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I still enjoy this forum. I am still at 63 (63 1/2 as of yesterday) a few years away from retirement. I talk with my hubby about things I read on here. Some topics I skip over but some really provoke some thought.
On a lighter note -- I'm still reeling about NewEnglandGirl -- I wondered in the back of my mind why I hadn't seen her post since I've been back (very recently) but I figured she had just 'moved on' -- anyway, on a lighter note, if you're living in Monterey Bay, I want to meet you in person too. In fact, I may move in with you.
As I've said -- WAY TOO MANY TIMES in different topics/threads -- I lived in CA for 57 years. Grew up in San Diego. Went to HS (the last two years) in Northern CA -- Concord, east of Berkeley/Oakland, and worked for CA government in OC for almost 30 years (lived in Long Beach, while working in OC, for a few years after my first divorce). I wasn't crazy about OC because it was SO political-party-opposite-mine and because, other than the coastal areas, it was just so ugly. Whoever designed OC must have worked OT in The Ugly Department. However, I loved my job and my coworkes, loved raising my family there, and made REALLY good, close friends there. But by the time 1990 came around -- I found coastal Southern CA an unbearable place to live. For example, in 1965, SD has a population of approx half million people. It now has well over 3 million -- close to 3.5 million -- in the same amount of space, of course. Too many people and too much traffic for me. And one of the other reasons I retired early was to get out of CA -- earthquakes being one of the reasons -- 57 years of earthquakes and the looming Big One -- that was more than enough for me.
ANYWAY, of course I remember Monterey Bay. I drove, during my time in CA, Hwy 1 many times. Until it took forever just to get from OC to the beginning of Hwy 1. And I loved Monterey Bay. (On an even lighter note: wow, you're not broke in retirement, are you? LOLOLOLOLOL)
And altho' I could afford to live in coastal Southern CA even now -- I couldn't begin to afford to live in Monterey Bay, AND I'm a Big City Gal, so as much I enjoyed visiting there, I wouldn't live there. But, still, I envy you. That whole Northern CA coastline is JUST SO BEAUTIFUL. And, oh god, altho', after 15 years away, I still miss the ocean at times. Even when my kids were growing up, I was down at the beach, before dawn, probably 40 weekend mornings every year for 27 years -- and that's probably a conservative estimate. I would go in the rain! LOL (I came home to my husband making breakfast for the kids -- and then we all went to the games my kids played all their youth -- baseball, football, soccer.)
I'm sorry to go on and on. I mean, none of this is interesting AT ALL, is it. LOLOLOLOLOL But in the 15 years I've been out of CA, I've never 'met', in person or online, a person from coastal Northern CA. And only someone who lives (or lived) near to the beach can know what a gift and joy that living near the ocean, for so many years, really was. But would I go back to live in CA? There isn't enough money in the world that could make me do that. Well, if it were the 50s, 60s, or 70s, I'd go back.
Robyn55 died as well, FYI. Escort Rider and Curmudgeon have also passed away.
I remember when Escort Rider and Curmudgeon passed away -- or rather, I 'stopped by' C-D about 12-18 months after they passed away and found out. Neither of them were my favorite people, but they were good men, and they were 'staples' of C-D. The news was a real, very sad shock to me. NEG -- that's a real shock too. I don't remember Riverbird nearly as well, but I do remember the name.
Thank you for filling me in. Do you know what NewEnglandGirl died of?? I don't remember her being all that old. Well, I'll be a bit bummed for the rest of the day.
You know, I don't mind my own death -- the only thing I hate about getting old is other people, who I care about -- and even some that I don't care much about -- dying. I never ever knew that Escort Rider wasn't well -- I got on C-D about 2008 and stayed for about three years, because I was sick and a shut-in at home for that time, and he, Curmudgeon and NEG were just always 'there' -- or 'here'. All three of them -- all four of them -- it is a real loss. Sigh.
NewEnglandGirl and RiverBird were one and the same . . . NEG changed her name to RB a few years before she passed. I believe she passed from melanoma. We were all shocked as she was a very private person and never mentioned it, to my knowledge. The details of the passings of the other three have been discussed in the Retirement Forum and a search will bring them up. I don't want to derail this thread so I'll leave it to you to find those posts.
Yes, the face of the Retirement Forum has changed, or evolved, over time. I too miss the "old gang" but find there are others stepping up to offer thought-provoking posts as well. Change is always hard but I believe that the Retirement Forum will keep going as retirement concerns are never ending.
