:05 AM
 
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Or stop by for lunch after the mass and confirmation.
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Old 04-24-2019, 08:12 AM
 
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I can’t. She said to be there by 5:30 to get seats. I have to rush from work. You can’t really walk into the church when the confirmation starts. There isn’t an exact time I don’t think.
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Old 04-24-2019, 08:16 AM
 
Location: Florida
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Originally Posted by Adriank7 View Post
I can’t. She said to be there by 5:30 to get seats. I have to rush from work. You can’t really walk into the church when the confirmation starts. There isn’t an exact time I don’t think.
You could just ask her about the scheduling. If its not until after a long mass you'll know when you can arrive
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Old 04-24-2019, 08:18 AM
 
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So what are you listing about? You have obviously decided to go. I don’t see what you are trying to get at.
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Old 04-24-2019, 11:07 PM
 
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Originally Posted by gus2 View Post
I think friends want to share big life events with other friends. In my family, confirmation didn't last 2.5 hours but it was a big deal with a party afterwards, etc.

You could give a card/gift and not go to the whole church thing.
I'm an atheist, and hate churches and synagogues (never been in a mosque). I have also been to friend's confirmations and bar mitzvahs. It's a big deal for them, and even though I think both of their religions are wacko as all get out (as are all other religions), be the friend they think you are. Just go. I sit there and wonder, "Do they really believe all of this crap?". Just go.

The food is usually good anyways afterwards.
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Old 04-25-2019, 08:14 AM
 
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Originally Posted by normstad View Post
It's a big deal for them, and even though I think both of their religions are wacko as all get out (as are all other religions), be the friend they think you are.


I am comfortable doing a lot of things alone. When people invite me to things, I go because I want to spend time with them. It doesn't matter what we're doing. Besides, you might find out you actually like the thing they're inviting you to. Friendship/love is about showing up.
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Old 04-25-2019, 02:08 PM
 
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I do go to most things. But rushing there right after work and sitting there for 3 hours (have to get there early for seats I was told) just isn’t something I want to do. They keep asking me if my husband is going also and seem angry because he probably won’t.
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Old 04-26-2019, 10:18 AM
 
Location: California side of the Sierras
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Originally Posted by Adriank7 View Post
I do go to most things. But rushing there right after work and sitting there for 3 hours (have to get there early for seats I was told) just isn’t something I want to do. They keep asking me if my husband is going also and seem angry because he probably won’t.
Or maybe they are just annoyed because they need a count and you aren't giving them a definite answer? Just give them a firm "Unfortunately, Seymour will not be able to join us."
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Old 04-26-2019, 10:29 AM
 
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Originally Posted by Adriank7 View Post
No not venting. Just wondering why some parents expect you do go to their children’s events. I would personally know that people aren’t usually interested and not put them in the predicament of feeling like they had to go.

I think your outlook is not the norm. Maybe I'm wrong though. I know that your outlook is not my outlook.


If I have a GOOD friend who is inviting me to baptisms, confirmations, school plays, etc...than I would go. I HAVE gone. If it's just someone at work who asks me to these things, I probably would NOT attend. But for friends and family? Of course, if I'm invited, I'm going to try and go.


Heck, just very recently, my husband and I went to our DIL's stepfather's funeral. Even though we're not particularly close to my DIL's parents. (No hard feelings at all...we KNEW him, and have had them to our house...but we're not particularly FRIENDS.)


BUT it's my DIL's parents. Which means family, and it's a sign of respect.
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Old 04-26-2019, 10:37 AM
 
13,262 posts, read 8,029,628 times
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Originally Posted by Adriank7 View Post
I do go to most things. But rushing there right after work and sitting there for 3 hours (have to get there early for seats I was told) just isn’t something I want to do. They keep asking me if my husband is going also and seem angry because he probably won’t.

You know what? You can't help it if your husband doesn't want to go, and it's not your responsibility to make excuses for him, and it's not your fault that he's not going.


I can totally understand how this is going to be a long night for you, and I can totally understand how you're not looking forward to it...I'd feel the same way, I'm sure. But you're committed, and this is what we do for friends and family.
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