Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
This is why there is the option of homeschooling. Just saying- I mean, I feel bad for what happened with your son, but at the same time, you can't expect the teachers and school to always know what parents are going to send into school. If all schools banned everything that kids are allergic too, kids wouldn't be eating or touching anything.
Lisalan, it came to my mind last night that your son might be placed in an inclusion class with disabled children because he has a nut allergy.
The school might view his needing a nut-free room and wearing an epi pen as special needs.
That might be why he is being exposed to so many confrontations with various students---D who can't control his anger and P with the misplaced nose.
This might be the only inclusion class for his grade and that's why it's the nut free classroom.
You might want to reconsider how important it is for you to have your son in a nut free classroom if having a nut free classroom means being placed with the special needs children.
Another thing I was thinking was that this was an eventuality. Inevitably, there was going to be a mistake, which is why your teaching him about how to handle new and different foods was so fabulous. If this was his first close call, it's a major milestone! I hope he was richly rewarded by being so prudent and showing such fantastic judgment and decision making.
But handling the issue in a low toned, calm manner, which is out of the sight/ears of the other students and your son would be my suggestion. The child knew it was a mistake, told you, and refrained from eating it. Gold star or ice cream sundae or some other big "yay, great job" reward is due to him to reinforce this. Keep the emotions out of the classroom and away from your son's view. He is doing really well on his own. If you are always intervening in an hysterical way, it will make the child appear weak to his peers, and maybe prompt him to be made fun of. If you can keep your interactions with the teachers/administration behind closed doors (i.e., not in front of the kids), keep yourself and your son calm, and continue to grow his self-confidence (rather than spinning into an emotional rant in front of him or his peers), it will make him appear more confident and less "mommy'd" in front of the others. That might help him with his interactions with the other kids. He may become neurotic about the peanuts rather than confident and self-resourceful if these incidents turn into hysterial episodes on your part.
I hope this makes sense. The words aren't flowing well today. I offer this respectfully, not in a criticizing way. You reached a major milestone (he identified, recognized and refrained from danger) which is exactly what you have been training him to do. How is he doing? Is he calm or freaked out by the fact that PB got in his candy?
I agree, but i can see how this would slip. Many people would forget that certain candies have peanut products in them. In fact i would have looked over it. and i think a lot of people would as well.
How can you not realize a peanut butter cup does not have peanuts?
Which is why teachers rely on parents to help out. Perhaps she asked a class mother to check and she said a ok. When i went to school never did a teacher dole out the candy at our halloween parties....and plenty of kids had allergies back then as well. the class Mothers did all that type of stuff and were the ones making sure the children didn't eat what they weren't supposed to. Maybe it's just a case of an old teacher as well, but we don't know on that end really.
it is called responsibility. The teacher is ultimately responsible for the health of her students while under her care.
Yes the class mom mave have gone through the candy, but the teacher is still responsible. It is her classroom.
The problem with any health issues in school is that as a parent you are very knowledgeable about your own childs health issues, but multiply that 22 or 28 children in a class and you would need the teacher to be an RN or more. Yes, they can be educated about the specific needs, but it's a lot of responsibility for the teacher. In my daughter's second grade class alone this year there is a Type 1 diabetic with an insulin pump, a severe asthmatic, an epileptic, one child with severe tree nut allergies, another with tree nut, peanut, and gluten allergies, and another who has severe allergies to seafood and asparagus. It's confusing for the teacher, and the other parents. If the teacher was concerning herself with 22 snacks and lunches, she would not be able to get much teaching done. Bear in mind too that parents of children with no allergies are just not in the mindset of thinking about it, and are not very comfortable reading ingredient lists. For example before my child was diagnosed with tree nut allergies, I had no idea what a filbert was, and wouldn't have known to exclude products containing it for a class with tree nut allergies. Our school nurse is very involved in the classroom, and will always check ingredient lists if need be.
We all want what's best for our children, and for them to be in the safest environment possible, and to do that effectively you need to use all the resources at your disposal. That includes the school nurse, and educating your child so they are as self-sufficient as early as is possible. That is the only guarantee.
if the diabetic girl goes into shock and dies is the teacher resolved of all liability because "it was too much to know"? If it is too much for her to know then she should be in another profession. And, I do understand your point. But the tgeacher is the adult. She should be aware of the signs that may kill one of the students. My co-workers know what to do if I crash (I am also Type 1). It is not their responsibility, but they also would rather not see me dead. As diabetics we are told to let people around us know the signs or crashing and what to do until the ambulance gets here.
1. This is the second kid and I believe the third incident of your son getting hit. You need to take the initiative and teach him how to defend himself physically. All the rules and supervision in the world aren't going to deter a kid from hitting him over minor things as seems to be the case. I would recommend karate, kickboxing or Tae Kwan Do. Any martial art will focus on discipline as well as self defense.
