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I raised four children, two of which are sons. They were told they were handsome all the time and both my husband and I. We also never resisted with the kissing and hugging. It was stated earlier that in time they will resist a little and that is fine, its normal, but at the ages you stated your kids are, your wife is doing exactly what a good Mom should be doing. If I were you I would start showing more affection. Showing affection doesn't mean you can't discipline them and show them the proper way to act, it just shows the kids that they are loved. Being in a loving environment builds confidence and respect.
I hope Daddy is giving them hugs and kisses and compliments and i Love You's too now - can mean the difference between visiting the morgue or prison later.
My parent's were older and all about respect and authority (like the original poster), wish I had all the kisses, hugs, and I love yous and a solid non-judgemental foundation - would have been a lot cheaper than all the therapy I have had to go through.
I hope so, they always run up to her and don't let her go as soon as she gets home.
If I had a choice, even as a adult, to spend my time with a person who treated me with compassion and affection or someone who was constantly correcting me and expecting me to live up to some imagined notion of proper behavior, which one do you think I would choose?
It's possible for fathers to instill discipline, respect, and a willingness to achieve (which is what I think you want) while still demonstrating love and affection. You do love your children don't you? If you don't show them, they will think you don't. They're only children, not soldiers. They respond to positive examples and deeds, not lectures and programming. Affection reinforces lessons you are trying to teach them.
The website link below also has a lot of good advice on parenting. Among many other interesting ideas, it quotes the respected writer William Raspberry who has written, "The difference between happy, well-adjusted children and their opposites has, in my view, precious little to do with the presence or absence of spanking. It has everything to do with the presence or absence of love. I wouldn't urge that parents who are capable of exerting discipline in other ways should spank their children because my parents spanked me. I argue only that the denial of love is the ultimate brutality." Growing Together: The Key To Creative Parenting
Someone here previously posted...what would the OP do if one of his sons ended up gay?
I noticed this question never got answered.
I'd like to take the next logical step...what if one of those kids ended up transgender?
Would he love that child less? Would he turn his back on that kid?
Would he chastise that child...would he try to "fix" that child?
Or would he love that child?
Would he blame his wife for the fact that the kid wound up transgender? Would this tear the whole family apart because the OP has such rigid ideals and is unable to deal with anything outside of his own little comfort zone?
What little I do know about parenting comes from friends who have told me what they go through...and from what I can gather...being a good parent requires often stepping outside of one's own comfort zone.
I have never been a parent to anything other than dogs. I am not physically able to have children, and it's a good thing, I probably would have been a horrible parent, anyway...I had pretty bad parenting growing up the child of an alcoholic abusive father.
The most secure, successful, confident people I know had very loving parents.
I hope you will adopt some of your wife's affections. Your sons will benefit from it.
I am not one of those people, but I married one. I like to see the contrast between us because of the way we were raised. The OP's sons have a huge advantage in their security, self-image and future relationships if they get affection from their father like they do from their mother.
I hope so, they always run up to her and don't let her go as soon as she gets home.
And, one day, that will simply stop. As the parent of an 18 year old, believe me, I know. It will stop LONG before they turn 18 and your wife will miss it and you will wish you had hugged them more.
As the mother of a boy, there is great angst when your boy doesn't seem to be 'tough' enough. One of the attorney's I work with made his boys watch at least one hour of ESPN every day because he though his wife was too soft with them, too.
Boys have to conform to a very rigid ideal OR . . everyone freaks out. It's sad, really. It seems girls are allowed a broader range of ideals, they can be dancers OR they can be jocks and it's ok. A boy, can be only one.
So you're jealous!? Seriously? You're worried that she's "baby-ing" 2-4-6 year olds? They're her babies! Of course she's babying them. You'd rather she MAN them? Just be glad you have 3 sons, who have a mother who loves them enough to baby them a bit.
Just be happy for your sons, that they have a mother who loves them enough to WANT to take care of them. Be happy for your sons, that their mother refuses to throw them off to someone else to raise. Be happy for yourself, that you married a woman who takes her job as a mother...seriously!
You should be considering yourself a very fortunate man, one who has an amazing wife. You wanna honor her? Learn something from her. Try being her true partner. Learn how to be as good at being a father, as your wife is...at being a mother.
You'll have your chance. Get on the floor and tumble with them. Get out there and teach them how to play catch and climb trees!
This ^
Have "boys" night once a week or once every 2 weeks (depending on your schedules). Your wife can go out with her friends or invite them in to the house. Just bring this up to her ahead of time so she is not caught off-guard or thinking you don't want her around. I hope you and your wife and the boys do things together as well, ie - vacations, tours, etc. You can still "tour around" with the boys. Maybe a sports museum. Read a book to them at night from a favorite sport. Watch different shows from the 60's and 70's with them showing the way different families communicate with one another. When the weather gets warmer, put up a tent in the back yard - teach them about camping, reading books about bugs, plants, etc., [be age appropriate as the 2 year old won't grasp or be able to handle the same things as the 6 year old would be able to].
Have "boys" night once a week or once every 2 weeks (depending on your schedules). Your wife can go out with her friends or invite them in to the house. Just bring this up to her ahead of time so she is not caught off-guard or thinking you don't want her around. I hope you and your wife and the boys do things together as well, ie - vacations, tours, etc. You can still "tour around" with the boys. Maybe a sports museum. Read a book to them at night from a favorite sport. Watch different shows from the 60's and 70's with them showing the way different families communicate with one another. When the weather gets warmer, put up a tent in the back yard - teach them about camping, reading books about bugs, plants, etc., [be age appropriate as the 2 year old won't grasp or be able to handle the same things as the 6 year old would be able to].
Having 3 sons and 1 daughter, I can say...It's awfully nice when Dad did "guy stuff" with the boys....ah, it does the heart good! Hubby must have been doing something right, because ALL of my kids ran to him, when he got home from work. Maybe it had something to do with the fact that he loved them, he hugged them, he snuggled with them and he always had time for them....always.
I know that respect and deference are out of fashion these days but I greatly appreciate it.
Make sure you dont confuse fear with respect. They are not the same thing at all.
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Hubby must have been doing something right, because ALL of my kids ran to him, when he got home from work. Maybe it had something to do with the fact that he loved them, he hugged them, he snuggled with them and he always had time for them....always. 
