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Sending her to bed without dinner has nothing to do with what she's done wrong and doesn't teach her anything. If this is new behavior. ..well...some of it is just the age and it doesn't pay to get upset at every attitude problem. As long as she's not being disrespectful to you...let her hate the world..hate her life...think her chores are do over the top.
For the serious ones.....we coached our daughter on ways to express herself....same message but less 'tude and gave her one chance to correct what she said...then the punishment was given out instantly and did not keep her from the family...extra chore or doing something extra for the family.
Going to bed without dinner is well.....tad out of Dickens don't you think? There is just no call for it.
I think that the best thing to do when she talks that way is ignore her. At 12 she isn't likely to respond to those things (just being honest) so simply don't react. Eventually she will need something from you (help with homework, etc), and then you can say "when you're rude to me, you don't get what you want." Then remind her of how she treated you earlier.
Mine are only 3 and 6, but I wouldn't go as far as NO dinner--just no dessert.
I sent my kid to his room with the message that meal time was designed to be a pleasant experience and that his attitude was giving me indigestion; therefore, he was excused until he could be civil. Furthermore, if he chose to nurse that attitude all night, it was no skin off my nose, but I wasn't about to allow him to ruin dinner for the rest of the family. He came down about twenty minutes later with a sincere apology. It never happened again. So, yeah, I think it was a very effective lesson.
I sent my kid to his room with the message that meal time was designed to be a pleasant experience and that his attitude was giving me indigestion; therefore, he was excused until he could be civil. Furthermore, if he chose to nurse that attitude all night, it was no skin off my nose, but I wasn't about to allow him to ruin dinner for the rest of the family. He came down about twenty minutes later with a sincere apology. It never happened again. So, yeah, I think it was a very effective lesson.
This. Though the attitude was, "That's gross. I'm not going to eat that. You aren't a very good cook." That got, "You're excused" and nothing to eat until a sincere apology was made.
5-ish. They learned to keep their opinions about the cook's skills to themselves. Quickly.
I sent my kid to his room with the message that meal time was designed to be a pleasant experience and that his attitude was giving me indigestion; therefore, he was excused until he could be civil. Furthermore, if he chose to nurse that attitude all night, it was no skin off my nose, but I wasn't about to allow him to ruin dinner for the rest of the family. He came down about twenty minutes later with a sincere apology. It never happened again. So, yeah, I think it was a very effective lesson.
This is how we (mostly) handled those types of situations whether it was mealtime or other family time. Not to say there weren't times when I was at the end of my rope with 16 yr old attitude and lost my temper. I can't remenber ever sending someone to bed without supper but neither would I bet the farm I hadn't. I have blocked much of those times from my memory at this point.
This is how we (mostly) handled those types of situations whether it was mealtime or other family time. Not to say there weren't times when I was at the end of my rope with 16 yr old attitude and lost my temper. I can't remenber ever sending someone to bed without supper but neither would I bet the farm I hadn't. I have blocked much of those times from my memory at this point.
I have pretty good kids overall, but I've blocked a few things from my memory, too. It's a good way to approach family life in general.
I sent my kid to his room with the message that meal time was designed to be a pleasant experience and that his attitude was giving me indigestion; therefore, he was excused until he could be civil. Furthermore, if he chose to nurse that attitude all night, it was no skin off my nose, but I wasn't about to allow him to ruin dinner for the rest of the family. He came down about twenty minutes later with a sincere apology. It never happened again. So, yeah, I think it was a very effective lesson.
If I was going to send my child away from the dinner table, it would be like this, and focused purely on how his behavior is negatively impacting everyone else and that when/if he was ready to join us he could do so.
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