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It's not very adult to expose a child to disharmony. No matter how you strive for equality, neither parent should be creating a disharmonious situation. That's just childish if they do. You need to do what is best for the child not what mom or dad wants. It ceases to be about what mom or dad want once the child comes into the picture.
Oh, I totally disagree.
You mentioned awhile back and in another thread children who think they're the reason the sun rises and sets? This, my dear, is IT.
One does what's best for the family as a whole, assuming one wants a healthy family. No single individual (or even dyad or triad) gets to call the shots. Start letting little Isabella call the shots, and she'll end up a spoilt, self-centered little git, no matter how she's educated.
But boy, have we gone afield. The Post Police will be arriving soon, I fear.
You mentioned awhile back and in another thread children who think they're the reason the sun rises and sets? This, my dear, is IT.
One does what's best for the family as a whole, assuming one wants a healthy family. No single individual (or even dyad or triad) gets to call the shots. Start letting little Isabella call the shots, and she'll end up a spoilt, self-centered little git, no matter how she's educated.
But boy, have we gone afield. The Post Police will be arriving soon, I fear.
Not at all. Parents being adult enough to make the best of a situation doesn't create kids who think the sun rises and sets on them. Spoiling kids does. I'm simply talking about adults not creating disharmony here. Why would any ADULT do so? It's not an adult thing to do. Adults deal with their situations and don't create disharomony in the home because they didn't get what they wanted.
I'm not talking about having kids call the shots. I never once suggested that. I'm saying adults should act like adults. There is no reason for any situation adults find themselves in to result in adults behaving in ways that create disharmony in the household. Adults should be above that.
I'm talking about adults doing what is best for kids and NOT causing disharmony because they don't like the situation, not kids calling the shots. I've never suggested kids should call the shots. Deciding what is best for a family seldom involves even asking the kids, however, they are at the heart of the decision. It's a logical desicion not an emotional one. I'm not talking about moms beleifs about what she thinks her kids want and acting on that. I'm talking about really deciding what is best. If you're doing what is best, you're at no risk of spoiling the kids and raising them to believe the sun rises and sets on them. That wouldn't be best for them.
Not at all. Parents being adult enough to make the best of a situation doesn't create kids who think the sun rises and sets on them. Spoiling kids does. I'm simply talking about adults not creating disharmony here. Why would any ADULT do so? It's not an adult thing to do. Adults deal with their situations and don't create disharomony in the home because they didn't get what they wanted.
I'm not talking about having kids call the shots. I never once suggested that. I'm saying adults should act like adults. There is no reason for any situation adults find themselves in to result in adults behaving in ways that create disharmony in the household. Adults should be above that.
I'm talking about adults doing what is best for kids and NOT causing disharmony because they don't like the situation, not kids calling the shots. I've never suggested kids should call the shots. Deciding what is best for a family seldom involves even asking the kids, however, they are at the heart of the decision. It's a logical desicion not an emotional one. I'm not talking about moms beleifs about what she thinks her kids want and acting on that. I'm talking about really deciding what is best. If you're doing what is best, you're at no risk of spoiling the kids and raising them to believe the sun rises and sets on them. That wouldn't be best for them.
Disharmony happens, Ivory. It's a human thing. People get tired, stressed, overwhelmed, ill, and cranky. You don't cope by pretending not to see it, you cope by handling it. (Well, or at least, functional people do.)
So if I am reading this current thread correctly, merit pay for teachers is a concept designed to reward teachers who have the appropriate parenting skills and marital relationships at home. Hmmmm is this what it is all about?
Yup and well before public education was rooted and established. Wonder if there is a connection?
Hard telling. I remember hearing that at some point (the thirties? forties?) married teachers were forced to resign, and when I was small (the early sixties) pregnant teachers were out before they started showing. I'm also of an age where bright high school girls were told "teaching is a good career for a woman" (unless you were good at math, in which case the same was said about nursing). So I'm not sure when the sea changes occurred along the way.
So if I am reading this current thread correctly, merit pay for teachers is a concept designed to reward teachers who have the appropriate parenting skills and marital relationships at home. Hmmmm is this what it is all about?
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Momma_bear
If someone could get public schools to function this way it would be great. Unfortunately, everything in public schools is driven by the state test scores.
Until the state is willing to standardize educational resources, standardized testing will never work. Students who do not enjoy the same socioeconomic/educational resources cannot be expected to perform as well as more privileged students on the same test. Our school-funding system needs a complete overhaul.
Until the state is willing to standardize educational resources, standardized testing will never work. Students who do not enjoy the same socioeconomic/educational resources cannot be expected to perform as well as more privileged students on the same test. Our school-funding system needs a complete overhaul.
They will never be able to. As long as there are PTAs with deep pockets,wealthier neighborhoods will have more resources, and will attract a somewhat more competitive pool of teachers.
Until the state is willing to standardize educational resources, standardized testing will never work. Students who do not enjoy the same socioeconomic/educational resources cannot be expected to perform as well as more privileged students on the same test. Our school-funding system needs a complete overhaul.
You realize that many states have done this. In fact per pupil spending in many urban districts is the highest in their respective states. Now what are the results of that spending? Have you looked at per pupil expenditures in DC? This is not a path you probably want to go down unless you are a conservative wanting to reduce tax dollars spent on education. http://www.cato-at-liberty.org/2009/...-epic-failure/
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