Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
Cristina, it sounds like you've painted yourself into a corner (that is, you've put yourself in a situation which has no exit).
Every time someone suggests an option, you state that option won't work.
So, there you are.
Rich
To me it appears that the mother and ?stepfather who is enabling their 38 year son by paying all of his expenses and allowing him to steal from multiple people (mom, dad, step-dad) is the problem not the OP.
To me it appears that the OP is in a terrible bind. Her brother stole thousands of dollars from their poor father with a low pension and mom convinced everyone not to call the police. And, now the poor OP (daughter) has to pay her father's expenses. And, may have to pay for more expenses in the future. She seems to be caught up in problems caused by other people.
So, OP, what is your biggest concern at this point? And how is this financially affecting you now? What laws are in place in your country which may offer you some protection?
First I have to apologize for my bad and rusty english. It is not my first language. But I need to talk about this to someone. I just don't know what to do anymore. A few months ago we discovered that my younger brother had made credit cards on our stepfather and father bank accounts. He stole more than 20.000 dollars from them. Our father suffered the most, because he have a very small pension to live on. It barely covers his monthly expenses. He took all the money of his father's account and left him with a lot of debts. My mother convinced our stepfather not to report him to the police. I strongly advised her to do something, though. But nothing was said to him, because she treats him like a little baby, a small child who can't take responsibility for anything, despite him being 38. She can be very angry if we talk about what he did.
I said I am also her daughter, but she won't listen. She wants me to happily agree with her ideas. I'm not worried about inheriting something, but I can't agree with this. I don't know what to say anymore to make my mother see the truth about my brother. I feel exausted.
Basically the answer is you can't do anything about it.
If you want a good read, get a used copy of "Beyond the Grave" from Amazon.
I know it is frustrating but the world is not a fair place and as long as the actual owners of the money are not declared legally "mad" in a court of law, what they do is up to them. If they want to allow a family member to rip them off...so be it.
In some countries - yes - kids can end up with debt caused by their parents woes. This could be taxes due on an inheritance they never received or the like.
If you report your brother to the police maybe that will be a wake up call. At this point who cares if your parents are mad as it doesn’t seem like things could get much worse.
Rich, this is exactly how I feel. I'm into a corner and I have no exit. I want to help my parents. I just wish everybody could live nicely but I feel worst things are to come.
Anyway, I feel grateful to everybody who answered me. It's been really helpful.
The owner of the account has to report the theft. I could report him to the police, but my mother begged me not to do it, and I didn't because I don't want to destroy our relationship.
Don't mean to be harsh, but this means you are like your mom as far as enabling your brother in his ways. It will just continue. If you really want to protect your parents, you'll take action.
Status:
"I don't understand. But I don't care, so it works out."
(set 10 days ago)
35,635 posts, read 17,982,736 times
Reputation: 50666
Quote:
Originally Posted by Harpaint
Don't mean to be harsh, but this means you are like your mom as far as enabling your brother in his ways. It will just continue. If you really want to protect your parents, you'll take action.
What he's doing isn't a crime. His biological parents are giving him money.
What good would it do to call police on a family member who isn't committing a crime?
What he's doing isn't a crime. His biological parents are giving him money.
What good would it do to call police on a family member who isn't committing a crime?
I believe she said in her opening post that he was stealing from his father, but maybe I misunderstood. The title of the thread states he stole from the father too.
What he's doing isn't a crime. His biological parents are giving him money.
What good would it do to call police on a family member who isn't committing a crime?
While I do not know the laws in the OP's country, I suspect that opening credit cards in someone else's name is a crime. I also suspect that draining someone else's bank account and leaving them with debts is probably also a crime.
And, I recall from other posts that the brother also stole jewelry (which he likely gave to his mistress -what a cad). Hmmm, I suspect that stealing things of value from another person is also a crime.
Quote:
Originally Posted by cristina_19701
A few months ago we discovered that my younger brother had made credit cards on our stepfather and father bank accounts. He stole more than 20.000 dollars from them. Our father suffered the most, because he have a very small pension to live on. It barely covers his monthly expenses. He took all the money of his father's account and left him with a lot of debts. (snip)
He is stealing from our mother since his adolescence.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
