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Some of the rudest, least pleasant interactions I've ever had with complete strangers have been in Connecticut (Fairfield, Trumbull and Old Saybrook, IIRC). Thankfully, I didn't grow up there, so I only had to deal with that attitude/mindset on occasion.
Strangely enough, I grew up mostly in Trumbull, living there from second grade until high school graduation.
I'll admit I'm also a pretty introverted person. I personally like the rare occasions that someone strikes up a genuine conversation with me. But I seldom to never initiate them, because I'm worried the other person would be rude to me in response. Must be those years of Connecticut conditioning.
I can't really stand people who refuse to talk. They just seem suspicious to me. I never knew northerners thought the opposite. I really don't see how talking would be rude. Why be ignored?
I fail to understand your reasoning. Just because someone does not want to talk to you, a complete stranger, how does that affect you? Is is supecious; turn that around. Why would you, a complete stranger, want to talk to me, a complete stranger. I find it very suspicious. Is it rude to try and start a conversation? I don't think so; however it is not rude to ignore a person who wants to start a conversation.
I don't have anything to add; I just do not want to talk to a stranger, and I don't trust any stranger who wants to start conversation since in my opinion, they are being too nosy.
I have noticed that one of the cultural things which varies pretty dramatically in the U.S. from region to region is whether or not people make causal conversation with strangers.
Growing up mostly in New England (as I was), you are impressed upon the idea that it's intrusive and rude to speak to someone who is minding their own business unless you have some pressing reason to do so. There are appropriate times to speak to someone (such as when being introduced by a mutual friend, or if you have to conduct business with them) but just going up to a random person and starting conversation simply isn't done. If a stranger does talk to you, it's generally safe to presume they are asking you for money, proselytizing, or just crazy.
As I got older and traveled around the country more, the more gregarious nature of people elsewhere (particularly in the Midwest and South) really took getting used to. I realized I had a natural "guard" up when people talked to me, because I presumed that any stranger who was shooting the **** had some ulterior motive (such as looking for money, or to save my soul, as mentioned above). The idea that a stranger would just make conversation for the hell of it was mind-blowing. People from other parts of the country have similarly been shocked when I've told them it's generally considered to be rude to speak to someone you don't know in New England.
Anyway, I'd be interested to hear the impressions from other people across the country on this.
I'm in Mississippi. We talk to each other all the time.
It was pretty much the same in Texas, Georgia, and Alabama, but not so true in Seattle or Chicago.
But I was on Long Island when a stranger invited himself to share my lunch table and engaged in lengthy conversation. Casual setting, of course.
We had a visitor for Ukraine. She was a high profile new reporter in Ukraine and stayed with us for about a week as part of an exchange program. She said she was going to go back to Ukraine and walk down the street speaking to people, saying "Hi! How are you? Nice day!" She said someone would probably have her detained for being insane!
I don't like it, I don't need strangers talkin to me "just to talk", that's a women thing, gossiping about stupid stuff, I can't stand it, please mind your own business and don't breake my balls unless it's a VERY IMPORTANT THING , the city where I live now is unfortunately full of these people, the city where I lived before not.
It very depend to the city.
Here in the Cleveland area I find people are very friendly but never intrusive. Conversations with strangers are usually where people are thrown into a frustrating situation like standing in a long line or waiting for a bus that's late. This just happened to me last week. A very nice middle-aged man commented to me about how long he had been waiting for the bus and the conversation began.
I usually wait for someone to talk to me mostly because I recently moved from an unfriendly city where people are not inclined to do so. I don't want to break into anyone else's space.
I find that men and women are on the whole equally interested in sharing a conversation but I actually think I've had more men talk to me than women. The topics are usually about the city, the situation we're sharing or comments on the news of the day.
I always speak to the cashier, waiter, etc and asked how's it going. Yesterday as I was leaving a store, I noticed this older fellow's ball cap. It said "Hank Williams Museum, Montgomery, Alabama." I hollered at him, Hey, how was the Hank Williams Museum? We had a pleasant chat about Hank Williams and he recommended I visit the museum. I will be going next week.
I guess if I had done this up north, I would have pissed off a bunch of people. As it was, he left happy and I left happy. Life's too short to go around in a bad mood.
I always speak to the cashier, waiter, etc and asked how's it going. Yesterday as I was leaving a store, I noticed this older fellow's ball cap. It said "Hank Williams Museum, Montgomery, Alabama." I hollered at him, Hey, how was the Hank Williams Museum? We had a pleasant chat about Hank Williams and he recommended I visit the museum. I will be going next week. I guess if I had done this up north, I would have pissed off a bunch of people. As it was, he left happy and I left happy. Life's too short to go around in a bad mood.
That would depend upon where you were "up north."
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, the city where I live now is unfortunately full of these people, the city where I lived before not.
