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I was paying out 1800 a month. Over 50% of my income. Plus medical coverage. The ex makes 28 an hour working for the post office. Even with that she was always calling wanting 200 here 400 there blah blah. Which I actually tried to do, until she bought a new car, a swimming pool, took 2 week vacations back to WV to see her dad, bought season passes to Six Flags, on and on it went. All the meantime I'm barely making rent and utilities, let alone my medical expenses.
Then the injury put me permanently out of work. The CS agency didn't care about any of that, when I got just a month behind, the first month I was out of work, they pulled my DL.and started charging interest at credit card rates. When I hear about these guys that are only paying a pittance each month and are 6months or better behind and still have their DL, are working and just skating along, it flat frosts me! Sheesh, I sold everything of value I walked away from the divorce with to try and stay level, and that wasn't near enough. When I finally got her back to court and got all this in front of the judge, it was to late. I'll never get caught up, and a real fresh start is out of the question.
I'd need a major windfall to have much of a life. A d yet, I was labeled a "deadbeat", until the judge said otherwise. I should have, and could have, made her pay back what she took from my disability benefit, that was over and above the back support. I would have never seen it though. She had spent every dime. Yep, nobody said life is fair, and courts and CS agencies take that to heart.
I might have missed a comment, if so I apologize, but I thought you said you were on SSDI, if so they pay (in addition to your benefits) 50% to your children, most states disallow the mother from trying to get more money from the father and declare that as the maximum child support that she can receive.
All for the children, right? My 2nd daughter is literally having food taken right off the table by the system.
You chose to bring another child into the picture after knowing you had an obligation to the first.
My ex gets pissed off at my situation as well. But just because my parents have money and provide extras like meals, trips and what not, does not mean that it is my parents responsibility to pick up his obligation of support. Our son is his first obligation and the support is based off his income, my income, the child's expenses (daycare) and the time spent with each parent. I happen to have the child most of the time.
You chose to bring another child into the picture after knowing you had an obligation to the first.
My ex gets pissed off at my situation as well. But just because my parents have money and provide extras like meals, trips and what not, does not mean that it is my parents responsibility to pick up his obligation of support. Our son is his first obligation and the support is based off his income, my income, the child's expenses (daycare) and the time spent with each parent. I happen to have the child most of the time.
Oh, come on. Why is it that I have an obligation to pay 50% of my income to my 1st daughter (almost 1k/mo), yet my ex has an obligation to provide ZERO (she got fired from her job and hasn't worked since)?
If we had 50/50 custody the amount of money I would be paying would be wayyyy less. Said another way: there is a huge profit paid to my ex for the child support.
And again, I should have been awarded custody in the first place.
All for the children, right? My 2nd daughter is literally having food taken right off the table by the system.
Its and average so yes it includes all support payments. So the average person collecting CS is not living high on the hog.
I wonder did you fight for custody? I'm not sure how you got such a bad deal. Generally its more like 17-20% of your income for one child with exceptions and adjustments for things like who is providing health care. Perhaps you should try to have your CS modified.
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Oh, come on. Why is it that I have an obligation to pay 50% of my income to my 1st daughter (almost 1k/mo), yet my ex has an obligation to provide ZERO (she got fired from her job and hasn't worked since)?
Thats my contention that both parents should be required to provide equal support. Honestly though if your ex is living that well, so is your child. The ex is providing a very nice home, food, vacations, etc. I imagine all that is at least 1K/month.
I always thought the concept of mandated child support was government overreach
And if parents would voluntarily and consistently help to financially support their children the government would not have to step in and make them. The government got involved because the taxpayers got tired of having to help provide when children were left in poverty due to abandonment by a parent.
You should probably move out of the USA. No other place in the world would this scenario be allowed to exist, especially not with the million dollar house. Oh sorry Canada is just as bad as well as the UK.
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Originally Posted by dysgenic
Oh, come on. Why is it that I have an obligation to pay 50% of my income to my 1st daughter (almost 1k/mo), yet my ex has an obligation to provide ZERO (she got fired from her job and hasn't worked since)?
If we had 50/50 custody the amount of money I would be paying would be wayyyy less. Said another way: there is a huge profit paid to my ex for the child support.
And again, I should have been awarded custody in the first place.
Oh, come on. Why is it that I have an obligation to pay 50% of my income to my 1st daughter (almost 1k/mo), yet my ex has an obligation to provide ZERO (she got fired from her job and hasn't worked since)?
If we had 50/50 custody the amount of money I would be paying would be wayyyy less. Said another way: there is a huge profit paid to my ex for the child support.
And again, I should have been awarded custody in the first place.
I am sure your ex has lots of expenses that directly benefit your child. My ex is ordered to pay around what your pay. I pay $600 for our child to go to part time daycare so I can work. So daycare takes almost all the child support. Plus I have preschool, insurance, medical expenses, clothing, shoes, shelter, utilities, transportation and food. The bulk of the driving I do is driving our child to my ex, to kid events and to and from daycare and school.
But you probably don't live in a million dollar home or take elaborate vacations.
Quote:
Originally Posted by LowonLuck
I am sure your ex has lots of expenses that directly benefit your child. My ex is ordered to pay around what your pay. I pay $600 for our child to go to part time daycare so I can work. So daycare takes almost all the child support. Plus I have preschool, insurance, medical expenses, clothing, shoes, shelter, utilities, transportation and food. The bulk of the driving I do is driving our child to my ex, to kid events and to and from daycare and school.
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