2. I know we won't see eye to eye when it comes to allergies, but you cannot reasonably expect your son to NEVER be exposed to peanuts. Obviously everyone makes the attempt, but mistakes will happen. I'm not giving the teacher a pass for what happened, as she is well aware of what COULD have happened. You taught your son well enough that he knows not to eat it and you followed the schools rules for notification. After that it isn't reasonable for you to expect 100% compliance. If the allergy is so severe that simple exposure (touching or inhalation) can cause a severe reaction (less than 1% of all peanut allergy sufferers have those reactions), then you really shouldn't put your son in public school.
If this were me, I would take a measured approach. I think a simple conversation with the teacher and principal is warranted. Compose your speaking points and let them know that you expect better from them regarding these issues. Just know that it doesn't sound like it's something that they either have (or you can reasonably expect them to have) 100% control over. Since that is reality, you will need to arm your son with the things he needs and knowledge to defend himself.
1. This is the second kid and I believe the third incident of your son getting hit. You need to take the initiative and teach him how to defend himself physically. All the rules and supervision in the world aren't going to deter a kid from hitting him over minor things as seems to be the case. I would recommend karate, kickboxing or Tae Kwan Do. Any martial art will focus on discipline as well as self defense.
2. I know we won't see eye to eye when it comes to allergies, but you cannot reasonably expect your son to NEVER be exposed to peanuts. Obviously everyone makes the attempt, but mistakes will happen. I'm not giving the teacher a pass for what happened, as she is well aware of what COULD have happened. You taught your son well enough that he knows not to eat it and you followed the schools rules for notification. After that it isn't reasonable for you to expect 100% compliance. If the allergy is so severe that simple exposure (touching or inhalation) can cause a severe reaction (less than 1% of all peanut allergy sufferers have those reactions), then you really shouldn't put your son in public school.
If this were me, I would take a measured approach. I think a simple conversation with the teacher and principal is warranted. Compose your speaking points and let them know that you expect better from them regarding these issues. Just know that it doesn't sound like it's something that they either have (or you can reasonably expect them to have) 100% control over. Since that is reality, you will need to arm your son with the things he needs and knowledge to defend himself.
there is a grade school behind me house. When a new student arrived with a severe nut allergy we, and everyone in our neighborhood, were notified bascially to not leave nut items on the playground if our kids went there at night. It is a public school. While I agree that private schools are better at certain things aI do not believe all are. Neither do I believe all public schools are inept.
there is a grade school behind me house. When a new student arrived with a severe nut allergy we, and everyone in our neighborhood, were notified bascially to not leave nut items on the playground if our kids went there at night. It is a public school. While I agree that private schools are better at certain things aI do not believe all are. Neither do I believe all public schools are inept.
So, if you put out nuts for the squirrels in your yard, and the squirrel has chosen the playground as his location for burrowing and hides the nuts in the ground in the playground for the winter...
do they sue the squirrel for killing their kid, or you? Or do they sue the security company for not ordering the squirrel out? Or do they sue the town for not arresting the squirrel for illegal trespass?
I just think this is absolutely insane. A school, telling homeowners not to put nuts in the school's playground? Why in the world WOULD a homeowner leave his property, go to the schoolyard, and place nuts on the ground? What kind of ridiculousness is it that a school would even think of such a thing? If I was the homeowner I'd just shake my head sadly and wonder if the school is getting too much of my tax money, that it can hire people to come up with this kind of nonsense.
So, if you put out nuts for the squirrels in your yard, and the squirrel has chosen the playground as his location for burrowing and hides the nuts in the ground in the playground for the winter...
do they sue the squirrel for killing their kid, or you? Or do they sue the security company for not ordering the squirrel out? Or do they sue the town for not arresting the squirrel for illegal trespass?
I just think this is absolutely insane. A school, telling homeowners not to put nuts in the school's playground? Why in the world WOULD a homeowner leave his property, go to the schoolyard, and place nuts on the ground? What kind of ridiculousness is it that a school would even think of such a thing? If I was the homeowner I'd just shake my head sadly and wonder if the school is getting too much of my tax money, that it can hire people to come up with this kind of nonsense.
My real question is how do people with such severe allergies shop for groceries? My sister has a severe milk and egg allergy. And she is currently siting in my living room and I do not rid my house of milk and egg products when she comes to stay. We usually go shopping for stuff and I usually have stuff she can eat. I still have all my chocolate covered pretzels and I just ate and egg and cheese sandwich. Don't get me wrong she's severely allergic and carries and epipen, however we have never asked the school to be completely milk and egg free. She's actually led a pretty much normal life, with only herself to rely on when it came to her allergies at school.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
