Marrying Hookers, Strippers, etc. Wow: Whouda Thunk That Wouldn't End Well?
Reading a story elsewhere about another man getting fleeced by a wife. A bad wife, we might say, as in a person with a "colorful" past. There are two sides to every story, "but" it goes to something more fundamental, in my observation.
I have three guys I trust to watch my back. They're my brothers now, closest thing a loner like me has to family.
In an odd stroke of timing, 2/3 friends had a bad 2014. Each had partners of about 11 years walk out on them. One married, the other common-law. So I've heard an earful. There were children involved each time, which makes it much harder (mostly on the kids: I wouldn't wish this kind of disruption on young kids or teens; they can't handle complex emotions and tend to internalize).
Let's just say I've heard it all, seen it all. I've not experienced it personally: people are insane for "getting married" and "having kids", from my point of view. I never have, nor ever will, keep any woman around for longer than about a year. It cannot, and should not, be so for those with minimal emotional needs and empathy nor desire to breed.
...but hey: I'm the minority view, if something like 90% of men marry at some point in their lives. That stat, if-accurate, is declining over time btw as both men AND women smarten up. Never mind.
Now: getting down to it.
I've dated smoking-hot Russian nationals, good looking Americans, and presentable women from various countries since about age 17, like most normal hetero American men. I'm no George Clooney but write well, speak well, have a great career, own a nice and well-kept home, have various toys (vehicles) and present well to women when I choose too. I treat ladies well and courteously, and have a modest amount of respect for them as *worthy opponents*. That last is key.
Make no mistake about it: women are in an adversarial role to us, in the match game. We think we're communicating, but we really aren't. Both genders have an unfortunate tendency to talk past one another, allowing emotions (the "love" thing) get in the way of good sense. Both genders do this, let me reiterate! Love blinds us to the fundamental difference in GOALS of one gender vs. another.
I've had enough friends who were bike and car-heads to know what a man wants most, what he needs most, is time by himself or with buddies either building, fixing, riding, racing, designing, engineering, or tearing up (something). One of my pals builds Lego contraptions that would astound Einstein (that buddy is a genius and 98 percentile income to-boot). Another designs groundwater recovery systems, and models contaminant transport in soil; he too is close to genius though has health problems. The third is a master woodworker, and darn good home improver, with maybe a hundred grand in top-end tools. He's a damn good Adventure motorcycle rider, too, and best of all: a just and fair dad to his young adult kids.
And I am a computer nerd, at a software major here in Seattle. I work hard, play hard, and have my toys too. We're all Type-A, doers and thinkers who strive for excellence in what we deliver. We each fail sometimes, but also each know how to bounce back harder and stronger for the experience.
Point of the above is not to let women get in the way of what a man really wants and needs in life. Don't get into the situation to begin with. Again, I've seen it play out many times with motorcycle riding pals in-particular: women are experts at twisting a man's heart, which connects to his wallet, and pimping him out of what he worked hard for. One buddy's MV Agusta (exotic motorcycle) is in my garage right now and probably needs to be sold to support an upcoming divorce. Something he did not ask for, or want, by any stretch.
But that's what they do. My dad taught me well: "To a woman, it simply goes like this: "What's mine is mine, and what's yours is mine!" Understand that fundamental imperative, which is so different from yours my son, you'll stay out of a lot of trouble in life!" Amen to that, pops.
I do not "hate" or call nasty names any of my ex GFs, or the two buddy's wives/SO's mentioned above. That is to say: one cannot hate Martians; aliens/AI are what they are. They walk, talk, make sounds like humans, but really are not...at least by a man's definition. They simply do not think like we do, or have similar imperatives! Thus, I do not...EVER...give them leverage over resources that I am not willing to light on fire and write-off. There is no benefit, only cost. They have no vacations to sell me, so to speak.
