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The OP is what is known as s**t stirrer. What do you gain by going over and telling a coworker someone called them a fat cow other than to start trouble?
I am not a **** stirrer and I didn't go up to the person as we don't work in the same office. The reason I told this person is because I THOUGHT she was my friend. If someone was saying nasty things about your friend, I'd hope you'd tell them, since they are YOUR FRIEND.....I guess friendship doesn't mean the same to you as it does to me....I felt bad and didn't feel like the person talking **** about her behind her back had the best of intentions for what I considered a FRIEND.
You sound like the contractor with weed and alcohol problems I had to let go a month ago. Or Charlie Sheen. Winning!
PS. And by let go, I mean get rid of.
Nope, sorry, no weed or alcohol problems. I don't do drugs and haven't had a drink in over 5 years. You sound like a judgmental ***** - yep, figured that out the minute you posted your first response.
The position I was in was the same level position as the other employees. I was asked to monitor a call for the supervisor because they were too lazy to do their own job. I know it was wrong of me and I flippin admitted it. It was stupid to stay on and immature of me to do. I'm not denying that. I am; however, a responsible person and you all say fire me or what not, but you all have done things you shouldn't have done - at least I can admit it. Step 1 - admit the problem. . . I guess those of you who are putting me down have NEVER IN YOUR LIVES DONE ANYTHING YOU REGRETTED LATER - right, and pigs fly....
Instead of judging me, which is NOT WHY I POSTED here, I'm looking for advice. Again, I've admitted it was a mistake and moved past it. I was not in a position at that time that was at a level other than these people. Yes, I should have reported it to the supervisor and looking back, I know that's what I should have done. I reacted on emotion, not on logic, responsibility, and business ethics.
To those of you being *******s in your responses, just think your judgment day will come and when you are at the gates of heaven waiting to get in, remember you put others down for their mistakes as if you have never made any of your own mistakes....I'll be redeemed and forgiven as I admit my sins...you will be at the gates of hell and I'll be waiving with my cabana boy serving me drinks....
Anyone responsible enough to be an adult, act professional, and provide professional advice, I'm looking for your opinion. And again, those of you who have done NO WRONG ever and never, ever, ever regretted anything you did ... keep your nose out of it.
I'm sorry for what I did, I was sorry for it the same day it happened...that's not an issue. I'm a very conscientious person, ethical, and responsible, but as I said, I made a judgment mistake, bad call on my part, and I'm trying to right the wrong. If those people involved don't forgive me, they don't. I will try and it won't be for lack of trying because that's the kind of person I am.
When you put all your business on an Internet forum be prepared to get feedback that may not be what you want to hear.
It doesn't really matter if you "have gotten past it", the company and the higher ups have not.
And don't bring God into it and playing the "perfect card" with people.
You did something really stupid.
You stirred the pot and now it blew up in your face.
You were given advice. Start looking for another job.
You broke a work rule and you might be discharged over this. It will be fair to fire you because you were foolish or immature by repeating what you had heard. This demonstrates poor judgement and if you were in my chain of command I would demote you. Four months ago is not that long ago. As your supervisor, I would want you in a lower level position for a longer period of time before I felt you were seasoned enough to move up to a more responsible position. The best thing you can do at this point is to keep your nose clean and do your job exactly as you should. Don't allow yourself to get involved in any office drama or gossip.
Squirl - Thank you for being one person to provide some solid feedback that is not being aggressively judgmental. I agree that it was foolish and immature and it was something that a middle school student would do. I know that what I did was wrong and I want to right it - if the person hates me forever, then so be it; however, I don't want to live not saying I didn't try because I am a respectful person. I thought that I was helping someone I considered a "friend", in the end I hurt myself and others, which I'm not proud of.
This happened not while I was in a higher position - it happened prior to becoming a leader and while I was an agent in the same role as these other employees - I just helped out when needed. Also, you are correct, four months ago isn't that long ago - but it is when this issue dropped off the face of the earth until I got the job someone else wanted. I'm not saying that's entirely the cause as I am to blame for it; however, I know that jealousy is part of it.
When you put all your business on an Internet forum be prepared to get feedback that may not be what you want to hear.
It doesn't really matter if you "have gotten past it", the company and the higher ups have not.
And don't bring God into it and playing the "perfect card" with people.
You did something really stupid.
You stirred the pot and now it blew up in your face.
You were given advice. Start looking for another job.
I'm not playing the "perfect" card - it's just those on here like you that think they are Holier Than Thou....whatever.
As for posting it on the internet forum - it's for advice not to be criticized and treated like a piece of **** - obviously you have no morals if you treat others the way you all appear to on this "forum".
As for the higher ups not getting over it - the situation just came up - so even though it happened 4 months ago - it's just an "issue" now...not like it's been going on for four months. I have not done anything like this since then nor have I done anything similar. I realized the day it happened it was a mistake and that I was wrong.
Yep, I did something stupid. I was the first one to say that. I'm not posting on here to be told it was stupid as I already know that. No need to restate the obvious.
I am not a **** stirrer and I didn't go up to the person as we don't work in the same office. The reason I told this person is because I THOUGHT she was my friend. If someone was saying nasty things about your friend, I'd hope you'd tell them, since they are YOUR FRIEND.....I guess friendship doesn't mean the same to you as it does to me....I felt bad and didn't feel like the person talking **** about her behind her back had the best of intentions for what I considered a FRIEND.
