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It's not that I am offended, it's that what is truly in their hearts and minds if the first thing they pinpoint is someone's skin color when a certain song comes on, or that skin color = certain abilities? Definition of racism!
Again not offended. Certainly not traumatized- LOL
I just do not think my friends are enhancing my spiritual growth, per they do not seem to be trying to enhance their own.
Let's put it in a different context: Let's say you were pretty spiritual and religious. In finding Jesus/Mohammed/ etc etc, you had chosen to live your life by that type of standard, and due to that felt overwhelming contentment (maybe an oxymoron, but bear with me)
Your friends were constantly partying, sleeping around, and then would complain about not being happy, not having fulfillment.
Though you had a) set the example; and b) attempted on multiple occasions to inspire a similar consciousness in them, they continued to do things which breed unhappiness, and would then complain that they were unhappy
At what point would you be DONE?
And what if being done meant putting your own past in the grave, and not really having anyone to hang out with?
You are falling into the “ better to have anyone than no one “ trap. You can actually close one door and open another, it doesn’t have to be all or nothing, you can actually work towards nurturing new friendships. Or are you that dependent that you can’t live your life without hanging out with someone/anyone?
Did I miss where you mentioned it was offensive to you?
Stop thinking they can read your mind.
No, I did not personally think if was racist. If you did, then it was racist to you.
As I came on here to read this, one of the girls posted to the group a meme, making fun of the Chinese people for having the coronavirus
I am ssssooooo not making this s*** up
As I came on here to read this, one of the girls posted to the group a meme, making fun of the Chinese people for having the coronavirus
I am ssssooooo not making this s*** up
OK, OP. But what you've described in recent posts, is that you're "stuck". You want out, but you can't see a practical way out. Is that a fair description of how you feel?
Perhaps post the meme so we can see what style of humor it is and level of offense. That will enable people to see what level of humor gets you up in arms.
Humor is used lots of times to reduce fear. Coronavirus is a frightening thing and some will find humor to be reassuring. Without seeing it, we can't see what the joke is trying to accomplish.
Perhaps post the meme so we can see what style of humor it is and level of offense. That will enable people to see what level of humor gets you up in arms.
Humor is used lots of times to reduce fear. Coronavirus is a frightening thing and some will find humor to be reassuring. Without seeing it, we can't see what the joke is trying to accomplish.
I finally talked to my husband about it. I had refrained for teh following reasons:
1) in order to over think the s*** out of it (LOL)
2) because, as discussed, it didn't bother him, so I figured I knew what he was going to say
He had a nice insight similar to yours (why I married him), that sometimes when people don't know what to do because they are inexperienced with a situation, they over-play their hand
He then related it to me not cooking and therefore over salting and spicing everything- whole different subject, LOL- but is actually a good analogy
This helps
But still Ruth is right, I would be ok without as many friends for a while. Weird that all these years I have tried to move forward into different groups/friends, and still at 51 haven't found "my tribe".
Putting someone in a specific box or category due to race is not racism? What definition are you looking at? Racism is not defined only as hating everyone from a specified race. Certainly that is the worst kind, but not the only kind.
I think you are just looking for a reason to ditch your friends, whose political beliefs differ from yours. You won't be the first leftie to end a friendship because your friends support Trump. It's happened to all of us. You have my permission to ditch them. We Trump supporters get tired of the judgement and the calling us racist over every perceived slight anyway.
I finally talked to my husband about it. I had refrained for teh following reasons:
1) in order to over think the s*** out of it (LOL)
2) because, as discussed, it didn't bother him, so I figured I knew what he was going to say
He had a nice insight similar to yours (why I married him), that sometimes when people don't know what to do because they are inexperienced with a situation, they over-play their hand
He then related it to me not cooking and therefore over salting and spicing everything- whole different subject, LOL- but is actually a good analogy
This helps
But still Ruth is right, I would be ok without as many friends for a while. Weird that all these years I have tried to move forward into different groups/friends, and still at 51 haven't found "my tribe".
Making new friends after a certain age is difficult, based on the threads we see here. And you're looking for a niche tribe.
Maybe try looking for some spiritual group on meetup if that's the tribe you're seeking?
Your husband sounds like a wise man. I would suggest you take his lead regardless of what group you find yourself in.
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