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How much money would you actually end up with after moving to the new city, getting a car, and then moving back home 4 weeks later? Plus your living expenses for the month... it just doesn't sound like you'll come out ahead.
Not to mention the fact that you will not be able to put Company B on your resume.
That would be bad and in fact happened with my previous employer. I thought it was a ground based position without travel (the company offered to fly me in for a day of job shadowing but I declined, indicating I prefer to drive) however once I started, I got a surprise and they said guess what? We're sending you on a business trip to another town...I said great, will I use my car or a be provided a rental and they said nope, we're flying you and you'll get to go to multiple destinations. was my reaction so I spoke with the manager about my concerns and he asked, so are you afraid of flying? I told him I don't know but I haven't done it in years and have avoided it, so maybe. He seemed upset at first but then cancelled the business trip.
Now I must admit it would be better for city B's potential employer to know about my issue in advance so that a decision can be made to either make alternate arrangements (send someone else, drive instead of flying or maybe even hire someone else). But then I'd lose out on an almost guaranteed 4 weeks of training and pay.
About treatment for anxiety: no and my dad makes fun of it. My mom is a more caring person and understands. She offered me some pills but so far I've refused as I read you should never share medication...if you need help/treatment, seek out a professional. But it's expensive to hire a psychologist for private sessions (one clinical psych. quoted $210/hr and is located near city B while others cost at least $140-160/hr. Very expensive when you're unemployed and so if I can avoid a job with a flying requirement and save money, I'd prefer it. I do recognize however that limiting myself to ground transport has limited my career options when it comes to long distance relocation.
No, you won't. You'd at best get 2 weeks total. Remember the part about giving 2 weeks notice?
^
Anyway back on topic, I know everyone is telling me to call them to decline but is there a way to write something that would let me stall a bit more (hoping to hear back from another company)? As demonstrated yesterday, when under the gun with a looming deadline, I don't always make the most rational decision.
No.
Stop stalling.
Be a grownup and call today to cancel, right now, before the the end of business day.
You aren't employed by them yet and you are not going to be employed there because you cannot and will not do some duties the job requires.
You COULD get a job in your hometown this weekend, if you only would. But you'd prefer to do this "busywork," pretending you are in a legitimate job search, stalling and wasting people's time and money.
^^ To be fair, the travel component was buried in the job description and apparently it's either a one time thing or very occasional. The way it was worded was ambiguous but ok it's my fault for not spotting it earlier. Still, it's better that the issue comes to light now before I start rather than later with them announcing hey sedona, we're sending you to Chile to meet an important client ...and I'd be like ,"what? I thought this job was based in (city B)?...nope sorry, I can't do it, I'm a nervous flyer." Then there would be a fall out and the manager might fire me on the spot.
Anyway back on topic, I know everyone is telling me to call them to decline but is there a way to write something that would let me stall a bit more (hoping to hear back from another company)? As demonstrated yesterday, when under the gun with a looming deadline, I don't always make the most rational decision.
Why are you stalling, you don't qualify for the job in city B? City C is going to have the same problems regarding the crazy shifts, and problems keeping those hours with a roommate. Then there is the storage unit, the lack of transportation, the certification exam... You can't keep calling every job you lose an internship, or a just a temp job. Find a job that you can do successfully, one that doesn't require these long training sessions that never seem to work out in your favor. Keep your job search radius no more than 20 miles outside of city A.
Not to be harsh, but this is ridiculous. Call them, thank them for their time and decline. You won't be the first OR last person to do it. Sometimes in life we have to suck it up and do things that make us uncomfortable.
I am sympathetic to an extent, as I feel there are some major underlying anxiety issues or something... But what you are doing is not the right thing. What's 4 weeks of training/pay in the grand scheme of things? And that's if you don't give a 2 week notice. If you give one, they probably won't allow you to work it out as you wasted their time. This depends on where you are, but it's possible. So all of this for only 2 possible weeks of training and pay?
Having read this thread and your previous thread about your last job, my recommendation would be to turn down this job.
Then, before you do anything else, schedule a few sessions with a career counselor. You sound like you would benefit from talking with someone who can help you figure out what you really want to do, and help you put together a plan for getting there.
Since you're a new graduate, you may have some career counseling services available to you through your college. But, it might be better to pay for a few sessions with a professional who can really help you sort things out over several sessions.