First of all, this person wasn't stealing money from your "friend", she called her an unkind name. Sometimes it is better to not hurt someone's feelings and just let comments like that go. You don't pass them along to the person who was called the name.
I would have let this go, especially since you weren't supposed to hear it in the first place.
You sound very young.
There is a difference between real friends and so called "friends" at work.
IMO, I have always found it a lot easier to not mix friendships with work. Every once in awhile there might be someone you really hit it off with and is trustworthy and you develop a real friendship outside of work.
But I have found in most cases to keep work and personal life separate.
First of all, this person wasn't stealing money from your "friend", she called her an unkind name. Sometimes it is better to not hurt someone's feelings and just let comments like that go. You don't pass them along to the person who was called the name.
I would have let this go, especially since you weren't supposed to hear it in the first place.
You sound very young.
There is a difference between real friends and so called "friends" at work.
IMO, I have always found it a lot easier to not mix friendships with work. Every once in awhile there might be someone you really hit it off with and is trustworthy and you develop a real friendship outside of work.
But I have found in most cases to keep work and personal life separate.
You can save yourself some grief.
Thank You and yes, I am young...I try to do my best and try to do what is right and thought it was right...it was wrong.
I don't have many friends and value those that I do have...I thought this person was a friend and I cared about her. I wanted to help her, not hurt her and that's not what my intention was. I've learned a valuable lesson through this situation - I just need help on "fixing" it...help to gain the trust back or help to just make it better.
I don't have money and what I do have is gone when I get paid because I'm married, my husband lost his job due to downsizing, and the economy in my town is horrendous. I'm one paycheck away from eviction. That's not why I care about the issue or the job - whatever happens happens...I just want to learn from my mistakes and get advice from people who have experienced something similar and can help me fix this and move on in my career and work relationships.
Lesson learned - keep business business and personal personal...I won't mix them and even if I feel I have a work "friend" ... will only discuss "work" nothing more.
Here's my question...
What can I do to rebuild my reputation and regain trust of my co-workers?
What can I tell my manager about how I will work to regain the trust of my co-workers and rebuild my reputation?
Nothing you can do to regain trust of your co-workers. Friends and family yes but co-workers no way, once you cross that line you can never return.
Same with your manager, once trust is broken it's gone forever. Sounds like you learned your lesson but the damage is already done as far as your co-workers and manager are concerned.
I find that honesty is the best policy. Just lay it all out for your manager. Tell them what you said here and hope that they understand.
Good managers know that employees make mistakes but good employees learn from them and grow into better employees.
The position I was in was the same level position as the other employees. I was asked to monitor a call for the supervisor because they were too lazy to do their own job. I know it was wrong of me and I flippin admitted it. It was stupid to stay on and immature of me to do. I'm not denying that. I am; however, a responsible person and you all say fire me or what not, but you all have done things you shouldn't have done - at least I can admit it. Step 1 - admit the problem. . . I guess those of you who are putting me down have NEVER IN YOUR LIVES DONE ANYTHING YOU REGRETTED LATER - right, and pigs fly....
Instead of judging me, which is NOT WHY I POSTED here, I'm looking for advice. Again, I've admitted it was a mistake and moved past it. I was not in a position at that time that was at a level other than these people. Yes, I should have reported it to the supervisor and looking back, I know that's what I should have done. I reacted on emotion, not on logic, responsibility, and business ethics.
To those of you being *******s in your responses, just think your judgment day will come and when you are at the gates of heaven waiting to get in, remember you put others down for their mistakes as if you have never made any of your own mistakes....I'll be redeemed and forgiven as I admit my sins...you will be at the gates of hell and I'll be waiving with my cabana boy serving me drinks....
Anyone responsible enough to be an adult, act professional, and provide professional advice, I'm looking for your opinion. And again, those of you who have done NO WRONG ever and never, ever, ever regretted anything you did ... keep your nose out of it.
I'm sorry for what I did, I was sorry for it the same day it happened...that's not an issue. I'm a very conscientious person, ethical, and responsible, but as I said, I made a judgment mistake, bad call on my part, and I'm trying to right the wrong. If those people involved don't forgive me, they don't. I will try and it won't be for lack of trying because that's the kind of person I am.
It's hard for me to believe you actually think you did something wrong when you're still blaming other people (like supervisors being to lazy to do their job).
Like I said I have years of call center experience and you would have been fired if it had happened at any of the places I worked at.
And yes, you are a sh*t stirrer, there was absolutely NO valid reason for you to tell the employee that others were talking about her other than to start crap. Whether you want to admit that or not is moot, that's the ONLY reason someone would do something like that.
If you were truly sorry and ethical you would have told your own supervisors what happened right after it happened. You didn't, and now you have no one else to blame but yourself for the crappy situation you're in. I would NEVER trust you if I worked with you no matter what you tried to do to make amends.
You sound like the contractor with weed and alcohol problems I had to let go a month ago. Or Charlie Sheen. Winning!
PS. And by let go, I mean get rid of.
Say crankcase, nice going there stereotyping all contractors as weed head alcoholics. Believe me you need more smarts then you have to run a construction company and most of us are not users.
busta
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