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The men in DC are also looking for someone wealthy with power and an elite education but who is thin and usually plain jane. It is status for guys in DC. A guy can be awful and still find many women young and old.
DC is a melting pot. I've dated the whole spectrum. Just this week I went out with a CRNA (Certified Registered Nurse Anesthetist) who generally make around 200k in the area and she went to Columbia. On paper she sounds great and during the date she complimented me, couldn't keep her hands off of me, and said she wanted to go on another date with me. She even brought up sexual things she wanted to do with me. Second date set for tonight and she said yesterday the hospital was shortstaffed so she was on call. She said after Saturday afternoon she was free so I mention Saturday night and she says she would be too tired after the half marathon. I shot a text back offering Sunday and get no response. This doesn't make any sense from the kind of date we had the other night other than the fact she is a tease and likes attention.
Another woman I dated making over 150k (I say this because they are both in the same income bracket as me) and upon meeting her she reached out her hand for a handshake instead of a hug (which I gave her anyway). After a while I went in for a kiss and got shot down big time which was completely embarrassing. This woman was the typical boring DC area woman with a good job but not very feminine.
I can't say I would generalize women in the area from these two bad instances. Yes these women sucked (in my opinion) but I have also met some really nice women in the area as well. It seems the people complaining on here are negative people in general since the same people have nothing positive to say. Perhaps your standards are too high or you're just a negative person. Either way the problem is you. I learned a while ago to just dust yourself off and move on. Some people give off a great first fake impression when in reality they're immature ***holes (my first date this week) and some women just don't know how to be a lady and let the man be the man and be courted (my second date). However, there are others who do. I don't think everybody in DC is power and money hungry. You're obviously pursuing the wrong types of people if these are the kind of people you're encountering.
Ef the world. If most of the people in dc are snobs, too bad for them. They can't be saved. No use moping about it for the rest of your life, no matter how old you get. There is always a man somewhere willing to help a lady out; trust me.
I've seen this myself in DC so you're correct, my statement was meant to be general, but it was also meant to be more 'rule' than 'exception'. I can easily point out the overwhelming cases of old men with much younger women, unattractive fat men with beautiful model looking women, etc. In other words, if you're a female in your 20s and want to take one statement to heart, then I would understand that - while there are opportunities as you grow older - dating in your 30s will be much more complex/difficult (even obtaining a date) than dating in your 20s.
I've been to a great many happy hours where 'dumpy' women get hit on constantly by guys. BUT, and this is the big one, were I female, I wouldn't want to get breathed on by one of those guys, much less taken out on a date. There's a general rule in business - important people want to speak only to other important people. Substitute 'important' for 'physically attractive' and you can see why asymmetries develop in favor of men as both sexes get older.
I had zero problems getting dates after my divorce, when I was 38. If anything, being in my late 30s and divorced with no kids was like catnip for men. Had to beat them back with a stick.
It will be interesting to see how it plays out later this year when I start dating again at 48. Judging from the number of messages I got when I changed an OLD profile from NY to DC for a few days last year just to see what would happen, I'm not anticipating too much trouble. Heck, a few of them were all "it's a quick flight." I'm not particularly good-looking, so take this for what it's worth. Not a dog, either, but not being stunning probably works in my favor. "Approachable" is the word.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Muffy1
The men in DC are also looking for someone wealthy with power and an elite education but who is thin and usually plain jane. It is status for guys in DC. A guy can be awful and still find many women young and old.
No, the good ones aren't. I'm a writer (not wealthy) and I went to GW (decent school, but not elite). Not sure what you mean by "awful," but most of the men I've dated were good-looking to smokin' hot, and all were in shape. Ran into a few egos, but just avoid the attorneys and the ones with their noses in some politician's backside and you should be okay.
I'm not particularly good-looking, so take this for what it's worth. Not a dog, either, but not being stunning probably works in my favor. "Approachable" is the word.
You also seem to be humble, down to earth and yes, approachable. I think these things do help greatly - even for women in their 20s. Looks and age are very important, but I've ended dates with very attractive women because of bitchiness.
RLCMA, the 2 women that you mentioned make over a 100k. You also mentioned that the nurse went to Columbia. Maybe the nurse did not respond because she is actually busy or maybe she thought she needed to back off. You also mentioned the other woman made over 150k. Honestly I would not have kissed you on the first date either unless you have known each other for a while. There are alot of immature guys out there regardless of age. There are some men who want you to be intimate with them on the first, second, or third date and think the woman is a b$#ch if she does not but then turn around and act like you are a **** if you do so sometimes from my perspective it is safer to be reserved.
My point is would you have even gone out on a date with either of these women if they did not have jobs making over 100k, a title, and great education? I understand that people need someone on the same intellectual level as well as having common core values but lets just be honest with ourselves. Men, especially DC men, are looking for someone with money and status that is also young and very attractive and thin. DC men don't have to bring much to the table.
