Is bullying as bad in private schools as it is in public schools?

[HawaiianGuy]

Bullying is bad everywhere schools (private and public) as well as online. Most people will get bullied online because the bullies are too scared to do it face to face.

[HawaiianGuy]

Originally Posted by Nedibes

I'm going to give the same advice that you would get if you posted on the Iowa board, "my daughter is black, how do I minimize the inevitable racial bullying in school [since I'm positive that racism is rampant there]?":

If you send your child into school with a chip on her shoulder about race, that sense of difference is going to communicate itself to her peers and may precipitate the exact problems you're trying to avoid. If you send her in respectful of differences and expecting to get along with everyone, she probably won't have any problems.

I will add that the people of color who I've seen ask questions like this generally manage to find a non-inflammatory way of phrasing it.

hawaii isn't racist towards blacks unless you live on Maui lol - most whites are more racist towards each other.

I have never seen blacks being bullied or subjected to racism. Hawaii isn't main land usa.

[Nedibes]

Originally Posted by HawaiianGuy

I have never seen blacks being bullied or subjected to racism. Hawaii isn't main land usa.

I was talking about the Iowa (where I live now) board. My point was that if this question were asked in reverse on a mainland board (person of color moving to a majority white school district), it would get a lot more flak (even though I think it would probably often be more justified). I think it's a function of white privilege (in much of the 48) that people moving from there to Hawaii think it's justified and OK to make such blatant accusations.

"If you are quiet and respectful you won't have any problems" is the standard advice that racial minorities get here (Iowa), which I think is generally pretty thoughtless; but what's sauce for the goose is sauce for the nene--and probably more true for the OP's situation than in many where I've seen it given.

[Yankeemama]

Originally Posted by Nedibes

I'm going to give the same advice that you would get if you posted on the Iowa board, "my daughter is black, how do I minimize the inevitable racial bullying in school [since I'm positive that racism is rampant there]?":

If you send your child into school with a chip on her shoulder about race, that sense of difference is going to communicate itself to her peers and may precipitate the exact problems you're trying to avoid. If you send her in respectful of differences and expecting to get along with everyone, she probably won't have any problems.

I will add that the people of color who I've seen ask questions like this generally manage to find a non-inflammatory way of phrasing it.

Great post and so true.

[Aiea Nana]

Hi,

May I suggest reading "Culture Shock! A Survival Guide to Customs and Etiquette" Hawaii. The author is Brent Massey and comes in soft cover. He has children in school and also addresses various neighborhoods on the island. It may help.

Good luck.