Thus, in silent response to a thread found elsewhere that touched a nerve: "marrying" a hooker/stripper or person with "emotional problems" is simply stupid. Write off the error, move on, start again from scratch. Don't be a hater, just understand that you've been undone by lack of planning and understanding of the adversary.
I have three guys I trust to watch my back. They're my brothers now, closest thing a loner like me has to family.
In an odd stroke of timing, 2/3 friends had a bad 2014. Each had partners of about 11 years walk out on them. One married, the other common-law. So I've heard an earful. There were children involved each time, which makes it much harder (mostly on the kids: I wouldn't wish this kind of disruption on young kids or teens; they can't handle complex emotions and tend to internalize).
Let's just say I've heard it all, seen it all. I've not experienced it personally: people are insane for "getting married" and "having kids", from my point of view. I never have, nor ever will, keep any woman around for longer than about a year. It cannot, and should not, be so for those with minimal emotional needs and empathy nor desire to breed.
...but hey: I'm the minority view, if something like 90% of men marry at some point in their lives. That stat, if-accurate, is declining over time btw as both men AND women smarten up. Never mind.
Now: getting down to it.
I've dated smoking-hot Russian nationals, good looking Americans, and presentable women from various countries since about age 17, like most normal hetero American men. I'm no George Clooney but write well, speak well, have a great career, own a nice and well-kept home, have various toys (vehicles) and present well to women when I choose too. I treat ladies well and courteously, and have a modest amount of respect for them as *worthy opponents*. That last is key.
Make no mistake about it: women are in an adversarial role to us, in the match game. We think we're communicating, but we really aren't. Both genders have an unfortunate tendency to talk past one another, allowing emotions (the "love" thing) get in the way of good sense. Both genders do this, let me reiterate! Love blinds us to the fundamental difference in GOALS of one gender vs. another.
I've had enough friends who were bike and car-heads to know what a man wants most, what he needs most, is time by himself or with buddies either building, fixing, riding, racing, designing, engineering, or tearing up (something). One of my pals builds Lego contraptions that would astound Einstein (that buddy is a genius and 98 percentile income to-boot). Another designs groundwater recovery systems, and models contaminant transport in soil; he too is close to genius though has health problems. The third is a master woodworker, and darn good home improver, with maybe a hundred grand in top-end tools. He's a damn good Adventure motorcycle rider, too, and best of all: a just and fair dad to his young adult kids.
And I am a computer nerd, at a software major here in Seattle. I work hard, play hard, and have my toys too. We're all Type-A, doers and thinkers who strive for excellence in what we deliver. We each fail sometimes, but also each know how to bounce back harder and stronger for the experience.
Point of the above is not to let women get in the way of what a man really wants and needs in life. Don't get into the situation to begin with. Again, I've seen it play out many times with motorcycle riding pals in-particular: women are experts at twisting a man's heart, which connects to his wallet, and pimping him out of what he worked hard for. One buddy's MV Agusta (exotic motorcycle) is in my garage right now and probably needs to be sold to support an upcoming divorce. Something he did not ask for, or want, by any stretch.
But that's what they do. My dad taught me well: "To a woman, it simply goes like this: "What's mine is mine, and what's yours is mine!" Understand that fundamental imperative, which is so different from yours my son, you'll stay out of a lot of trouble in life!" Amen to that, pops.
I do not "hate" or call nasty names any of my ex GFs, or the two buddy's wives/SO's mentioned above. That is to say: one cannot hate Martians; aliens/AI are what they are. They walk, talk, make sounds like humans, but really are not...at least by a man's definition. They simply do not think like we do, or have similar imperatives! Thus, I do not...EVER...give them leverage over resources that I am not willing to light on fire and write-off. There is no benefit, only cost. They have no vacations to sell me, so to speak.
Thus, in silent response to a thread found elsewhere that touched a nerve: "marrying" a hooker/stripper or person with "emotional problems" is simply stupid. Write off the error, move on, start again from scratch. Don't be a hater, just understand that you've been undone by lack of planning and understanding of the adversary.