Last edited by Muffy1; 03-13-2015 at 11:49 AM..
Reason: I need to add something
RLCMA, the 2 women that you mentioned make over a 100k. You also mentioned that the nurse went to Columbia. Maybe the nurse did not respond because she is actually busy or maybe she thought she needed to back off. You also mentioned the other woman made over 150k. Honestly I would not have kissed you on the first date either unless you have known each other for a while. There are alot of immature guys out there regardless of age. There are some men who want you to be intimate with them on the first, second, or third date and think the woman is a b$#ch if she does not but then turn around and act like you are a **** if you do so sometimes from my perspective it is safer to be reserved.
My point is would you have even gone out on a date with either of these women if they did not have jobs making over 100k, a title, and great education?
Yes I would have. I don't care about income and education really. I met them both on Match and they initiated contact with me. I can't say I care about education and income all that much. However, I will say that as a guy with a Master's who makes over 150k I prefer someone with at least an Associates Degree and who has a decent job (under 100k is fine). I thought since both were in the same income range we may have more in common since we're at least at the same level financially.
Yes I would have. I don't care about income and education really. I met them both on Match and they initiated contact with me. I can't say I care about education and income all that much. However, I will say that as a guy with a Master's who makes over 150k I prefer someone with at least an Associates Degree and who has a decent job (under 100k is fine). I thought since both were in the same income range we may have more in common since we're at least at the same level financially.
I've dated plenty of women who make over $150k in DC. My experience tells me that women who make more than their peers are also far more apprehensive when dating. I had a chat about this with a very good female friend who is also a corp attorney in DC - she makes over $250k a year and is single (so are a lot of her female lawyer colleagues). She admitted that a lot of high salary females feel the need to 'protect' what they have - their money being the main thing, but also their stature, position, etc. I asked if this is because it may be more difficult for women to attain a higher salaried position than men of equal education and she said yes, but also because the norm for men is to be the breadwinner and share what they have with the family - this is something that men are expected to do, I don't think women on the whole have much 'sharing of their income' experience.
So it seems to be a double edged sword for women who make high salaries - and more than men. Taking this into consideration, I think the complex layer of online dating gives more pause to a woman in this situation, I certainly can't see how it helps at least.
Personally, I've ended online dating. I now 'scour' the metros - making small talk with females either in the train or waiting for the train. Hell, many a times, I've passed my train stop just to keep the convo flowing - statistically, this has had a much better affect than online dating. Of course, if you don't have the balls to do this - well, it's not for you then.
DC is a melting pot. I've dated the whole spectrum. Just this week I went out with a CRNA (Certified Registered Nurse Anesthetist) who generally make around 200k in the area and she went to Columbia. On paper she sounds great and during the date she complimented me, couldn't keep her hands off of me, and said she wanted to go on another date with me. She even brought up sexual things she wanted to do with me. Second date set for tonight and she said yesterday the hospital was shortstaffed so she was on call. She said after Saturday afternoon she was free so I mention Saturday night and she says she would be too tired after the half marathon. I shot a text back offering Sunday and get no response. This doesn't make any sense from the kind of date we had the other night other than the fact she is a tease and likes attention.
Another woman I dated making over 150k (I say this because they are both in the same income bracket as me) and upon meeting her she reached out her hand for a handshake instead of a hug (which I gave her anyway). After a while I went in for a kiss and got shot down big time which was completely embarrassing. This woman was the typical boring DC area woman with a good job but not very feminine.
I can't say I would generalize women in the area from these two bad instances. Yes these women sucked (in my opinion) but I have also met some really nice women in the area as well. It seems the people complaining on here are negative people in general since the same people have nothing positive to say. Perhaps your standards are too high or you're just a negative person. Either way the problem is you. I learned a while ago to just dust yourself off and move on. Some people give off a great first fake impression when in reality they're immature ***holes (my first date this week) and some women just don't know how to be a lady and let the man be the man and be courted (my second date). However, there are others who do. I don't think everybody in DC is power and money hungry. You're obviously pursuing the wrong types of people if these are the kind of people you're encountering.
And this is why relationships and marriages don't last long! Are you seriously expecting to meet a 30 plus year old woman who makes over 150k a year, is beautiful, sex crazed, and will also be a housewife, cook, and mom? Umm maybe the sexy $10 an hour nanny will be the mom, and you will have a cook, but then again if she's making that much she is obviously more dedicated to her career and is more man like and independent that she needs nobody! Why are you saying people on here have their standards too high when you are looking for women who "are in the same income bracket as me" ? Kind of classifies you as money hungry and a gold digger and obviously not seeking real love.
I see a lot of numbers and titles being thrown around on here. When I was dating, I avoided asking about work, or anything related to it. I wanted to get to know the person, hobbies, interests, how they could carry on a conversation. Where she worked and how much she made didn't really matter a whole lot to me on a first date.
I will admit, people are chomping on the bit to ask you the ever so popular "what do you do".
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