Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
Ok first off please ignore cape fishermans ignorant post - not an assessment he can make just by reading your post. I would agree that there is a possibility that your husband is depressed - been there & it did not end well for me. There is a hotline run by Trident United Way - please call it. They can help with everything from agencies to offer financial assistance, financial counseling, information on depression or just lending an ear. They are at the phones 24 hours per day. Just call 211. I made this post public so everyone on here knows about this hotline but if you want to private message me anytime please do. Be strong times get hard - a lot of people go through hard times and come out happier & healthier!
So many people are struggling in these tough times. And I am sure you feel alone, you truly aren't.
I don't think that there is any one answer to help, but what I can share with you is that here in our home we have been in tough situations. Men deal with these things differently than women and more often than not they don't know how to handle them at all.
That does NOT mean, that your hubby is a loser, doesn't love you or is a mooch.
If he is truly struggling, stand beside him. Work through this with him, I know you are trying to do this and yes I know, the days can get long and tough but each day will be anew filled with new hope.
It is hard for anyone, especially a male to be unemployed or underemployed. It is a psyche' thing.
Does that mean he shouldn't do whatever he needs to do to help ends meet? No, that isn't what I am saying. What I am saying is that, he will have to do that, you will just have to find that special way to encourage him. Trust me, it can be done!
Do NOT buy into the line that their are jobs on Craigslist, etc.........for anyone who is legitimately job hunting, they know that more than half the ads on CL are bogus or staffing firms gathering resumes.
For those who don't believe me or understand, venture into the work and employment forum, you find the same information. With that said, when job hunting these days, you have to be especially careful that someone isn't phishing for your information. Many have been burned that way. Sad but true.
Lastly, I don't know of your and your hubby's beliefs. But, here in our home we both have a strong faith in GOD. That has pulled us through. Many prayers have been lifted in our home and tears shed over struggles but GOD always pulls us through. And we will pray for you guys too!
You only have one problem. Your husband is lazy and does not love his family.
Depression has nothing to do with it.
Tell him to get off his rear, get out there, and help YOU with this situation.
You will never get to the place you want to be alone...at least not with that extra mouth to feed.
Sorry for the very blunt post, but there are jobs for your husband to have. Do not be fooled into thinking there is not. Craigslist is loaded with them.
Also, don't cancel your internet......that is a means to job hunt.
If you are cutting expenses then cut the cable off, you would
be surprised how that alone can and will change your outlook !!!!!
It's a very American post- uninformed and full of false boosterism.
It was the mindset of many during the 30's Depression- which is why the suicide rate for males went off the chart.
Oh, and as far as killing the cable but keeping the internet to save money. Sounds good in theory, but I've known several people who tried this for the projected cost savings only to findout that the service provider jacked up the price for internet to "Reflect the decreasing use of products."
But that was for those who had 'bundled' (great advertizing term) cable and internet; not sure if that would hold true for Direct TV- type operations.
Whatever you do, just don't get pregnant. We had our first child before we were financially stable and it was really, really rough.
I'm with the posters who said your husband needs a bit of a kick -- the job may stink but it's better than nothing. And, make sure you praise him for whatever he brings home. It sounds like you got a lot of good suggestions. I wish you good luck.
Kudos to everyone on here lending her an ear and giving positive feedback. Good to see from complete strangers. Hope this at least makes you feel a little better...
It's a very American post- uninformed and full of false boosterism.
It was the mindset of many during the 30's Depression- which is why the suicide rate for males went off the chart.
Oh, and as far as killing the cable but keeping the internet to save money. Sounds good in theory, but I've known several people who tried this for the projected cost savings only to findout that the service provider jacked up the price for internet to "Reflect the decreasing use of products."
But that was for those who had 'bundled' (great advertizing term) cable and internet; not sure if that would hold true for Direct TV- type operations.
In times like this, there is nothing positive in pounding others.
You never know what someone is going through, and the flip side is
if this was you, wouldn't you want some kindness.
For us, a few years ago to cut costs we cut the cable. Well it was direct tv....and it was the best choice we made. Our internet was through the phone company, and you can have stand alone DSL via AT&T/Bellsouth with no problems. It's just a thought to cut expenses.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
