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You'll probably never understand the brotherhood. But, it's real. Not for you, but for them. You can either accept it or you can be bitter about it for the rest of your life.
The brotherhood also needs to understand that none of them were selected as best man. They should respect the OP and quit being so controlling. Family is also real and creating competition between the two is unnecessary and in poor taste in this situation.
Here's the thing with love though - there is no limit to it. He can love all of them, and still have enough love for you.
I believe in putting blood families and spouses first and not viewing co-workers or friends in the same category as family. It pisses me off that my own brother is putting other people in that category and not telling his co-workers that he already has a brother and that's me and they aren't his brothers.
My brother has said that he wants a wedding party only bachelor party, so I'm stuck in a way as none of his other friends or our male relatives who live locally will be invited to the bachelor party.
That's odd. The bride doesn't have any male relatives that would probably like to be included? How about your male relatives or family friends?
The idea of a wedding isn't just the union of two people, it's also bringing families together.
Your brother's way could create a lot of hurt feelings that might start a precedent in regards to family relations. Not the best way to start off with relatives through marriage.
I believe in putting blood families and spouses first and not viewing co-workers or friends in the same category as family.
That's YOUR belief, others have their own.
So back to wedding stuff....
What festivities have you planned/done?
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Status:
"This too shall pass. But possibly, like a kidney stone."
(set 6 days ago)
35,933 posts, read 18,229,733 times
Reputation: 51009
Quote:
Originally Posted by vanb1181
I believe in putting blood families and spouses first and not viewing co-workers or friends in the same category as family.
My guess is, you weren't as bothered by this before the accident. Maybe, though.
I'm guessing this is one more loss in a long, long series of losses you've had and it's broken the proverbial camel's back. It's just too much.
You're having a bumpy painful time of settling in to the "new normal" of your life, a one much different from the one you were living before the accident.
That's odd. The bride doesn't have any male relatives that would probably like to be included? How about your male relatives or family friends?
The idea of a wedding isn't just the union of two people, it's also bringing families together.
Your brother's way could create a lot of hurt feelings that might start a precedent in regards to family relations. Not the best way to start off with relatives through marriage.
Have you brought that up to him?
The bride has two sisters and a much older half brother who lives in Australia most of the year. I know that some male relatives and other friends that my brother has from childhood and high school will be upset about not being invited to the bachelor party.
I can honestly see what you mean about the brotherhood mentality, but suck it up. This is your brother's wedding and you are his best man. Aside from some catastrophic argument between the two of you that you couldn't mend in time, I don't see any legitimate reason to back out. Grin and bear it.
I'm trying to plan the bachelor party and write a best man's speech. I was left out of the gifts they got for my brother and the Colts game and I wouldn' be surprised if they leave me out of other events where they to sporting events or other places.
Status:
"This too shall pass. But possibly, like a kidney stone."
(set 6 days ago)
35,933 posts, read 18,229,733 times
Reputation: 51009
Quote:
Originally Posted by vanb1181
The bride has two sisters and a much older half brother who lives in Australia most of the year. I know that some male relatives and other friends that my brother has from childhood and high school will be upset about not being invited to the bachelor party.
Well, that leaves a lot of room for you to do something simple and local for all the men who might expect to participate, and they can have their expensive out of town wild time and feelings won't be hurt.
I don't enjoy other people trying to take my place in my brother's life. At the end of the day they should just be like co-workers and not view each other as "family".
That's not how it works in certain professions. Police, Corrections, firefighters and military immediately come to mind. I can go to any American Legion or Veterans of Foreign Wars post and I'm with my brothers. Some I've known for decades, others I'll meet for the first time. But we're all brothers with a shared bond.
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