NewEnglandGirl and RiverBird were one and the same . . . NEG changed her name to RB a few years before she passed. I believe she passed from melanoma. We were all shocked as she was a very private person and never mentioned it, to my knowledge. The details of the passings of the other three have been discussed in the Retirement Forum and a search will bring them up. I don't want to derail this thread so I'll leave it to you to find those posts.
Yes, the face of the Retirement Forum has changed, or evolved, over time. I too miss the "old gang" but find there are others stepping up to offer thought-provoking posts as well. Change is always hard but I believe that the Retirement Forum will keep going as retirement concerns are never ending.
I know the details of the others. Thanks for the info. And, actually, I wasn't crazy about C-D my first time around (I was simply sick at home for three years), and I'm finding I'm even less crazy about it now. I'd probably never have come back, after the first three years, but every so often I get an e-mail notice from C-D saying that I have 'rep' -- and who can't resist finding out why we got 'rep', right? Most of those times, I have just seen what I wanted to see, not posted and left again. I don't know why I came back about a month ago. But I already know I've outlived my welcome here. LLLLLLLLLLLOOOOOLLLLLLLL I'm being sarcastic.
Yes, I am Wisteria. I came in recently to check and see if the old thread was there. I see it changed dramatically. So many wonderful women with wonderful ideas. We all had so much in common. Being a woman alone is very different from a man alone. That is why the thread was for women. For years, it was respected that women can have many differences in retirement. Many are single or divorced. Many do not earn as much as men. Safety is always an issue for women.
I loved our old thread. I met many women there and some in person. We had a circle of friends and shared our experiences, our ideas and our troubles. It really was a wonderful place to meet other women in a similar situation, with (often) lower incomes, and no real support.
Our thread did not exclude men because they are male, but because women generally do not earn as much. We also have features most men do not have to deal with: being alone, walking alone, being attacked, being physically smaller, assaulted, lower incomes, no family support, younger children who need help, trying to figure out how to make it on a small income.
We shared our joys, our pains, and our ideas. And we had a lot of fun!
Why they felt it had to be "politically correct" to include men, I do not understand. It is obvious that women and men are different. I am very, very tiny. I can't walk around at night without worrying about being attacked. Men can fight. They are different. Their needs are different. If someone was upset about it, they should have just had a parallel thread for men. They are different from women, and I'm sure it would have been helpful.
Yes, we are all human beings, however, there is a reason women are called women and men are called men - they are different kinds of people.
Women also respect and admire other women who can understand situations that men don't generally encounter. Some of us met in person. Others of us connected online. We followed each other's ups and downs. It was a true community of like-minded, kind, thoughtful and helpful women.
I miss the caring and sharing of that old thread. I remember when NewEnglandGirl died. I remember Robyn moving from Oregon to Florida. I remember meeting others in person.
If men and women were the same, with the same physiques, the same incomes, the same responsibilities (women are generally the caretakers), and did not have numerous other differences, then it would have made sense. But we had a real community. Many of us met others in person who were on that thread. We became friends.
I hope that those who are now monitoring City-Data will be politically-correct in recognizing that there are many differences between males and females. It is not prejudice; it is reality. It is correct to realize that men and women are different (otherwise, I suppose we'd all just be a generic "person"). ...
"Political correctness" had absolutely nothing to do with the change. This revisionist history has come up before and I addressed it two years ago. Here's what I wrote then:
That's not the way I recall it at all. There was one man who asked if he could join and the women who regularly hung out in that thread (similar to the chat thread) welcomed him. Then the moderator made a change to the title of the thread that was more inclusive and for some reason all hell broke loose. Several women got upset that the thread title no longer emphasized that the thread was for and about women. I believe it was also changed to a "regular" thread from a "stickie" as well. That caused dissention as well. A different moderator subsequently closed the thread because he stated that it had drifted way off topic from its original purpose.
The closure had nothing to do with "MEN complaining about it being for women."
I avoid the financial posts like the plague. This is the last place I'd come for financial advice or to offer it. I wouldn't freely share that kind of information or assume I have the solution to someone's problem. I've seen some rude and somewhat pompous exchanges when the financial "experts" get on a roll. I prefer the more social and non-financial content of the postings.
Well-put! I totally agree. Some of us are just not "numbers people" (I wish I was, though!)
There is so much more to Retirement than just the numbers. I really enjoy the vast differences in how we all experience our own unique retirement, and how we deal with the issues it brings.
I don't care how repetitive it gets. As someone else said, each post brings something new to the topic. If I'm bored, I just skip it. As for bickering, that's just more entertainment!
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