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If you want to give money then do it, if not, don't. Don't worry about how others look upon you. Actually I think it's rude to ask for money if it's not anonymous. At my office there's a few times there's an optional contribution for a certain employee or group of employees but it's always anonymous (envelope passed around) and I almost always decline. Only time I give if it's someone I know and like. I don't feel any pressure to donate and you shouldn't either.
Wait until you get hit up for funeral expenses for someone who has a life insurance policy that pays out three times gross salary.
Were you close enough to a Japanese person in order to be an attendee at their funeral or the funeral of someone close and dear to them? If so, it is customary to offer Kouden, or condolence money.
My husband and I attended a traditional Japanese funeral and burial in California and we paid respect by offering Kouden. We certainly did not feel like we were being "hit up" for funeral expenses.
Just give or don't give. No One's forcing you to contribute.
Maybe not but being the one person who doesn't want to buy the, gs cookies, calendars, candles, nuts, bs popcorn, pizza, wrapping paper, list goes on... from the co worker with 10 grandkids... makes you look like the bad guy.
Shame on that person who tries to guilt you into buying stupid crap nobody wants or needs.
And yeah, the company's slush fund should pay for that kind of stuff OP.
Just an fyi, I would buy a box or two of GS cookies if I knew one lol.
Each Christmas our small group tossed in some bucks and got our boss a group gift. Nothing fancy, just a token of our good will during the holidays. Well his Girl FRIDAY , upped the ante and told us to dig deeper in our pockets. What once was a 100$- 200$ gift range from the entire gang turned into HER pestering the team for more "Christmas Blessings". 600$ total for Mounds of treats - Exercise equipment, to Boxes of Nutrition bars , to sports wear. It was seriously overkill on the gift presentation. Even our Boss was timidly embarrassed that the gifts just kept coming for him. He wanted to just crawl under a chair when his Girl Friday said..Ohh but theres more!!
We all learned our lesson that day and even my boss made it clear he didn't want that kind of display ever again. He said Point blank- A simple Mug or a small sporting gift card next year folks, okay??
I give on special circumstances and contingent on WHO it is. It really does come down to budget though and being able to say No when its outlandish displays.....
We always gave to our bosses on Bosses' Day (some toadie would organize, collect money, choose the gift, and present it). In my over thirty years of working, I got exactly three negligible gifts from a boss -- one Christmas, a candle; the other two, homemade holiday treats. Never a bonus. Didn't seem quite fair! But gifting should be just for friends and family and always from the heart; not obligatory.
Were you close enough to a Japanese person in order to be an attendee at their funeral or the funeral of someone close and dear to them? If so, it is customary to offer Kouden, or condolence money.
My husband and I attended a traditional Japanese funeral and burial in California and we paid respect by offering Kouden. We certainly did not feel like we were being "hit up" for funeral expenses.
Not Japanese. Here it's somewhat of a Southern thing.
If you genuinely cant afford it, thats one thing. Otherwise, dont be cheap. These are the people you see as much or more than you do your own family. At the very least, its good karma. It also may be good for your career - not that it should be but still, people will have your attitude, generosity or lack thereof in the back of their mind when your name comes up.
If you are worried about giving too much or not enough ask the collector or coworkers what the average gift is so far. "What are most people giving?"
Overall I don't think giving $10 is that big a deal. But sometimes it is irritating that we give gifts to people celebrating big life events while many others aren't going to have these events. Either they already happened or they just won't happen. Perhaps some people had them happen at an office that did nothing for them and here they are being asked to give a gift to someone else. Or someone like me who is married with 2 kids and not having anymore. I guess I have no gifts in my future. I realize this is petty but we all are faced with having to attend showers of all kinds, engagement parties, weddings, funerals, birthday parties in our everyday lives for people in our family or friends. Do we really need to do this for co workers too?
One office I worked in had a voluntary “Sunshine Fund” that covered funeral flowers to a specific group of relatives. Replenished as needed. If you didn’t participate, you wouldn’t get the flowers. I don’t think anyone really knew who all was in it except the “treasurer.”
Another workplace had a excellent (IMO) tradition for birthdays. YOU bought the treats if you wanted them for your birthday. And you could bring whatever you liked - doughnuts, bagels, veggie tray, or even nothing at all.
Each Christmas our small group tossed in some bucks and got our boss a group gift. Nothing fancy, just a token of our good will during the holidays. Well his Girl FRIDAY , upped the ante and told us to dig deeper in our pockets. What once was a 100$- 200$ gift range from the entire gang turned into HER pestering the team for more "Christmas Blessings". 600$ total for Mounds of treats - Exercise equipment, to Boxes of Nutrition bars , to sports wear. It was seriously overkill on the gift presentation. Even our Boss was timidly embarrassed that the gifts just kept coming for him. He wanted to just crawl under a chair when his Girl Friday said..Ohh but theres more!!
We all learned our lesson that day and even my boss made it clear he didn't want that kind of display ever again. He said Point blank- A simple Mug or a small sporting gift card next year folks, okay??
I give on special circumstances and contingent on WHO it is. It really does come down to budget though and being able to say No when its outlandish displays.....
Obviously there can be exceptions, but the general rule of thumb has always been, gifts can be given DOWN on the hierarchy, but not up.
Probably for the dual reason that the boss makes more money, and no one wants to risk being a brown-noser
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