The stalling is really a form of procrastination - putting off the contact so I don't have to deal with it now and hoping I'll know what's right for me tomorrow or the next day. That's pretty much why I let the manager's call go to voice mail and took me 2 days to reach him after the verbal offer was left by voice mail and then another week to reply to the written offer.
I just checked my email and there's no follow up from him since the early AM. I guess he's been waiting all day for my reply? I have a feeling that if I suddenly pull the plug he'll react really badly since it's been like 10 days since the initial offer with first me accepting and now the next day because there's international travel involved, it's a no? He could counter and say let's just see how it goes and we could send you on the trip later.
Another option is to just ignore his email, pretend I didn't see it, log back in Monday and say oops! sorry I missed your email, oh here's the document you requested...and by the way let's nix that international travel. I could also tell a white lie and say my passport just expired, sorry I didn't notice it ...it will take x # of months to apply for a renewal..can you wait that long (and in the meantime do therapy and get my rump in an aircraft to get over the flying anxiety step by step..)
The stalling is really a form of procrastination - putting off the contact so I don't have to deal with it now and hoping I'll know what's right for me tomorrow or the next day. That's pretty much why I let the manager's call go to voice mail and took me 2 days to reach him after the verbal offer was left by voice mail and then another week to reply to the written offer.
I just checked my email and there's no follow up from him since the early AM. I guess he's been waiting all day for my reply? I have a feeling that if I suddenly pull the plug he'll react really badly since it's been like 10 days since the initial offer with first me accepting and now the next day because there's international travel involved, it's a no? He could counter and say let's just see how it goes and we could send you on the trip later.
Another option is to just ignore his email, pretend I didn't see it, log back in Monday and say oops! sorry I missed your email, oh here's the document you requested...and by the way let's nix that international travel.
Whatever is right for you today, will not change tomorrow, or the next day.
I just checked my email and there's no follow up from him since the early AM. I guess he's been waiting all day for my reply? I have a feeling that if I suddenly pull the plug he'll react really badly since it's been like 10 days since the initial offer with first me accepting and now the next day because there's international travel involved, it's a no? He could counter and say let's just see how it goes and we could send you on the trip later.
Another option is to just ignore his email, pretend I didn't see it, log back in Monday and say oops! sorry I missed your email, oh here's the document you requested...and by the way let's nix that international travel. I could also tell a white lie and say my passport just expired, sorry I didn't notice it ...it will take x # of months to apply for a renewal..can you wait that long (and in the meantime do therapy and get my rump in an aircraft to get over the flying anxiety step by step..)
I could be wrong, but I doubt the manager is sitting there waiting for your reply. Chances are the manager has decided that you aren't really interested in the job and has moved on to the next candidate. Just like you are free to change your mind, so are they.
The stalling is really a form of procrastination - putting off the contact so I don't have to deal with it now and hoping I'll know what's right for me tomorrow or the next day. That's pretty much why I let the manager's call go to voice mail and took me 2 days to reach him after the verbal offer was left by voice mail and then another week to reply to the written offer.
I just checked my email and there's no follow up from him since the early AM. I guess he's been waiting all day for my reply? I have a feeling that if I suddenly pull the plug he'll react really badly since it's been like 10 days since the initial offer with first me accepting and now the next day because there's international travel involved, it's a no? He could counter and say let's just see how it goes and we could send you on the trip later.
Another option is to just ignore his email, pretend I didn't see it, log back in Monday and say oops! sorry I missed your email, oh here's the document you requested...and by the way let's nix that international travel. I could also tell a white lie and say my passport just expired, sorry I didn't notice it ...it will take x # of months to apply for a renewal..can you wait that long (and in the meantime do therapy and get my rump in an aircraft to get over the flying anxiety step by step..)
Stalling IS procrastination.
News flash: He's not there waiting to hear from you. You are a blip on the radar to this company. Do or do not, says Yoda.
He might counter with "let's just see how it goes"? This is the wishful thinking of a teenager.
A white lie is a LIE. Most everything you're proposing is a lie – either to them or yourself.
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was my reaction so I spoke with the manager about my concerns and he asked, so are you afraid of flying? I told him I don't know but I haven't done it in years and have avoided it, so maybe. He seemed upset at first but then cancelled the business trip. 
