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I've been reading that thread on the other forum. So hateful! I can't believe people spend so much time on this stuff. It sounds like a forum for people who can't handle it here and have nothing to do but throw insults around.
I just wanted to say that there are posters here who are really looking for help, like me. Sometimes it comes when you ask a direct question and sometimes it comes in the least expected way like when somebody calls you out on your BS.
The difference I think between a person who can handle it and one who cannot is the purpose for the person being here in the first place. I came here because I *knew* I had problems and I still do have some that linger. So when I notice people jumping all over me I do try to take a step back and see if I am back to my old ways. That is why I am here most of the time, to figure out how I rub people the wrong way. Another road block was accepting that I was the problem most of the time, not an easy thing to do.
However, help has come another way for me specifically and what I consider to be the best way. It comes from a few posters who consistently write balanced posts but who also know when to bow out of a losing conversation. When I say losing, I mean one where respect has been lost. Those are the people I have learned the most from because that was how I realized what I was doing wrong IRL, it was lack of respect, not just to the other poster but to myself as well.
Thank goodness I have made a couple of friends like this IRL and managed to keep them because of the help I have received here on CD. After posting on forums, I realize that these people are few, just like they are on CD.
Good point, Crisan. I'm guilty of allowing myself to be baited by posters who are here just to be nitpicky and argue. On this kind of forum, I just don't see why those people hang around. If they aren't truly trying to help or contribute to the discussion and are just looking for a fight, I often call them out on it. But that is counterproductive, and I need to learn to ignore them.
Good point, Crisan. I'm guilty of allowing myself to be baited by posters who are here just to be nitpicky and argue. On this kind of forum, I just don't see why those people hang around. If they aren't truly trying to help or contribute to the discussion and are just looking for a fight, I often call them out on it. But that is counterproductive, and I need to learn to ignore them.
It is a good point. I'm really trying to just give my opinion and move on. If I know my posts might get attacked because some don't share my point of view, I avoid the thread. I notice some posters can only see things their way and can't accept others opinions/convictions. I find it best to just let them have the last word.
Yeowza. I don't know which other forum you're referring to and I don't think I want to know. I google my user name here and I get a ton of bars in the South.
Must be a popular name for a bar! There are few in my neck of the woods too!
Quote:
Originally Posted by DewDropInn
I use a different name for every forum I post on and change a few facts to protect the innocent.
The thing that blows my mind are the posters who attack others accusing them of lying because their details don't add up. Anyone would be out of their minds if they weren't vague or didnt' switch critical information around on the internet. Some people are just better at it.
Quote:
Originally Posted by DewDropInn
(Why people post about their sex lives is beyond me.)
Thankfully, I don't see much of that here on CD, but then again, maybe it's in the relationship forum. This is one of the few forums on the internet that I can stand. The censorship is just right. Members aren't overly censored, but there's a clear line that keeps the forum civil.
Quote:
Originally Posted by DewDropInn
OK baking cookies sounds good but I celebrated my team's win a little too much last night. maciesmom, for the record, is a gracious looser. Thanks, my friend. It's Monday so that means laundry. I hope I can conceal my utter glee.
Cookies and laundry! My goodness! I'm so far behind! I haven't baked cookies yet. Finally, school is over for me this term. I plan to get the house in order and have cookies baked before next weekend is over!
Quote:
Originally Posted by maciesmom
I totally agree - I will say I have made a few nice friendships here on CD. I pretty much limit the threads I post on to where there are posters I enjoy exchanging with.
I don't even open many threads in this forum. I'm always surprised when I learn there's something going on somewhere! Some difficult members can disappear from my radar due to the sheer fact that I simply try to ignore where they are posting. But sometimes I can't control myself.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Zimbochick
Are you guys really surprised? Choosing passive, easy to manipulate spouse + not getting on with family/in-laws + fighting with doctors + fighting with teachers + fighting with other parents at school + fighting with everyone here = ginormous personality disorder!
NOW I know what everyone is talking about!
Quote:
Originally Posted by strawflower
Which thread is it?! I have a good idea of who you all are talking about it, but just out of curiosity, I want to read the thread! I'm in the mood for some entertainment!
Me too! I'm going to try to find it! I finished my last research paper and finals. (I was up until 7am----didn't sleep all night finishing a paper!) I plan on just laying back and taking it easy today. I've got some time to kill. And some entertainment would be a nice distraction. THERE'S SNOW EVERYWHERE! I don't want to go outside. I just want to curl up on the sofa with my laptop and an afghan today and recover from all of my hard work!
Quote:
Originally Posted by kahskye
I just want to say how impressed I am w/ all of you for not stooping down to her level of nasty comments. I was quite shocked to google and find that. I knew the first two names she's gone by, but not the one of that forum. There is a new poster here and I just wondered if anyone picked up on the possiblity it might be her?
Someone rep'd me with a comment warning me about that. I haven't seen that new poster lately, but that might be due to the fact I haven't been online much over the past week or maybe I'm just not in the same threads.
Quote:
Originally Posted by crisan
Thank goodness I have made a couple of friends like this IRL and managed to keep them because of the help I have received here on CD. After posting on forums, I realize that these people are few, just like they are on CD.
That's really sweet of you to share! I think internet forums can be a blessing for many people. I believe most members who are at times tough (I know I can be one of them at times) have the best intentions. The truely evil ones are very rare---on the internet and in real life.
There are actually more than half a dozen threads "there" about posters/mods here. I don't know if any of you are old enough to remember slam-books...but that's the impression I get when I peek over there. Funny thing, is someone who is no longer a member here, who posts there regularly under several names, "accuses" other posters there, of being me.
I posted there I think - twice. When I first took a peek a few weeks ago (after someone here sent me a rep "warning" me...seems now like it was more of an invitation, I should've known better)..and tht one who "accused" other posters of being me, didn't "accuse" me of being me. The sad thing, is that this person duped us all into thinking (even for a moment) that she is an adult with young children. I'm more sure now than before, that she is probably just a child, and if her mother found out she was posting she'd probably toss her computer out the window and ground her til she was 21.
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