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Old 06-26-2017, 11:38 AM
 
13,679 posts, read 20,816,033 times
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Well now, let's not get carried away.

I have many female friends. They all have one thing in common- I was never attracted to them and possibly vice-versa. It's a different dynamic than my male friends, but women and men- despite what some say- are different.

Besides, the best way for the randy male to meet single women is through other women. Most women know lots of other women after all.

But as I said before, when the dynamic is as the OP describes, it's time to lay the cards on the table and cash out if necessary.
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Old 06-26-2017, 11:39 AM
 
2,513 posts, read 2,797,872 times
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Presentable sister? What?
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Old 06-26-2017, 01:35 PM
 
Location: Houston area
841 posts, read 1,125,216 times
Reputation: 1867
It's a shame that some men only befriend women they are attracted to. I think it is dishonest. "Hey I'm only friends with you because I think you're hot and I don't have the guts to ask you out or I think you are not that into me." Because I wonder if these guys would be close friends with an unattractive girl.
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Old 06-26-2017, 01:46 PM
 
14,375 posts, read 18,411,329 times
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I think you don't need to give a reason, OP. She knows how you feel. If she asks, maybe you give an explanation, but I think just politely distancing yourself is perfectly fine.
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Old 06-26-2017, 02:21 PM
 
22,278 posts, read 21,778,350 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Whyrallnamestaken View Post
It's a shame that some men only befriend women they are attracted to. I think it is dishonest. "Hey I'm only friends with you because I think you're hot and I don't have the guts to ask you out or I think you are not that into me." Because I wonder if these guys would be close friends with an unattractive girl.
Repped.

Sleazy, weak, and yellow-bellied.
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Old 06-26-2017, 02:56 PM
 
2,093 posts, read 1,931,046 times
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I would try and score with her first.
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Old 06-26-2017, 03:17 PM
 
Location: Huntsville, AL
2,852 posts, read 1,620,245 times
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I'd sit down with her one on one with no possible distractions.
Start off with, "I really trust your judgement and I need some direction as to what I should do. I have a very close friend who I'm growing more and more fond of all the time. I don't want to ruin our relationship, but I'm not sure how she'll handle knowing I've got a thing for her... what do you suggest I do?
See how she reacts and go from there.
When she asks who in the beginning, don't tell her.
When she asks who at the end, hold up a mirror to her.
Good luck.
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Old 06-26-2017, 04:15 PM
 
3,205 posts, read 2,630,938 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Whyrallnamestaken View Post
It's a shame that some men only befriend women they are attracted to. I think it is dishonest. "Hey I'm only friends with you because I think you're hot and I don't have the guts to ask you out or I think you are not that into me." Because I wonder if these guys would be close friends with an unattractive girl.
Have you really never seen 'When Harry Met Sally'?

It is about the most truthful film about male-female relationships ever made.
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Old 06-26-2017, 04:23 PM
 
Location: Southwest Washington State
30,585 posts, read 25,239,305 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by homenj View Post
Thanks for the advice to those who replied. I know I should just be honest with her. I stopped texting her but if she texts me or something I might just have to tell her unless I get over her or maybe at least I get these feelings under control. It was so confusing at first because she says she sees me as a brother. But then when we took a day trip to NYC she grabbed my arm for like five seconds and said "We should go to the Museum of Sex" one day. And she keeps telling me how handsome I am.
She is manipulating you. Find some other female friends. She regards you as a fall back guy. Surely you have more self respect than to play along!
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Old 06-26-2017, 08:03 PM
 
8,583 posts, read 16,032,686 times
Reputation: 11355
Quote:
Originally Posted by rugrats2001 View Post
Have you really never seen 'When Harry Met Sally'?

It is about the most truthful film about male-female relationships ever made.
I was thinking about that movie too..

I married a guy that I put in the "friend zone" for 6 months.
I needed time to move beyond that and if he had refused we would have been history.

I think being friends first can be a great foundation to beginning a romantic relationship.
Not the only way, but it can work.
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